Elle magazine

Hana Jirickova Topless Euro Space Age For the Frenchy Version of Elle

 
Hana Jirickova Topless in Elle France May 2014
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If you happen to love your fashion models super Czech and super hot and just a tad bit topless and perfectly funbagged, then prepare to dig Hana Jirickova in the French version of Elle where ta-ta’s are often unfurled if for no other reason than to laugh at the Puritanical Americans. I’m as patriotic as the next guy, but if European magazines want to stick it to our extreme modesty by way of exhibiting all their models without their tops on, then I’m prepared to suffer their indignant taunts. Especially when it means more girls like Hana flashing their hotness with a taste of sweet bare teat, like sweet icing on the world’s most fappable cake.

Oh, sure, the tween-aged street bullies do taunt me when my Elle arrives at the front stoop. But how I taunt them back with the satisfaction of flipping through a women’s fashion magazine loaded with barely dressed hotties. That’s not really taunting I suppose, but there are so many of those little rapscallion skateboard artists around my place, I have to be careful. Hana, welcome to Egotastic! Enjoy.

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Bar Refaeli Covered Topless and Just Wicked Wicked Hot in Elle Spain

I don’t remember when I first fell deep into lust with Bar Refaeli. I do not foresee a day when those very romantic and pure of heart feelings will ever subside. Bar, I’m here for the duration, don’t leave me hanging. And speaking of hanging, the ever so slightly demure Israeli supermodel held her own perfect pair of funbags for this otherwise mostly nekkid spread in Elle Spain.

While I full intend to pull of the perfect BBQ this coming holiday weekend, I have to be totally honest and say it will always be less than perfect until the day Bar is going naughty things to me underneath my ‘Lick My Cook’ apron. That is the summer holiday dream I’ve had since the last millennium. Bar, you make me so happy with your scantily clad looks, but there’s so many more levels of pleasure for us to explore. Call me, I’m making ribs. Enjoy.

Bar Refaeli Is Barely Covered Topless and Just So Damn Hot

I don’t know where Bar Refaeli runs off to when she disappears for months at a time. I like to imagine it’s some North Pole like Superman fortress, but this one containing a council of super hot women that make lots of important worldly decisions and then have nekkid pillow fights.

More importantly, be sure to check out Bar Refaeli wicked hot and nearly topless over on WWTDD. I promise you, you will not be left saying, man, I should’ve done more hard work today instead of checking out Bar. Enjoy.

Lais Ribeiro Drip Dry Swimsuit Hotness for Elle

Lais Ribeiro is another helpful reminder that Brazil is destined to be my future home when I retire and intend to surround myself with beautiful beach babes and friendly drug lords who can get me the good cigars. Lais doesn’t really even seem to be trying all that hard to look so desperately smoking hot in her one-piece swimsuits on the pages of Elle magazine.

I’m not sure when that sandy bare butt thing became in pictorial vogue once more, but I’m certainly glad it’s back. I love a messy thumper on a sultry hot woman. They call me, The Cleaner. No hands. Enjoy.

Miranda Kerr See-Through Tops Reveal A Newly Single Woman Doing More Than Good

Miranda Kerr seems to be doing fine. We just had to show you her full range of tanned and fine divorcee looks in the current edition of Vogue Spain, wherein the Aussie once-more single lady shows why see-through tops and being super good looking are enough to make any man weak in the knees.

When Miranda married, we were concerned. When she produced a child, I nearly cried. No, not out of joy. But the fact remains that the sextastic is a very powerful and all-abiding force in this universe. It’s far less fragile and fleeting as one might think. Girls like Miranda with the powers of uber lust inducement never really fade away, in most cases, life’s little hiccups only make them look that much better. Case in point, check out these photos of her Miranda’s sweet tempting funbags peeking through her tops. She’s not lost a single step. Enjoy.

Miley Cyrus Legs and Some Kind of Fashion for Elle

I wouldn’t exactly call Miley Cyrus a fashion plate, unless it be the fashion of furry stripper costumes she flaunts onstage, or less in many of her public appearancesoffstage. Still, the good folks at Elle magazine want in on the Miley traffic wave as much as the next periodical, so they’re featuring a distant gazed Miley in some kind of leggy get up in their latest edition.

Miley Cyrus has certainly taught all of us that have fame will travel. She’s also taught us, and hopefully the rest of sextastic celebrity land that you actually can show off nekkid and even raunchy and mainstream well-paying culture will still well-pay you and treat you like a star. So many of our lovely ladies remain in fear of this fact. Good for Miley I say again. She’s once more proving that prudery gets you nowhere. Enjoy.

Emma Watson Is So Grown Up I Want to Cry

Oh, Hermione, how the years fly by watching you, appropriately and from a distance, go from awkward teen ingenue, to less appropriately, Emma Watson, the grown model actress 20-something in various ladies magazines I routinely pilfer from the hair salon.

Emma’s latest and greatest beauty portraiture can be seen in the new edition of Elle magazine, which is the U.S. version so no nekkid fun bits, but still all Emma hotness. She really is a vision of hotness. Someday, soon, she will shun these material objects known as clothes and do a proper sitting, and, on that day, my head will freaking explode. Still, I’d do that deal. C’mon, Emma. Enjoy.