Jessica Alba

Jessica Alba Million Dollar Cleavage Smile in Times Square

By Bill Swift | September 12, 2012 @ 2:54 pm

Jessica Alba Shines on the Set of 'Extra' in Times Square

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Jessica Alba just about anything is enough to send our fire hydrants into spray-the-block mode, but you put her in a body hugging, low cut dress and we're just about to order an evacuation of the neighborhood, for the safety of the children, natch.

Jessica was taut and hot and green all over for her appearance on Extra filming in Times Square today and she looked all kinds of million dollar smiley and happy and making us with that we could keep staring into her eyes as we casually found the tiny zipper on the back of her dress (hate those damn tiny women's dress zippers). Of course, in the heat of passion, decent chance we'd just bite most of it off of her. Jessica still has it and then some. And we still want it. Enjoy.

JESSICA JUST LOOKS NATURALLY STEAMY

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Jessica Alba Dances and Sweats For Great Bodi-Ness

By Bill Swift | September 4, 2012 @ 8:33 am

Jessica Alba Attends Pilates Dance Class in West Hollywood

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$28 worth of fruit-flavored berry drinks? Check. Expensive designer handbag? Check. $80 t-shirt? Check. Cell phone to call personal assistant to remind her to re-fill your fruit-flavored berry drink packs? Check.

Jessica Alba had the perfect celebrity gym workout paraphernalia good to go for a Pilates dance workout in Hollywood, but, more importantly, she brought along the Jessica Alba MILFtastic looks and body, hidden behind those oversized sunglasses. All warm and sweaty and pouty making us wish that we were the guy who hands her her wipe-down towels after the workout (I know there's not really a guy like that, but in our dreams, it's our job).

Perfection comes with a price, and that price is Jessica sweating hard. Thankfully, our price is just the time spent leering. We'll do that deal. Enjoy.

JESSICA ALBA HAS BEEN DONNING THE STRETCH PANTS MORE AND MORE, MMMM

Jessica Alba Stretch Pants at Her Office

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Jessica Alba Had a Gun and She Wasn’t Afraid to Use It

By Bill Swift | August 27, 2012 @ 8:58 am

Jessica Alba Goes to the Shooting Range in Tight Jeans in LA

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Well, okay, outside the gun range Jessica Alba merely had a little pink pocket book, a fruity iced tea, and a pair of hot tight pants that got us feeling tingly, but make no mistake about it, this woman is a killer.

When a wife starts visiting the gun range, we always get a little nervous for the husband, Cash Warren in this case. And since we've sort of kind of predicted that that til-death-do-us-part promise between the two would not last super long, now we're kind of wondering if Jessica intends to end it in a quick fashion of sorts, kind of a snub-nosed split. It's not that we don't think wives and girlfriends should own and shoot firearms, it's just that we know what our last lady did to us with a Coors Light can after she caught us spying on her sister changing into her bikini and, well, real bullets hurt worse than even the silver kind.

Nevertheless, a hot woman with a gun does hold its allure. When that woman is Jessica Alba in a tank top and tight jeans, well, we'd let her shoot an apple off of our swollen head, as it were. Enjoy.

JESSICA ALBA HAS ALWAYS HAD A LOVE GUN SET TO KILL

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Jessica Alba, Short Skirt, Engage Fantasies

By Bill Swift | August 21, 2012 @ 9:32 am

Jessica Alba Shows Off Legs in a Short Skirt on Hollywood Blvd

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The fantasy tipping point for various women really depends on their starting point. Eventually, given enough time, boredom, idle hands, a man will fantasize about any woman within his viewing or imagining spectrum. Case in point, three hours into my wait at the DMV last month, I had myself mentally in a place where I was undressing the large lady behind counter #12B and gently caressing the large mole on her cheek as I unbuttoned her polyester muumuu type garb.

On the other end of the spectrum, the super sextastic like Jessica Alba, well it doesn't take much to coax the male mind into fantasy land, say, just a short skirt as the hot model and actress strutted down Hollywood Blvd. for another one of her important business meetings. The libido is already steps ahead of you in imagining a dropped purse with a bend to retrieve, a hand gently working it's way up the thigh toward the ultimate Alba prize.

With Jessica Alba in a short skirt, that fantasy tipping point is already halfway toward virtual scoring. Enjoy.

A PEEK UP JESSICA ALBA'S SKIRT IS LIKE A GLIMPSE INTO CHEEK HEAVEN

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Jessica Alba Is a Serious Business Woman in Seriously Tight Jeans

By Bill Swift | August 17, 2012 @ 8:06 am

Jessica Alba Wearing Skin Tight Jeans in Beverly Hills

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What people really need to understand is that Jessica Alba is no longer simply an object d'lust and super fine piece of eye-candy, she's now an object d'lust and super fine piece of eye-candy making important phone calls. She's got an Internet business to run. Serious decisions to be made. Orders to be given. So the idea that you can now merely gawk at her tight-jean covered arse and imagine the possibilities of the wonderful warm bumps thereunder, well, you'll now have to make an appointment for that.

And I happen to have her booty booked in the conference room most the this morning. You can have the afternoon. Enjoy.

JESSICA ALBA'S BODY WILL ALWAYS BE OUR BUSINESS

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Jessica Alba Hot Mom Flashing Her Bra in the Park

By Bill Swift | August 7, 2012 @ 12:19 am

Oh, Jessica, You're Killing Me

Jessica Alba Flashing Black Sports Bra Under Her Dress

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Jessica Alba is many things, at least, in my mind she is a lion tamer, a sadistic dentist, and a poorly-sighted naturist with a rip in the backside of her pants she doesn't recognize. But, above all else, she is one smoking hot mom.

The MILFtastic Jessica Alba took her brood of offspring we'd so desperately like to add to for a day at the park and flashed a little of her sports bra under her top, just to make sure that every dude in the park building sand castles with his kid could feel the uncomfortability automatically sensed by any dude at the park feeling warm around the lower knuckles. This is why men do not belong at parks with hot moms. It's too natural. Enjoy.

BABIES HAVE BEEN VERY GOOD TO JESSICA ALBA'S CLEAVAGE

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Jessica Alba Getting Closer to Public Displays of Pure Sexiness

By Bill Swift | August 3, 2012 @ 10:32 am

Jessica Alba in a Low Cut Top at a Studio in Los Angeles

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MILFtastic fantastic Jessica Alba is back from her photoshoot and back at work in L.A. making oodles and oodles of Internet cash pimping globe-friendly and safe baby products. And, speaking of babies, Jessica is beginning to show more and more of her fantastic milkers, in progressively lower cut tops just out and about in her adopted hometown.

Sometimes, a little chest goes a long way. Of course, a lot of chest goes a much longer way. Just saying, Jessica, throw us a boneob. Enjoy.