Alessandra Ambrosio

Alessandra Ambrosio Bikini Pictures Are Holy Crap Kinds of Hot and MILFtastic

Alessandra Ambrosio is simply coming into her own, and into our own naughty minds, as one of the single most wicked hot moms in all of Hottieville. It's definitely the blessed combination of her natural good looks, that wicked worked-out body, and her willingness to put it in all kinds of under-the-sun sextastic poses, none more alluring than her twisting, bumping, and bending contortions on the sand over the weekend playing beach volleyball.

Super hot slender mom in a white bikini spraying herself with suntan lotion; I almost passed out from the ogling heat.

Oh, and earlier in the day, ridiculously hot Alessandra took the kids to the Beverly Hills pumpkin patch and ran into Jessica Alba with her own brood. Talk about a casual meeting of the MILFtastic. All we could think about was reaching into a pumpkin and feeling that gooey slippery goodness. Only, we weren't really thinking about a pumpkin. MILF overload! Enjoy.

Alessandra Ambrosio Legs Might Just Be the Best in the Ogling Business

Hot mommy Alessandra Ambrosio and her legs will not be denied as they continue their daily show around Los Angeles, in short little skirts or today, cut-off shorts, flashing the gams to allow gentleman oglers a ful toe to head appreciation party for this native Brazilian turned American MILF.

A little bra flash here, a lot of leg flashing there, and this forever beach-going or shopping on the Avenues young mom is going to cause some serious accidents among male onlookers (and don't tell me many of you ladies aren't admiring equally as strong). Enjoy.

Mandy Moore, Ali Larter, Kaley Cuoco, and Alessandra Ambrosio Provide the Heat at Veuve Clicquot Polo Classic

Back in middle school the most popular girl in school, the perfectly Nordic formed beauty Anna Spanx hosted a Power Rangers makeout party and made a publicly dramatic gesture about handing out invitations to the chosen few, though not so few that it seemed like the entire homeroom class, less yours truly, received her precious pink folded note card invitation. Scorned by the obvious exclusion, I finally found the recently descended sack to confront the gorgeous young Anna about my omission from her popularity party list. She was a blunt girl, being both very pretty and rather lacking in intellectual faculties. Anna informed me that she didn't invite me because it was creepy how I was always trying to peek down her top at her burgeoning female developments and that she didn't want me around all her friends at her party. I took the news rather hard, if for no other reason than to discover I was not as sly a peeker as I had previously thought. Despite my designation as socially unacceptable, Anna was ultimately a very practical girl with solid understanding of her future and told me to meet her behind the science building at recess and for $5 she'd let me get a good long private gander. I'd call that a win for young Egotastic!

These old feelings boiled up again this past weekend as for some odd quirk of the vaunted U.S. Postal Service (R.I.P.), my invitation to the Veuve Clicquot Polo Classic never arrived, making me wonder if that golden ticket is even sent my way in the first place?  But who would not want Egotastic! at an upscale event featuring the finest frocked ladies in town attending polo matches in fancy surroundings. I mean, it's not as if we're going to try to sneak up the proper formal dresses of the likes of Mandy Moore, Ali Larter, Kaley Cuoco, and Alessandra Ambrosio, all in attendance at the frou-frou event. It's middle school all over again, only these girls would charge much more than $5. Enjoy.

I’ve Decided I Want to Make Sloppy Alleyway Love to Alessandra Ambrosio

Yes, I've considered the options on both sides of this question, but after seeing Alessandra Ambrosio strutting about in her little short skirt at the shops in Venice this weekend, I'd have to say my long internal debate now shifts into the terrain of wanting to cover this MILF in some kind of fruity preserve and get all kinds of sticky in hard to reach places.

For the longest time I was trying to respect some boundaries: the holiness of her Hollywood almost matrimonial like modern romantic partnership, her sacred maternal bonds with her children, her moral turpitude contract provisions with Victoria's Secret, all of which I will have to throw out the door as I don the peanut butter and turn Alessandra and me's sweat body tryst into a Goobers making party.

Alessandra, pick up your phone. It's go time. Enjoy

Alessandra Ambrosio Short Shorts Celebrate the Endless Summer of Legs

The equinox may have occurred, but don't tell that to the lovely legged ladies of Hottieville who are not yet ready to put away their hard-worked Pilates perfected limbs for the Fall, not just yet, and not when they look like those beneath the short shorts of Alessandra Ambrosio.

The long and lean legged Victoria's Secret model turned an ordinary trip to PetCo into an extraordinary animal-passion inducing experience for gentleman oglers within peeping distance, by mere display of her epic gams. The Summer of Legs continues! Enjoy.

Alessandra Ambrosio Naughty Dark and Hot in Edgy Photoshoot

As you know, I'm perhaps the world's worst gambler, but can almost guarantee you that we'll be seeing Alessandra Ambrosio in the top MILF type categories for the 2012 Egotastic! Hotness Awards come later this year, because not only has Alessandra Ambrosio transitioned ever so hotly into mommy land, but she has taken on an entirely new, outgoing, spirited, and all around flirty wicked hot persona of her own that has increased her passion inducing level by a factor of approximately 5.7.

In a new evening-wear meets tiger-mama photoshoot of Alessandra by Shannon Greer, the Victoria's Secret model puts the ow in meow as she preens and bends for the camera and makes faces that might just send tingles down your frontside spine. It's alluring alright. Even with far too many clothes on. Enjoy.

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