Egotastic
The realm of the ancient, decrepit scroll-y shooter is a bizarre one indeed. In the Eighties, awful arcade ballache Twinbee saw us piloting an odd little craft with stumpy Tyrannosaurus Rex-esque arms; shooting several shades of shit out of marauding fruit and/or kitchen implements. It was a little like a scene from one of those peculiar dreams our subconscious occasionally plucks from Satan’s undercarriage and thrusts before our bewildered eyeballs (although everyone kept their pants on in this instance).
There are a myriad of other examples, but only one of them features such nefarious enemies as urinals that fire piss-bullets at us. As such, naturellement, it’s the only one worth hearing about. Cork your ass and clench, then, because here comes Toilet Kids.
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Gaming’s Whacked Out Week: Boobs, Burgers and Bizarre Beverages
As you give another craptacular working week a vigorous mental middle finger, you’ll probably decide to celebrate by retiring to the local drinkatorium. This is no time to dick around with fancy-ass coffees with Kenyan names grown in remote mountainous regions of Italy (or vice versa, as the case may be), beer is needed. Strain it through your goddamn undercrackers if you want, we don’t care; it’s alcohol-o-clock.
But if you should decide to hipster it right up and go for a cappuccino or some such, be sure to take renowned ‘foam artist’/mad, mad bastard Nowtoo Sugi with you. Today’s star of the Whacked Out Week has one of the most scrote-shrivelingly-useless-yet-remarkable talents we’ve seen in an age, as you can see above.
And while you’re in the gallery, behold an amusingly irrelevant boob-slapping promotional game and the only restaurant in Canada that serves Chocobo Burgers. Nerdtastic!
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