Alessandra Ambrosio

Alessandra Ambrosio Sweaty Challenges Mila Kunis to Workout Stretch Pants Battle

By Bill Swift | August 28, 2012 @ 11:36 am

As much as we ballyhoo the invention of the stretch pants for working out and lounging ladies, there's no way the inventor of those Spandex gems could have ever imagined two super hotties such as Alessandra Ambrosio and Mila Kunis going camel toe to camel toe in a battle of sweaty post-workout sextastic celebrities.

Alessandra Ambrosio Shops in Santa Monica in Tight Workout Gear

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Mila Kunis in Workout Gear Leaving Blazing Saddles

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There's really no way for us to decide who has the superior do-ability, we couldn't possibly choose Alessandra over Mila, or vice-versa, we'd like to so badly tongue-dry each girl that it's simple outside our cognitive powers to claim one over the other. But, you're strong, so, you decide.

Which girl would you rather strip out of her moist stretch pants?

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Battle Hot Legs! Alessandra Ambrosio Stems Up Against Selena Gomez

By Bill Swift | August 27, 2012 @ 2:39 pm

It's been nothing but girl on girl fights today, of which we can never get enough. We did boobtastic and belly and now it's time for legs. It is the Summer of Legs here at Egotastic! and we had a couple fine pair of gams on display over the warm weekend courtesy of supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio who was out nabbing some ice cream in a leg-revealing something or other....

Alessandra Ambrosio Flashing Legs as She Grabs Ice Cream in Santa Monica

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...and our belusted Latina diva Selena Gomez in short shorts on the set of Parental Guidance, a film we are quite dubious about, but we have absolutely no qualms in the number of times we'd like to pull those shorts down off Selena and examine her inner voice. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez in Short Shorts on Set of 'Parental Guidance'

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Alessandra Ambrosio Has Hot Mom Legs; We Love Hot Mom Legs!

By Bill Swift | August 22, 2012 @ 11:09 am

Alessandra Ambrosio Shows Off Her Legs in Turquoise Short Shorts

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Why not celebrate the stems of our favorite MILFs? Celebrate them in pictures, in words, and, hopefully, one day, celebrate them by covering them in Nutella and working our way northward during our dining excursion.

Alessandra Ambrosio has become one super fine mom, all parts, but when she hit the streets in some blue short shorts, it seemed very clear that she wanted our attention diverted to her finely toned lower appendages, perhaps the most underrated portions on our favorite ladies, but some limber toned limbs we will now be imagining wrapped around... well, you get the general idea. Enjoy.

WHEN OUR FAVORITE HOT MOMS START SURFING, WE START DROOLING

Alessandra Ambrosio Goes Surfing in Hawaii

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Alessandra Ambrosio Beach Body Makes Motherhood Look Like a Piece of Cake(s)

By Bill Swift | July 17, 2012 @ 12:48 pm

Alessandra Ambrosio Plays Volleyball in a Black Sheer Dress on the Beach

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The past few days of Alessandra Ambrosio on the beach in Malibu have made me question my commitment to honoring the mother. I can't figure out if 'thy' means my own, or if I'm allowed to honor all moms in general, especially super hot ones who like to play on the beach like Alessandra, and if honoring includes the sub-activities of ogling, leering, drooling, and cat-calling. I hope so.

The Victoria's Secret model mom spent yet another day, this time sadly slightly covered up, showing that the birthing process need not be anything but another step toward even greater hotness, flashing her toned legs, and even spots of her tummy and asstastic through her see-through beach dress, which allowed us to confirm her MILFtastic qualifications.

Alessandra, today we honor you as the mom we'd like to...err, honor. Enjoy.

WHEN WE FIRST MET ALESSANDRA, OUR HEARTS WHEN THUMP

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Alessandra Ambrosio Hot Bikini Beach Sexy-Time Volleyball Weekend

By Bill Swift | July 9, 2012 @ 8:21 am

Alessandra Ambrosio Playing Beach Volleyball in Cut Up Shirt and Bikini

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Alessandra Ambrosio dropped a slippery dash of Brazilian heat on the beaches of Malibu this weekend as the Victoria's Secret model and super-sextastic MILF spent pretty much the entire weekend outdoors in the sun, tanning, stretching, bending, flashing, and, perhaps most importantly, playing an endless series of beach volleyball games in little tiny outfits that left little to the imagination (although that expression seems out of place for Egotastic! veterans who know that the less there is a women wears left to imagine, the more we imagine).

Alessandra Ambrosio Shows Off Her Body in a Bikini Top and Shorts

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Bikinis, cut-off short shorts, little raggedy tops, wet, sweaty, good time Alessandra Ambrosio fun. It was like witnessing a girls of summer fantasy play out in real life. This mom joins the elite crew of the MILFtastic celebrities who have not only survived motherhood, they've turned it into a wicked hot springboard for even better looks. Amazing. Hot. Enjoy.

See Alessandra on Conan »

Alessandra Ambrosio Keeps Pumping Out Babies, Keeps Getting Hotter

By Bill Swift | July 6, 2012 @ 12:39 pm

Asstastic!

Alessandra Ambrosio Shows Off Her Amazing Body on the Beach in Malibu

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I'm not exactly sure what kind of genetics allows a woman to actually get hotter looking on the beach the more children she births out of her lady hatch, but Alessandra Ambrosio has certainly got them (as opposed to my late Aunt Mildy; poor Mildy never dropped the 130 lbs she picked up north of her knees and south of her sternum she picked up having her first and only child; and we never really saw her much again after she refused to purchase two airline seats for herself, she died prematurely in a booth at Arby's, nobody noticed her for almost 48 hours, it really was quite tragic.)

The point is, how the hell does Alessandra Ambrosio look so hot not long after pushing another pup out of her uterus zip code? On the beach in Malibu yesterday, the Victoria's Secret model flashed some bottom bikini-clad cans that have me wondering just how long it'll be until baby number three arrives. If I were here husband, I'd be working on that project rather than re-staining the deck. Enjoy.

ALESSANDRA ALWAYS LOVES THE WATER, WE ALWAYS LOVE SEEING HER WET

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Alessandra Ambrosio and Her Snug Crotch Visit the Yoga Studio

By Bill Swift | June 25, 2012 @ 2:33 pm

Alessandra Ambrosio Goes to Yoga Class in Tight Stretch Pants

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Look, it's probably not very becoming of a gentleman to stare into the stretch pants naughty area of a lady, and if I ever run into any gentleman, I will be sure to remind them of this.

Thankfully, we are not bound by such traditional values. So, while we thank the blessed inventor of stretch pants, we will also ogle delightfully at the hot-mom-goes-to-yoga body of Alessandra Ambrosio, and remind ourselves that sweat stains are not actually a bad thing, in fact, they might be the best thing.

Oh, sure, the good old days were grand, but I'm having hella fun in the days when Victoria's Secret models amble down the boulevard in skin tight leggings and not much else.