Eva Longoria

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I’m certain Eva Longoria has some new man in her life and I’m certain I’m not going to investigate. Why ruin a perfectly good fantasy about Eva in her bikini asking me to sunscreen some spots she missed as she tells me about how people don’t realize how lonely life can be for a successful actress and model in Hollywood. Then I tell her I totally understand even though I don’t and I find some additional spots she missed with the lotion, some spots she didn’t even know existed.

Perhaps my mind wanders too much with such detailed journeys into the libido, but how can you not get carried away when this Latina hottie with her stellar bikini body is prancing about pools in Miami, just months away from joining the veteran hottie Forty and Faptastic club. Oh, my, I want to be her boy toy so badly. There is no job to menial or humiliating, Eva. I mean, I couldn’t bring myself to watch any of your shows or movies, but I would be willing to watch you watch. Clothing optional naturally. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlyNet

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Eva Longoria is about half a year away from becoming the most certain member of the Faptastic and Forty club here on Egotastic. The hot bodied most eligible Latina is not only sultry and alluring and not too shabby in the able to take care of me in the financial ways in which I’m accustomed department, she also continues to look crazy veteran hot in a bikini, a little bit of fabric that constantly needs adjusting.

It’s not every woman in the world that causes me to become catatonic from seeing them fixing their bikini tops or crawling on all fours across a chaise lounge chair, but Eva definitely falls into that category. Just so fine and born to tan. Will Eva and I ever get together for real? My lips are sealed. Though not for you, Eva. Have your girl call my girl and we’ll work something out. I majored in college in illicit rendezvous, though I will be tempted to alert the paps so they can see my smiling mug as you leave my abode at 5am covering your shame face. Enjoy.

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I haven’t really kept up with Eva Longoria and her busy love life of late, though I do believe she remains one of Hollywood’s most eligible bachelorettes with money, power, and a slamming bikini body with a sultry Latina flair. The trifecta of the perfect woman.

Eva has been vacationing with some dude or another in Italy, and took time out of her tourist schedule to show off her bikini body by the pool at her resort. Oh, yes, Eva Longoria has still very much got it. Frontside, backside, topside, downside. There’s not an inch of Eva Longoria I wouldn’t bathe to slather in lotion and then later insist that yes, that really is just lotion, now close your eyes and go back to sleep. Eva does include some pretty naughty thoughts. Enjoy.