Happy Hump Days are here again, the day before Thanksgiving, or two days before countless numbers of older women will be needlessly trampled to death so somebody can get twenty-five bucks off a Nintendo. Ok, semi-needlessly. Still, during this season I mostly turn my thoughts to more pleasant feelings of gratitude and thanks for those special people in my life. The very special ones like Ewa Sonnet who ever so benevolent is pouring honey onto her bodacious bare bosom to celebrate the bounty of the earth. Or something like that.
Sure, there’s peace and tranquility and sustenance and familial bonds and other swell things to pay homage to this Thanksgiving. And I will. But ever so secretly whilst dining on tryptophan and gravy, I will be thinking of Ewa’s glorious rack and the real meaning of the holiday dedicated entirely to thanks. Huzzah!
As Playboy remakes itself in many different bold and boobtastic ways. you can expect to see much more of the natural naughtiness so many of you clamor for in your regular crayon-smudged letters to me. Less of the shiny happy inflated ladies perhaps, and more of supremely alluring models like Lindsay Jones. Oh, Lindsay, how you have started my engines, greased my rods, and insert other naughty sounding auto metaphor herein.
Gobble Gobble. One Week Free Playboy.TV For Being Super Pilgrim!
Our friends at PlayboyPlus are touting their latest Bunny creation, the sultry Ms. Jones, as the wave of the future. I’d do more than wave if Lindsay were part of my future, if you know what I mean. Whoa, baby hit me one more time. Just say the word, Lindsay, and I will empty my bank account, liquidate my stocks, and sell off all my holdings and we’ll see how far $172.57 can get two crazy horny young lovers in an Enterprise rent-a-car. I’m so so ready. Enjoy.
When the Siamese triplets who run my IT department told me I needed to test out our new system I immediately went to thoughts of big luscious lovely chest pillows. And since Jessica Davies seems happily intent on documenting her own preciously feathery set, I thought, why not make this an experiment of digital technology. I am pretty sure this is why the Internet was invented in the first place.
Jessica Davies seems particularly pleased with her plump and juicy peaches. If I had Funions like Jessica, I’d probably take five minutes out of my eighteen hour a day bubble bath schedule to visually brag about my yum yums as well. I consider it the highest order of charity, something just beyond anonymous acts of generosity. The sharing of the boobtastic selfies. It’s what hottie saints are made of. Enjoy.
Okay, perhaps Chelsea Handler didn’t post more topless pictures of herself to social media just to celebrate our upgrade to WordPress circa 2013. Which by the way when you’re upgrading from 2008 is pretty monumental. Like Chelsea’s funbags, we are doing our best to stay upright and shipshape.
You may notice some wonkiness in the next 24 hours on the site. This is all normal and natural and no need for you to call the authorities or down even more Cosby cocktails to calm your nerves. Everything will be fine. In fact, better than fine when we unleash the power of 2013. Don’t you remember how fast you were last year? Indeed. The upgrade will allow us to unlock the mysteries of mobile and tablet and embedded videos and improved user experiences. Also, more boobs. You gotta have more boobs.
Mother Nature had a laugh when she gave me the technical know how of a slow chimp. But I’ve vowed to be more tech forward than my grandfather who cried when he first saw indoor plumbing. You try squatting over a bucket for the first nineteen years of your life and tell me you wouldn’t shed a tear yourself. All good things on the horizon.
Assuming for a moment you don’t get HBO Brazil, you’re perhaps missing some of the best topless television in the world. O Negocio, which I’m told roughly translates to The Business, runs on the channel down Sudamericana way and just unfurls in each episode some of the finest funbags on the boob tube anywhere. So, I thought I’d share. The ladies of Season 2 alone are a mouthful and a half. Maybe you could use a hand or something. Just super fine Brazilian thespianic vixens constantly making the sexy for the purpose of advancing the story line.
Take a look and see if you don’t fall in lust as well with this largely unknown HBO number. Enjoy.
Here’s what I love about the Spanish. Well, it’s not just one thing, but one more thing. Interviu magazine just named matured-themed film star Susy Gala as the best asstastic on the Iberian peninsula. That’s very liberal minded of them. Many countries might ding an adult star because of her more extensive work in the erotic arts, but Spain sees a job as a job and a booty as a booty and forgoes all the judging. I can’t imagine any U.S. magazines would do the same in their hottie naming lists. In fact, they almost entirely specifically exclude adult entertainers, even though several of them are well beyond good looking. Not all, but some.
So bravo Spains, Interviu, and most of all Susy Gala, whose more profound work I’m sure I can share with you in some measure, though for now, just her killer female form in her acceptance speech pictorial. It’s a mighty fine thumper. Si, Senor! Enjoy.
Okay, Susy at her day job:
Now the faux bottled water company has gone and done it. Straight up bare boobtastic from Swedish model Ela Rose in the pimping pursuit of merching the H20. How unseemly. And, yes, always pretty darn awesome. I’m still not buying any water, but I am going to consider the affects of water on the bikini bottom clad Ela as she promenades across the Southern California shoreline with her especially perfect funbags moist in the chilly autumn breeze. You know when I use the word ‘autumn’ I’m kind of in lust.
I’m not exactly sure where this bottled water campaign is headed business wise. I only know it has taken a turn for the better in the visual wonderments departments. Perhaps they should sell photos instead of…. hey, wait a minute. Enjoy.