Courtney Stodden

Courtney Stodden Bikini Pictures Twirl and Flip and Flash Some Major League Ta-Ta’s

By Bill Swift | March 5, 2014 @ 1:52 pm

Courtney Stodden Bikini Cartwheeling on a Beach in LA

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The cartwheel always eluded me as a child, you know, when I still did hopscotch and jacks and my mom insisted my name was Renee. Ah, grade school. So I'm not going to hate on Courtney Stodden, who even with her monumental enhancements managed to pull off a full and relatively decent cartwheel along the beach just to make sure anybody who wasn't already staring at her ginormous funbags in a tiny bikini got a full and pleasant look.

Courtney is trying very hard to get noticed. I know many of you will tell me I'm part of the problem or some cliche like that for giving her attention. But I only share with you where my eyes go. If I was a automobile reporter, you'd see lots of high end vehicles, you'd also see the spectacular crashes. My mind is simple. It moves toward shiny objects. Feel free to go ahead and find your hot celebrity yabbos on PBS if you want intelligence. Enjoy.

COURTNEY HAS NOT EXACTLY BECOME DEMURE SINCE HER SIZE-UPS

Courtney Stodden Big Boobs in Low Cut Dress at the WOWie Awards

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Courtney Stodden Spares No Cleavage For Night of 100 Stars

By Bill Swift | March 4, 2014 @ 10:41 am

Courtney Stodden Shows Cleavage at 100 Stars Oscar Viewing Party

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I'll say this about Courtney Stodden. She's hard to miss at a party. Even a party of 100 stars, with that definition of 'star' being perhaps a bit on the liberal side. Nevertheless, Courtney seemed to be getting most of the gentleman ogler leering eyes pointed toward her fun-sized yabbos.

Courtney has been trying to get herself out in public as much as possible, to boost her career doing whatever it is she does. Going back to blonde may return all cameras in her direction, not to mention the sheer gravitational force of her biggun' cans. She's trying hard. I think that deserves some credit. If not a two handed squeeze with motorboat maintenance. Keep at it, Courtney. I think we're getting closer. Enjoy.

P.S. Yes, that's Courtney's mom in the see-through top in the third picture. Apple, tree, you know.

COURTNEY DIDN'T BUY THOSE NEW MELONS TO BE HIDDEN

Courtney Stodden Takes Off Her Bikini Top on the Beach

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Courtney Stodden Goes Back to Blonde, Keeps the Funbags

By Bill Swift | February 19, 2014 @ 9:13 am

Courtney Stodden Shows Off Cleavage and Her New Blonde Hair

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If there's one thing I know you care about, it's what hair color Courtney Stodden is choosing for her current look. Well, I'm here to announce that she's officially gone back to platinum blonde after a multi-month run as a brunette, which actually seemed to be popular among most people I talked to, but that's not a statistical sampling.

In any event, she has clearly decided to keep the ginormous funbags completely the same, showing them off in their nearly full bounty at the salon where the media world waited in bated breath to see her hair coloring treatment. I'm not exactly sure what Courtney is up to these days, I just know she's doing it with her chest hanging out. It's not a bad constant Enjoy.

COURTNEY TRIED BRUNETTE AND COVERED TOPLESS FOR A GOOD WHILE

Courtney Stodden Covered Topless in Skimpy Black Lingerie

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Courtney Stodden Bikini Beach Sports Partaking and Parading in the Tiny Two-Piece

By Bill Swift | January 31, 2014 @ 9:06 am

Courtney Stodden Shows Off Her Sporty Side in a Bikini in LA

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Word is, Courtney Stodden has finalized her physical and otherwise separation from her long lasting marriage to her dad's older uncle's oldest best friend's dad. She's now officially and undoubtedly single again. To celebrate, Courtney Stodden took her curves and her bikini and her football and hit the beach with some guy we couldn't possibly cared about if we tried, so we cut him out of the silly, but racktastic photos of Courtney who is certainly improving upon her beach posing skill set.

Back in the day, when Courtney was just a teen, I mean, a younger teen, she had some awkward attempts at pulling off California beach girl. She seems to have it down pretty keen these days, including the thong bikini, the half-shirt, and the football. If you look like you're in a beer commercial, you're on the right track. Say what you will about Courtney Stodden, she's improving. Enjoy.

COURTNEY'S FIRST BEACH POSE DOWNS WERE A BIT STILTED

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Courtney Stodden Shows Off Her Killer Kongs for Date Night in Hollywood

By Bill Swift | January 28, 2014 @ 12:00 pm

Courtney Stodden Big Cleavage in a Black Dress in West Hollywood

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Courtney Stodden is nineteen and single, or about to be, and she's wasting little time getting back out there into the hot L.A. singles market with her sense of demure style and low-key wardrobe. Or, perhaps the opposite.

I mostly feel bad for Courtney's date, who has to sit through dinner pretending not to stare at her ginormous hooters. We've all been there before, perhaps to a lesser circumference degree, but all the same, it can get awkward trying not to gaze awkwardly into such exposed expansive orbs. Gravity alone will draw the iris toward second base. Were I on a date with Courtney, I might employ my trick of referring to her biggish funbags as her sisters. For instance, 'And would your sisters like a drink as well? Wait, are they legal yet?. Then we'd have a good laugh while I imagined entering the Motorboat Hall of Fame after dessert. Enjoy.

COURTNEY HAS NOT BEEN SHY ABOUT SHOWING OFF HER NEW BEST FRIENDS

Courtney Stodden Shows Cleavage in a Tight Blue Leather Dress in LA

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Courtney Stodden Barely Covered Topless Racy Brunette Photos for the Brits to Munch On

By Bill Swift | January 3, 2014 @ 10:45 am

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You know Courtney Stodden make quite an impression on the people of Jolly Old England when she was visiting there for her turn on Celebrity Big Brother. How could she not win over the people of Britain with her great, um, personalities, which she managed to flash glimpses of during the show's run. Now, the lads magazines in the U.K. have invited Courtney back to get almost almost topless as a brunette in a racy lingerie photoshoot.

I'm not exactly sure how Courtney's massive globes aren't fully exposed, but I suppose they did some selective combing of the hair and choosing of the photos to retain her ingenue innocence. It is her last token of down home country girl remaining, one we expect to see very shortly. For now, Courtney making quite the funbag impression in a land where bodacious brunettes are highly revered. Enjoy.

COURTNEY HAS BEEN POPPING OUT BIG TIME SINCE HER SEPARATION

Courtney Stodden Upskirt and Boobs in a Tiny Dress at Pop Fashion and Sport Event

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Courtney Stodden Boobs Elicit a Wowie from Even the Most Veteran of Gawkers

By Bill Swift | December 16, 2013 @ 8:33 am

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I'm not a particularly busy man, but even at that, I'm too occupied with naps and evading my landlord to figure out what the WOWie Awards are. Suffice it to say, on name alone, I'm not shocked that Courtney Stodden was a recipient. The former blonde shellbomb has turned her locks to a raven brunette, but has kept her flesh puppies very much the same, here and nearly bare and in your face.

Courtney is now a single nineteen year old young woman, so, naturally, she's going to flash a little cleave from time to time, or a ton of cleavage all the time, very nearly spilling out of her dress again at this award events. I must say, I prefer the brunette on Courtney, and, by brunette, I am most definitely talking about her Costco sized boobtastic. Enjoy.