Jessica Alba

Jessica Alba Licking Ice Cream With Smooshed Boobs in the Big Apple

Wow, that title sounds like something I'd like to order up on a futuristic virtual reality offering in my hotel room someday. But, true to form, with the start of summer, uber-sextastic Jessica Alba proceeded to delightfully lick an ice cream cone whilst promenading in New York. To add a little extra to the scene, Jessica wore a dress top that smooshed her boobs into forms I can only describe as what I would imagine they would look like if I had larger hands and permission.

If you had any doubt that summer truly is the most sextastic season, just see how it's kicking off. Alba tongue and smooshed boobs. Now that's a season I can get behind. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba and Katherine Webb Form a Dynamic Cleavetastic Duo at Spike Guys Choice Awards

My friend Calvin Dictamotta summed it up for all of us early in 7th grade when he declared that you knew a girl was attractive if you wanted to see her nekkid. While that seemed to be enough for most of the pack, that left me with a definition of 'attractive' that encompassed nearly the entire female world. Not that I didn't have some preferences, but nary a woman walks by and I don't think, I'd really like to see her nekkid. Calvin's pronouncement proved useless. Though it is certainly on my mind today seeing Jessica Alba and Katherine Webb at the Spike Guy's Choice Awards over the weekend.

While there are a decent bunch of celebrity hotties at the event, the uber-sextastic Jessica Alba and the fresh-body on the scene Katherine Webb, both looked ridiculously hot, flashing cleavage, and capturing the attention of every living human being with functioning gonads at the event. Did I want to see them nekkid? Oh, yes, believe I did. Ergo, these are two attractive ladies. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba See-Through Bra! Hello Jessica Alba Boobs!

Wow, I'm not sure what possessed Jessica Alba, the uber-sextastic mother of two, to choose this particular revealing outfit for Manhattan Spring stroll, but I'm ever so glad she did. Some very nice peeks at Jessica's glorious peaks pretty much bare to the good parts. Oh, happy days.

Jessica Alba has been dressing so conservative of late I wasn't sure we'd ever see anything like this ever again. And, yes, I cried a little thinking those dark thoughts. But I turned recently to positive thoughts only. The power of positive thinking is tremendous. Though not nearly as epic as Jessica's bare mommy potatoes. Mmm. Potatoes. Enjoy.

Katie Holmes Sideboob, Jessica Alba Cleave, and Miley Cyrus’ Annie Lennox Look Highlight the 2013 Met Gala

Nice to see my girl Katie Holmes back in the mix, flashing some skin by way of sideboob at the fancy pants 2013 Met Gala last night in New York. The Met Gala is one of the biggest highfalutin celebrity events of the year, with a ton of A-listers showing up in their designer gowns for the Big Apples biggest red carpet.

Besides Katie we couldn't help but notice Miley Cyrus calling upon an 80's Euro-pop vibe, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Alba showing some cleave, Kate Beckinsale, Taylor Swift, and a bunch of other top tier celebs showing off their finest. It's kind of like the very first sequence in a recurring R.E.M. sleep fantasy of mine, the one right before the the robbers break in and force all the girls to hand over their fancy frocks. I could tell you what happens next, but this is a family site. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba So Hot and Not Without Earning It

In the online magazine Net-a-Porter, Jessica Alba mentions that she aided her bodies recovery to hotness weight after baby birth by binding herself day and night in tight corsets. As Jessica confirms, this was a painful process. Seems a bit savage really, and not that I approve of any woman torturing herself outside of standard Pilates and starvation techniques to improve her looks just for us, but... Jessica does look pretty damn amazing.

Again, ladies, please, don't hurt yourselves. No dying for good looks and all that nonsense that leads to unhealthy diets and 9 hour a day workouts. In fact, we here at Egotastic! do quite adore the curvy ladies. Having said that, once you are feeling good about your shape, please do show us what you get to see in the mirror each morning. That's not a request, that's a beg. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba Long Legs and Cleavage for Glamour

Jessica Alba is on something of a roll this week, what with her faptastic bikini picture parade out of St. Bart's, and now an amazing pictorial spread in Glamour U.K. featuring the mommy hottie flashing her shapely legs and just enough cleavage to be dangerous. Well, dangerous to us and our wanton ways. I'm sure Jessica is the height of innocence and proper MILF behavior. Except for that occasional wry smile, that let's us know there's still a little naughty in those hills.

And, while you're at it, why not double down on Alba hotness with this new Mike Rosenthal shoot of Jessica Alba. If she were my mom, I'd suggest moving to a state where people were enlightened on the matter of family love. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba Bikini Pictures of Epic Hotness from 3-Day St. Bart’s Weekend

Today, the heavens shine truly upon us as we give thanks for the gift of relatively decent eyesight. The anatomical sensation that allows us to feast our desirous eyeballs upon Jessica Alba bikini pictures the likes of which we weren't sure we'd ever see again. But, as we always say, there's no containing the sextastic. It can not be caged or restrained or buried, not permanently. It's a beacon of  sweet body goodness as evidenced by Jessica Alba over not one, not two, but three days of bikini- clad killer MILFtastic hotness down in the Caribbean.

Is this heaven? We're only missing the milk and cookies and the accidentally misplaced bikini top. Enjoy.