While spending the day barbecuing and perhaps having a beer or three and always, always remembering the sacrifice of our men and women serving in the Armed Forces, past and present, I’d by lying if I didn’t say I was once more following one of my nineteen healthy addictions of sextastic celebrity videos online. I can’t seem to shake the habit, mostly because I have no desire to shake the habit. Seeing my favorite lovely MILFs and models in hardly any clothing in video form is simply one of my favorite pastimes. I feel no shame, though a lovely warmth in my cockles.
Today I’ve been peeking at impossibly hot veteran wonder-muffin Jennifer Lopez and her still so wicked alluring body, Paris Hilton preening and crawling in her new sort of music video, Zoe Kravitz crazy bikini hot for GQ, Doutzen Kroes bikini takeover of Cannes, and Miley Cyrus wearing nothing but butterflies candidly recorded in a recent venue. Some swell lovelies posing and posturing skin for the cameras. Sure, eat your dogs and your burgers, but save a little room for a dessert of visual passion. Enjoy.
I got so many positive responses last week to my little bit about what I was watching online on a Sunday evening, I decided to give you my list again. Granted, the bulk of that positive response came in emails from my Uncle Steve followed by, can you help me out with a few bucks, but I like to think his compliments were independently valid. I like sharing. It makes me feel like I’m part of a global campaign to help people see more hot women. If the UN had any legitimacy, I would already be named an ambassador.
As to what I’ve been watching the past several hours, well, how about Candice Swanepoel oiled and glittery booty, Beyonce bikini body hot in her Standing on the Sun video, Stephanie Pratt showing off like a naughty schoolgirl for the Brits, and Doutzen Kroes teasing in black lingerie and stockings. As you can tell, my tastes are diverse. I invite you to share in my virtual playlist. Enjoy.
Doutzen Kroes in a swimsuit is a thing. Doutzen Kroes bending over forward and back in the same swimsuit, that’s a big thing. This perfect piece of Victoria’s Secret modeling sextastic looks spectacular in any old bit of rag, but linger or swimsuits are where she makes her bones, not to mention those of many a gentleman ogler along the beach. A few years back Doutzen quietly slipped from hottie into MILFtastic land without missing a single beat or hint of visual wonderment. Her amazing body and alluring looks and a booty that simply is small and powerful adds up to a whole greater than any sum of its parts. I’m sure she’s here mostly to play with her kids. But they had their turn on her teat. How about stepping aside you selfish creatures and letting some of us beseechers have a go. Your mommy belongs to the world. Someday you’ll understand. Enjoy.Photo Credit: PacificCoastNews
In honor of all the things I lust, like hot MILFs and lingerie and swimsuit models changing on the beach, well, Doutzen Kroes went and nearly did it again with barely an inch or so of blanket covering her swollen lovely mams from the sight of our ogling eyes on the beach in Miami changing for a thong swimsuit thingamajig. It was enough to remind me why sleeping overnight on the public beach pays off. You’re in before they put up that silly cordoned off tape.
And, don’t you know, it’s been six years almost to the date since we first fell madly in passion with Doutzen Kroes, pre-mommy years, when she posed topless for V magazine. I know, time flies when you’re leering at ridiculously hot women’s melons. But, oh, how we did become entranced that day. I invited you to re-feel those feelings of warmth once again. Enjoy.
I’m not sure what Doutzen Kroes was modeling exactly on the beach in Miami. Not precisely what I would choose for the Victoria’s Secret angel and MILFtastic hottie, but at least they were kind enough to leave her precious booty exposed to the sun and wind and gentleman ogler’s gaze.
Doutzen Kroes is working steadily once more which is a wonderful thing for those of us in the Doutzen Kroes Sextastic Appreciation Society who need our regular fill of Doutzen in various stages of showoff mode. Though I might have gone for a bikini or less and perhaps maybe just shot the entire thing in my abode while covering Doutzen’s booty in whipped cream cheese. But that’s just me, what do I know about staging. This is nice too. Just, you know, second best. Bless you, Doutzen. Enjoy.
The Wall Street Journal isn’t exactly the place I go to first for my hot girl photo needs. Though the comics are hilarious. Though vastly underrated hottie Doutzen Kroes and her MILFtastic allure lead me to believe I need to add this to my list of a thousand daily portals to peep. Wow. I mean, wow, this Victoria’s Secret angel makes me want to shed a tear or joy mixed with sorrow mixed with a decent amount of the vodka I overindulged in at lunch. I’m old school.
Doutzen Kroes doesn’t need lots of fancy staging or production value or wardrobe for that matter. She’s just a classic beauty with the visual wonderments of a natural born goddess. I’m partially complimenting her so she’ll look kindly on the pleading letters I write her to leave her DJ husband and run away with a blogger. Let’s face it, DJ is like the only job title that falls below blogger in the natural order. No offense, people with iPods and cool bracelets. Enjoy.