Jessica Alba is Pregnant!? NOOOOooooooooo!

This one comes so out of the blue, that I can't even start to wrap my head around it,. As disturbing, and confounding, as it is, according to People.com, Jessica Alba is pregnant. And apparently, this isn't some Internet rumour, or made up hoax, or baby-bump speculation, this is the real deal, and has been confirmed by Jessica's publicist.

"I can confirm that Jessica and Cash are expecting a baby in late spring, early summer," says rep Brad Cafarelli.

Alba, 26, has dated Warren, 28, since the fall of 2004 after they met on the set of The Fantastic Four, on which Warren was a director's assistant.

The couple have been seen being affectionate together in Los Angeles in recent days, shopping for mattresses last Saturday and attending a Lakers game, where they were spotted kissing Sunday.

This is all very upsetting. I don't care if Christina Aguilera, or Britney Spears, or whoever pops out baby after baby after baby, but not Jessica Alba! What's going to happen to that perfect ass!? Ugh. At least her boobs will get bigger...

Oh, and congratulations to the couple, and all that bullshit.

Here are some Jessica Alba bikini pictures a) to make you feel better, and 2) because we probably won't be getting any new ones for a while. More Jessica Alba bikini pictures after the jump.

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Crazy Legs

Who is the celeb with those crazy legs? (Popoholic)

Ashlee Simpson has a new song. (Hollywood Tuna)

Kirsten Dunst topless? Close enough. (CollegeHumor NSFW)

Hilary Duff picks her nose. (Pink is the New Blog)

Kate Moss has no pants! (DListed)

Victoria Beckham gets lapdances with her husband. WTF!? (A Socialite's Life)

Janet Jackson has a new song, too. (PopSugar)

Did Britney Spears elope? Again? (Popbytes)

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are the couple of the year. (Just Jared)

Queen Latifah isn't getting married. (IDLYITW)

Pamela Anderson and Rick Solomon are getting a reality show. They should call it "When Herpes met Hepatitis." (Celebslam)

David Beckham shows off his package. (CityRag)

Madonna likes to do her yoga alone. (Hollywood Rag)

Tara Reid Bikini Rubdown

I'm not exactly sure why I'm posting these Tara Reid bikini pictures. It's not like we haven't seen Tara Reid in a bikini before, and it's not like we liked it that much the last time, either. But I think the fact that Tara is rubbing lotion all over her giant fake breasts is probably post-worthy. If at the very least to point out that she's rubbing the lotion all over the outside of her bikini top. Way to go, Tara.

Oh, and don't pay any attention to the flabby skin on Tara's stomach, or her flabby ass. Trust me, you'll be better off.

Photo credit: X17

Jessica Simpson’s Naked Acting Ambition

Well, this is the best story I've heard all day, if not all week. According to FemaleFirst, Jessica Simpson is so desperate to be taken seriously as an actress, that she is willing to do a full-frontal nude scene in order to get a prestigious movie role. That's right, we may get to see Jessica Simpson naked on the big screen.

A source said: "Jessica is in the running for a role that, if she gets it, will put her right on the map in terms of acting.

"The only hitch is that the script requires a number of quite graphic scenes including a full-frontal nude scene. Jessica is so desperate to land the role and get the industry's respect that she's ready to go against her better judgement, and her family, by agreeing to bare all."

Earlier this year, Jessica's father Joe Simpson forced her to turn down a potentially Oscar-winning role as a porn star - insisting she keep her clothes on.

He said: "The last script that came to us was for Jessica to be a porn star. We were promised we would win an Oscar with that. I told them, 'I think we'll just buy a statue of a little man and keep our clothes on.' "

Okay, so who do we need to petition, who do we need to pay, and who do we need to hire to kill Joe Simpson so that this Jessica Simpson nude scene can happen? Seriously people, if ever there was a reason to work together, this is it. Now, if only Lindsay Lohan were as desperate to be seen as a "serious actress."

More Jessica Simpson pictures after the jump.

Photo credit: Pacific Coast News
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Lily Allen Nipple Slip Pictures

 

Well, we already know about Lilly Allen's third nipple, but here's a Lily Allen nipple slip that shows off her regular second nipple, or is it her first?

Lily Allen fun fact: Did you know that Lily Allen called herself "The Blowjob Queen" when she was in High School?

Hayden Panettiere’s Kinky Boots

You know, I'm starting to think that there is a very kinky girl inside of Hayden Panettiere. Hayden was spotted in New York wearing a super-short skirt, and super-high boots, and the only logical conclusion to come to is that this girl wants it bad. What else could it mean? She's obviously not wearing that outfit to keep warm (hence the bundled up scarf). Then again, with boots that hot, I'm sure they're keeping her hot enough.

Photo credit: INF Photo

Crotch Spice

Geri Halliwell, aka Ginger Spice, shows off her "Britney." (Pink is the New Blog)

Fergie on stage at Movies Rock. (Hollywood Tuna)

Kim Kardashian side boob at the beach. (Popoholic)

Leonor Watling shows off her ass, and what a wonderful ass it is. (Thighs Wide Shut)

Hayden Panettiere and Ryan Gossling? Seriously? (DListed)

Britney Spears is pink and crazy again still. (PopSugar)

Meet Ashanti's sister. (IDLYITW)

Sarah Jessica Parker's text in the city. (Just Jared)

Paris Hilton is a midget f#@&er. (A Socialite's Life)

Where did Madonna get that black eye? (CityRag)

Now Lindsay Lohan is addicted to coffee. (Hollywood Rag)