Victoria Justice

Victoria Justice, Kari Byron, Ariana Grande, and Padma Lakshmi Headline Hotness at Creative Arts Emmy Awards

Talk about some of the biggest names in nerd boy lust-dom -- Kari Byron flashing leg and body and all decked out, doubly so for Ariana Grande, cooking mega-sextastic Padma Lakshmi, iCarly diva-ette Miranda Cosgrove, Malin Akerman, Victoria Justice, Jenner Morrison. Damn, the Primetime Creative Arts Emmy Awards, whatever the heck they are, brought out some serious PG-rated girls flashing decked out exhibitions on the red carpet over the weekend.

It was like a parade designed specifically to send fanboys rushing to their basements to takes a first crack at their No-Drip technology gallons o' lotion dispensers. I guess that's the creative arts part of the equation. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, and Nina Dobrev Highlight Cast of Hotties at Teen Choice Awards

There's a reason we don't let teens, most especially young teen girls, make important decisions. For one, Justin Bieber would be our nation's first lesbian President, and while hair-twistees would replace war, a whole bunch of other bad shizz would befall us as all important institutions were slowly turned into Forever 21 stores.

That being said, the Teen Choice Awards while being completely inane and craptastic in concept and delivery, did manage to deliver a bevy of super sextastic celebrities to the red carpet and insipid in-show skits, that with the volume turned all the way off, became tolerable thanks to the hotness of Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, Nina Dobrev, Taylor Swift, Hayden Panettiere, Zooey Deschanel, Bella Thorne, Lea Michele, and Victoria Justice. Pack all those ladies into a suitcase and head out for a weekend of non-stop self-stimulation, if you know what I'm saying. And, you do. Enjoy.

Charlize Theron Hotness and Ciara Cleavage Among the Few Reasons to Watch MTV Movie Awards

Sour grapes from us being banned from the MTV Movie Awards this year? Eh, maybe. But that show, that network, has really sunk to the bottom of the bowl like a turd trying to be first in line to hit the expressway home to the sewer line, which leads to a bunch of rehabbing inane drunkards checking into the Jersey Shore house for the sixth time on the East Coast while a bunch of mostly no-named, faceless rubes were paraded down the MTV red carpet last night and we were told they were fun and interesting and exciting people. Yeah, not so much.

However, MTV being owned by a much larger parent corporation, and still being a churning marketing machine to a teen audience of future postal workers, the studios did gear up some of their A-listers currently in theaters to pimp their wares at the award show, which led to the tremendous silver lining of the hotness likes of Charlize Theron and Kristen Stewart and Emma Watson and Jenna Dewan and Shailene Woodley and Victoria Justice and Ciara (who we did mostly include because of her sweet boobtastic show). And while the smiles were fake and the words polished, the hot bodies were still very much worth ogling. Enjoy.

Sextastic Twitpic Roundup Includes Rihanna Naughty, Kendall Jenner Booty, Kate Upton See-Through, and Much Much More…

A wise man might have predicted a year ago that the phenomenon of celebrities taking naughty or alluring photos of themselves would have slowly died down, what with all the public and private and backchannel scandals. Thankfully, Egotastic! has no wise men among us. We knew the trend was headed right in the opposite direction. Not only did we predict it, we lit candles and prayed for it.

This week's Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes just a bevy of self-photo'ed celebrity hotness including Rihanna making it rain in a naughty strip club manner, Kendall Jenner in an impossibly tight dress and a bikini, Ashley Tisdale bikini vacation photos, Kate Upton see-through top, and just a bunch more self-published pics that you really must see from a bunch of famous chicks who lust themselves almost as much as you do. Enjoy.

Katy Perry, Selena Gomez, and Halston Sage Lead List of Hotties at Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards

Up front let me say, I have no idea who half of the kid-land starlets of today are exactly. It's not exactly as if I'm perusing Nick shows during 'tween hour to get in solid chunks of laugh-track backed junior high comedies. However, my young concubine, the delightful Inez P. Minge, spends most of her days eating bulk licorice and watching Victorious, etc, so I got a bit of the insider's scoop.

At this weekend's Kids' Choice Awards Show, where essentially 12-year old girls pass judgement on what constitutes talent, the usual cast of celebrity characters made their marquee mark on the red carpet and on the stage, and, let's be honest, if 12-year old girls ran the world, we'd be in a shitload of trouble.

Still, the gathering was call to bring together a bunch of Hollywood hotties, young, and a bit older, all dressed in G-rated frocks that showed a lot of leg, but no cleavage, like lip gloss ad girls, cute, but without a hint of sexuality. Included among them were Katy Cocktease, whose team of publicists insist that she's happy, so she must be, Selena Gomez, who can't ever not look hot, Halston Sage, some young sextastic blonde with a made-up name form the Nick stable (and one of the few above 18 in the lineup, so we can actually officially call her 'hot), Ariana GrandeHeidi KlumVictoria JusticeAshley Tisdale, and a bevy of other farm system young model-actress types bursting at the teen seems to breakout into famous starlets. A fine mix of innocent with 'just discovered their naughty side' made for a fun evening. Enjoy.

Victoria Justice and Maria Menounos Form Nearly the Perfect Sextastic Sandwich at The Grove

Missing just the meat, natch.

Talk about the merging of two forces of pure hotness. The PG-rated goodness that is Maria Menounos, host of Extra and Dancing with the Stars contestant, interviewing G-rated frustratingly amazing hotness that is Victoria Justice, my two objects d' lust circling each other in a dance of visual wonderment so purely innocent, that I feel the strong desire to see it corrupted.

When these two visions of beauty started sucking their fingers yesterday at The Grove, honestly, I could feel the tugs of passion from several miles away. Like the most amazing voodoo curse ever. 

These are the girls I want crying over my box when they lay me six feet under. Enjoy.

Victoria Justice Steals the Show (and Our Loins) Decked Out at 2012 Brit Awards

I must admit to you, I have little idea what the Brit Awards are, or why Victoria Justice was invited to walk the red carpet. And I could care less. It's been so long since we've seen our brunette teen hottie anywhere, we were jonesing something awful, the office here was beginning to look like the detox room in Trainspotting. No Justice, no peace.

So when we get a chance to see Victoria Justice looking all kinds of grown up hot, we thought it a good time to remind ourselves why we love this super duper innocent young woman so much. Maybe she wears far too many clothes (hardly a maybe), but she is hot enough to still make us very interested. Enjoy.