Sultry vixen Bai Ling wore a very provocative outfit to a movie premiere. It’s so weird it’s hard to describe. Basically she wore a strip of cloth over her ginormous funbags and a see-through skirt that has a big red flower over her…um…lady flower. The result is some sideboob for the ages. In fact, it’s all kinds of boob, top, bottom, side, and cleavage. The only thing missing is the nips…barely. Bai Ling has a spectacular rack. They are the kind of boobies that might give a man carpal tunnel syndrome from handling them too much. I’m personally willing to take that risk. She’s also got some phenomenal legs which you can see in their entirety since, as I said, her skirt is see-through and she’s not wearing any underwear. You know, besides a flower.
That’s the thing about Bai Ling. She’s always going to do something whacky and sexy to get attention. That’s fine by me. I don’t mind attention seeking behavior if there is plenty of sideboob.
Bai Ling, Sideboob
It’s called symbiosis. Chrissy Teigen loves to bare her braless sweater puppies as much as decently if not legally possible during her Manhattan jaunts. We love to leer endlessly and pretend we’ll be cupping those sweet teats later in an adulterous bubble bath at the Plaza. That might be a pretend specific to my own thoughts, you create your own.
Chrissy found a sideboob cleavy revealing top for a simple promenade in the Big Apple that allowed us to righteously declare once more, sextastic girl with one fine fun parts. The Eurasian alluring model has always tugged at our lower heart strings. Now that she’s been in the public eye more thanks to her high profile marriage and SI cover, we get to delight in Chrissy’s passion inducing skills that much more. She seems very much up to the task. Now, it’s time for us to do our part. Enjoy.
I think Lady Gaga goes through about 478 costume changes during her 90 minute Art Pop concert performance. That’s a costume change about every second seconds making it impossible for her to do anything but slip in and out of elaborate wardrobe right there on stage. As Gaga did in Milan, baring her top with her back turned momentarily to the crowd to get into yet another crazy colorful look that seems to delight her fans to no end. As for us gentlemen oglers, we’ll peek at the funbags of one of the most famous women in the world simply because that’s our sworn duty as stated in our online certificates.
Lady Gaga may not be everybody’s cup of tea. But along with a few other well known exhibitionist divas, she has helped to raise the bar on the almost mandates showing of skin and booty shaking in thongs for modern female pop stars. If you ignore the musical content, this show-woman-ship phenomenon has been a really good thing. Pop stars have historically gone for the sextastic alluring showy look, but there’s never been anything so blatantly sexual and erotic as it is today. I’m not sure if that’s good or bad for the kids. I know it’s great for me. I’ll leave the social scientists to figure out the kid angle. Enjoy.
Bai Ling knows how to get into character. Also how to get into minimal clothing. You combine the two and the Chinese American thespianic provided blood flow to thousands of nerds over the weekend at the Comikaze convention here in Los Angeles. How hot was Bai Ling? Hot enough that I nearly ventured into the nerd swarm just to see her. Thankfully, somebody I trust slapped me back into reality before I headed out. I remain among the uncontaminated.
Bai Ling really does like to make a sextastic spectacle of herself. She was waving swords and posing and preening in extreme positions in her exhibitionist costume to the point that oxygen masks dropped from the ceiling and geeks had to slip elastic bands over the elastic bands of the Transformers masks they were already wearing. It’s not easy being nerd. Bai Ling and her taut body and sideboobs doesn’t help. Somebody call a fanboy full stop. We need to mop the floors between shows. Enjoy.
Bai Ling, Sideboob
It’s not all that hard. Hot blonde L.A. model, a hose, a fan, some skimpy outfits, somebody grab a camera because we’re about to make magic. As C-Heads magazine did with fair hottie Emily Palos in a photo shoot where she’s both dripping wet and wind blown naughty and all kinds of memorable peeks.
Not having much experience ogling Emily in the past, naturally I am giving her the all over examination with my retinal cones so I can memorize every inch of her oustandingly sextastic body. Like a dog sniffing a new acquaintance, I’m never quite comfortable until I can re-draw every nook and cranny of a woman with charcoal on paper with my eyes closed. I usually need about an hour, depending on how long I linger on the inner thighs. That is my weak spot. Welcome to Egotastic!, Emily. Linger while. We have dip. Enjoy.
The lovely Ashlee Simpson showed off her gorgeous plums in a sexy red swimsuit in Bali. Ashlee’s suit is mostly not there at all. The sides and back are completely gone. This allows us a view of glorious sideboob, and oh what a sideboob it is! Unlike her older sister Jessica, Ashlee’s ta’tas are more understated but no less sexy. I’ve always had more of a thing for Ashlee than Jessica. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because she seems a little more “girl next door” to me than her bombshell sister. That’s why I’m glad Ashlee and her funbags have resurfaced of late after many years out of the spotlight. What I know for sure is that if she keeps wearing stuff like this crypto-Baywatch boobtacular bathing suit, she is going to be in the news a lot more.
Bali is really far away. She should try being scantily clad closer to home. American beach goers need sideboob too, ya know.
Yasmine Colt hails from Venezuela, but now currently resides in my libido in her wet half-shirt and bikini bottom flashing her amazingly hot sideboob and all over fine female form in the shallows of Aruba. Wow. The silly 138 Water people who don’t actually seem to be selling any water have outdone themselves this time with this foreign beauty. She is, wow. Yasmine we really need to talk about what your side of hot funbags is doing to my nervous system right about now.
The wonderful thing about the world of the sextastic is just when you think you’ve seen it all, along comes another name, another face, another wickedly hot mostly nekkid body to prove that the sextastic is truly a never ending, constantly replenishing, domain of goodness. Yesterday, I didn’t even know of Yasmine Colt, today, I want to have her babies. It happens that fast. What a great world. Enjoy.