Michelle Hunziker

Michelle Hunziker and Gaia Trussardi Bikini Pictures Show off Hot Prego Mom and Soon To Be Hottie Sister-in-Law

My future adoptive mother Michelle Hunziker is really bursting at the sextastic seams on her extended bikini vacation with her wealthy new Italian fiancee, and now has added his model sister in a bikini to the mix. I really can't wait to join this family.

Sure, at some point, Gaia Trussardi who is the ambitious model turned creative director of her father's fashion empire will loathe the living hell out of her dumb brother's new older wife, laden with an heir to the estate. But, for now, it's just two gals, one curvaceously pregnant, hanging out in their bikinis at the beach shooting the breeze. A breeze I sure would like to sample. Enjoy.

Michelle Hunziker Pregnant Bikini Pictures Continue to Show Off My Future Mama Baby Mama

Oh, that Michelle Hunziker could be curvaceously fertile for the rest of her days, or my days at least. I can not stop leering at, okay, call it obsessing, over how hot my future adopted mother looks as her body swells with life in her extended bikini vacation, with a couple more glimpses at the hottie Swiss Miss in both white and also blue...

Someday, everyone will come to understand the splendor of a swelling blonde hottie wearing hardly any clothing beneath the sun. Until that time, I shall sit alone in my Fortress of Fapitude and await the inevitable coming of a wicked wardrobe malfunction from Michelle. Enjoy.

Michelle Hunziker Bikini Pictures for the Ever Growing Preggo Hot Mommy

Despite many insistences to the contrary, I find my future adopted mom, the Swiss Miss and almost kind of married Michelle Hunziker to be getting more and more beautiful as she carries the half sister or brother of her already grown teen daughter, not to mention my own future adopted sibling.

Now, I'm not going to jump up on a stump and defend publicly breastfeeding moms, or attend a rally about giving all the good parking spots at Costo to women-with child, but when one of my favorite super hots starts to curve up in fertility, I'm right there with my offers of hand lotions, creams, and rubs to ease her aching sweet body. I just can not help it. And Michelle hanging out in her tiny bikinis whilst gestating is certainly not helping my cause. Oh, mama. Enjoy.

Michelle Hunziker Bikini Pictures Pregnant With Curvaceous Anticipation

Yes, I've been getting all those letters from many outraged readers when I get all high and lust-filled from ogling some of the with-child sextastic celebrities that we cover. Like this last letter that ready simply, 'you sick f--k'. It was short and to the point. But, my dad has never been once to mince words.

If leering at sweet hot future-mommies who might also be my adopted mom like Michelle Hunziker is some kind of illness, well, then I'm prepared to enter the sick ward. And I will wear my diagnosis like a badge of honor. For I see nothing wrong with filling the passion tanks full of, um, passion juice, while eying Michelle's fertile form up and down and every which way around her bikini while on vacation in Italy. In fact, I'm going to share both sets of bikinis Michelle and her growing curvy frame showed off this weekend...

Go on and dismiss this awesome fetish. That just leaves more 'M in the World MILF' for me to adore. Who's with me? Huh? What? Somebody? Anybody? Enjoy.

Michelle Hunziker Pregnant Bikini Beach Photos Because My Future Mommy Is Going to Be a Hot Mommy Again

No sooner have I nearly achieved my dream of having Swiss Miss model and TV hostess hottie Michelle Hunziker almost nearly agrees to be my new adopted mom, that she up and announces, err, visually declares, herself pregnant by way of her Euro-something boyfriend. Granted, my anger at being displaced in the new child department by a bio baby is mitigated by the site of my future hot mom in a bikini by the beach, showing off her swelling curvaceous body, both in the bikini, and the day before in revealing black one piece...

Still, it might've been nice to get a heads up on new of my future adopted brother or sister. Not to mention Michelle's existing teen daughter from another daddy might be having some feelings to work through. Baby's make everything complicated. Except for making mommy looking a little hotter when they're on their way. If you're into that kind of thing. And, as you know, I very much am no longer apologizing for that particular lust. Enjoy.

Happy Birthday to Michelle Hunziker, My Future Adopted Mom!

As you know, I'm two steps into the seventeen step process to have hottie Swiss Miss Michelle Hunziker named my new adopted mother (step one was filling out the form, step two mailing it, just fifteen more steps to go.).

And, today, on her 36th birthday, I'd like to give a shoutout to my future mom, So check out the hottest mom on the block with a look back at some of our favorite Michelle Hunziker pictures since our adoption process first began. (And, yeah, if you want to see my future adopted mom topless on her birthday, you can do that too.) Enjoy.

Michelle Hunziker Black Leather Dress Shows Off the Shape of My Future Mom

As you are well away, the adoption process remains 'active and ongoing' on my petition for Swiss Miss veteran hottie Michelle Hunziker to become my adoptive mom. It's not that I don't love my bio mom and respect how ever many vagrants she had to sedate and steal their organs to help put food on the table for our large brood, it's just that I always dreamed of a parental figure who looked like Michelle Hunziker did in her black leather dress last night during Milan Fashion Week.

When I imagine Michelle and I cuddled up together reading inspiration picture books before bed time, me in my Spiderman footsie pajamas, my new adopted mom in black lace negligee, it just all seems so warm and innocent and maternal.

Just sign the papers, Michelle. And let's make this our first family holiday season together. Enjoy.