Angie Heyward Joins Naked News; You Get To See Her On Naked News for One-Week Free!

 

I know, I'm awesome. I had a cousin who told me that once. Not so remarkable save for it's the only instance of a blood relative ever complimenting me. And that was only after I sent her twenty bucks via Paypal to purchase medical marijuana for her 20-something cataracts. Anyhow, that's besides that point. I am once again completely awesome as I have convinced the good folks at Naked News to give EgoReaders a one-week free viewing period for Naked News since Angie Heyward is now available in the raw hot news giving flesh. I'm not going to call it a must see, even though, yeah, it is.

Holy Cannolis Angie Heyward in her nekkid entertainment news clips!
Double Holy Cannolis Naked News Free For One Week!

For those that don't know, Naked News is a completely legit news organization with daily programs on Hollywood, music, pop culture, and events of the day with hot anchors who get completely naked. It's Entertainment Tonight, except Mary Hart is butt naked. Sure, you can keep watching boring depressing news on TV, or you can watch sexy naked girls delivering the news and occasionally going nude bowling or nude aerobics. That tough choice is up to you, young Padawan. Enjoy.

Devin Brugman and Natasha Oakley Bosom Bikini Buddies For Your Menage-A-Ta-Ta Fantsies

At last, my two imaginary young girlfriends are together in Miami on the beach in their bikinis. We've been staring at both Devin Brugman and Natasha Oakley individually this week along the beach in their perfectly fitting bikinis. That is their job after all. Finally, we get a chance to see the two bodacious besties together in their two piece bits of revealing finery. The whole of the sextastic really is greater than the sum of its parts when these two ladies form the supremely hot bread in the Egotastic! sandwich. Yes, read that as me being the meat. I shall suffer thusly for my art.

Sometimes, I just don't know what's wrong with this world. But I always know what's right. Two hot girls pimping bikinis with their very own perfectly fine bodies. That's most definitely right. Now, let's get down to that sandwich making. Enjoy.

Lucy Collett Topless Black Panties Striptease for Ginger Snapping Happy Times

 

Lucy Collett just seems like she'd be a fun gal to have on a summer road trip. Especially when I announced the topless only rules for my car. I bet she wouldn't balk at that rule. Or the one where we take turns sitting on the driver's lap and she's the only passenger. Your turn again, Lucy. Beg my ungentlemanly thoughts, but Lucy and her ginger topped sweet topless body tends to make prurient thoughts race through my head like greyhounds chasing a rabbit. Only, I don't want to eat the rabbit, I want to rub it all over with hot baby oil then tickle it with feathers. I don't know, maybe the greyhounds really want to do that too. I can't read dog minds.

Lucy, you are my sweet teated treat. I have been fond of you through think and skin. I think that's how the expression goes. Someday, we shall be together and the sounds of our merry giggles shall be matched only by the primal screams of our passions. And that's just the first date. Call me, let's make this happen. My iPhone informs me my calendar is open until as far as the calendar goes. Enjoy.

Lacey Banghard Chests Up to Sam Cooke for Game on in Boobtastic Battle Mode

 

I love it when the girls get together for a little flouncy funbag in your face time. It's the world's least violent and most arousing competition we like to call the Battle of the Boobtastic. Two lovely ladies, four faptastic chestal fineries. One will walk away with the prize package of my earnest appreciation and un-ending desire while the other will walk away with pretty much the same.

I don't play favorites. But in the contest of summer melons betwixt Lacey Banghard and Sam Cooke, you must do that very thing. In your talented and experienced opinion, between these two ladies of my dreams, whose ta-ta's reign supreme?

Battle of the Boobtastic: Lacey Banghard vs. Sam Cooke

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Selena Gomez Hot Legs and Panties Peek at St. Tropez Gala

Leonardo Dicaprio launched his new wildlife foundation with a bang, that bang coming mostly from Selena Gomez showing up looking like a million damn dollars to his St. Tropez gala. Selena has been in the news aplenty of late. Bikinis, lesbionic scandals, Bieber umpteenth breakups. But through it all, I like to keep in mind that Selena Gomez will always be my little Latina diva hottie.

If I needed any reminder of that, I need only look at those super toned legs whose length seems to defy her very height. Not to mention a peek at her panties in a very grown up dress as she moved from yacht to party like a true A-list movie star. You know this talk of her Sapphic leanings only makes me want her more. That's how I roll. Selena, please come to my place in that high slit dress and we shall roll together. Enjoy.

Candice Swanepoel Sextastic Wanton Wet Hottie

I'd watch Candice Swanepoel eat a lettuce sandwich with a big smile on my face. That South African super sextastic blonde could do anything and make it crazy hot. And when she's actually trying to look wet and hot and sultry in a photoshoot, forget about it, everything passion inducing raises by treble.

In this Fernando de Noronha shoot, with dude removed as best possible, Candice shows that she's much more than just a staid catalog model. When Candice gets to alluring poses, she takes it right off the charts. Let's just call these poses romantic by the beach. And, by romance,  I think you know I mean downright outstanding levels of lust inducement. Candice, you really are a treat. Enjoy.

Mariana Braga Topless Natural Brazilian Model Dripping Goodness

 

Somebody once asked me if it was okay just to photograph a hot Brazilian model nekkid just because she was a hot Brazilian model who was nekkid. Okay, nobody ever asked me that, but I wish they would. I don't get the chance to say 'hell yes' often enough in my life. As in, hell yes I'd like to see Mariana Braga flashing her naturally nice funbags and loofah washing her lady nest. You know how I feel about loofahs, you definitely know how I feel about sextastic women's special happy places. Mix the two together and we have a big time wow. A damn wow.

Well, just take a look at these sinister hot photos by Alessandro Casagrande and come up with words of your own. If you are able to speak. Enjoy.