Eva Longoria

Eva Longoria Bikini Pictures Are Hot Crackle and Pop in Miami

Eva Longoria is about half a year away from becoming the most certain member of the Faptastic and Forty club here on Egotastic. The hot bodied most eligible Latina is not only sultry and alluring and not too shabby in the able to take care of me in the financial ways in which I’m accustomed department, she also continues to look crazy veteran hot in a bikini, a little bit of fabric that constantly needs adjusting.

It’s not every woman in the world that causes me to become catatonic from seeing them fixing their bikini tops or crawling on all fours across a chaise lounge chair, but Eva definitely falls into that category. Just so fine and born to tan. Will Eva and I ever get together for real? My lips are sealed. Though not for you, Eva. Have your girl call my girl and we’ll work something out. I majored in college in illicit rendezvous, though I will be tempted to alert the paps so they can see my smiling mug as you leave my abode at 5am covering your shame face. Enjoy.

Eva Longoria Bikinis Poolside in Miami

The lovely Eva Longoria was spotted lounging poolside in Miami in a small multicolored bikini. Eva is truly in tremendous shape. Her tight, toned stomach looks amazing. Eva also has a really nice pair of ta-tas. They are like the boobies Goldilocks picked, not too big, not too small, but juuuuust right. There is some nice cleavage action going on in these pics. But what I am all about is her booty. Good Lord, she has a nice booty. I remember admiring it years ago on Desperate Housewives and it still looks as good as it did back then. Some things just get better with age.

Eva is from the same town where my mom lives in Texas. Every time I’m visiting her I always hope I’m going to run into either Eva or her any number of younger cousins. It’s yet to happen but I am still hopeful.

Eva Longoria Bikini ‘Toe’ and Hot Booty Flashing in Italy

I haven’t really kept up with Eva Longoria and her busy love life of late, though I do believe she remains one of Hollywood’s most eligible bachelorettes with money, power, and a slamming bikini body with a sultry Latina flair. The trifecta of the perfect woman.

Eva has been vacationing with some dude or another in Italy, and took time out of her tourist schedule to show off her bikini body by the pool at her resort. Oh, yes, Eva Longoria has still very much got it. Frontside, backside, topside, downside. There’s not an inch of Eva Longoria I wouldn’t bathe to slather in lotion and then later insist that yes, that really is just lotion, now close your eyes and go back to sleep. Eva does include some pretty naughty thoughts. Enjoy.

Eva Longoria Leggy Strutting Lovely Latina Seductress With a Large Bag

I’ve really missed Eva Longoria. I’m not exactly sure where she’s been of late, but we’ve seen little of the most eligible bachelorette of late, which makes me sad, as a child who has dropped his ice cream cone on the ground. For any time we lose sight of our eye candy, it’s a melancholy time. Especially when that candy is sultry and Latina and single and hot and leggy and showing off her gams in a summer dress in Hollywood.

Oh, Eva, the things we would do together. Like expensive shopping trips where I’d suddenly forget my wallet and you’d have to pay for all the beautiful lingerie I was treating you too. We would have so much fun seeing just how passion inducing you could be with just your shapely calves running across my good touch bad touch regions. Eva, now that you’re back in town, call me. Let’s get a Starbucks and some organic lubricants. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, and Eva Longoria Form a Trio of Hotness at Unite4Good

I’m not exactly sure what Unite4Good is, but based on it’s title I’m going to declare it charitable, and hip with the clever use of ’4′ instead of ‘Four’. The kids all love that. I do know that it was a cause grand enough to bring out the sextastic likes of saucy Latinas Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, and Eva Longoria. It certainly has me feeling fine.

Once more, I am left wondering where my invite was to the ball. My fairy godmother seems to have abandoned me too as I was hoping perhaps she could turn my dead AA battery here into a Prius or something and announce I was off to dance the night away with Selena, Demi, and Eva. I guess this all just happens in my mind once more. Enjoy.

Eva Longoria in Booty Hugging Tights? Oh, Yes Please

Now there’s something we don’t see very often. Certainly not often enough. Candid shots of one of the world’s most eligible bachelorettes, Eva Longoria, in body hugging booty tights jogging about town. Typically, Eva is only seen in public highly put together and on paparazzi alert. Here, orange butt-blaring stretch pants.

Is this perhaps an intentional gesture by Eva to get everybody to notice her might fine 38-year old Latina female form? I like to think so. In the very least, I am most definitely noticing. And smiling. And a couple other gerunds. Enjoy.

Eva Longoria Is Single and Cleavetastically Ready to Mingle

Eva Longoria, one of the world’s most eligible bachelorettes, is single again after a short passionate fling with a Latino male model who I can’t help but feel is both taller and more guapo than myself. But, I guess she got tired of seeing his pretty face every morning, or maybe he just forgot to put the toilet seat back down, either way, it’s over, and Eva is once more eligible.

To signal her new found singleness, Eva strapped on a low cut top and promptly took a bike ride around Los Angeles to remind all the men just how sextastic she is. I’m not sure if she toted her 1040K behind her to also show how crazy wealthy she is, for that may have simply started a dude riot. As for me, I care not for the coin of the realm, beyond, obviously, being kept in the lifestyle to which I’ve become accustomed. But a hot girl on a bike, for that I care very very much. So hot, Eva. Enjoy.