Have boobs will travel. If you’re the curvaceous short person known as Kim Kardashian, a big dollar hair products pimping deal in London means you need to have nice looking hair, and even nicer looking tomatoes on the big reveal. Advertisers want their appearance fee money’s worth. If you hire Elsa for a Frozen birthday party for you little girl, Elsa better look super blonde and sing Let It Go. Kim Kardashian better flasher her large mammaries in some kind of expensive, but revealing dress. This is the business covenant.
Kim and sister Khloe were pimping something called Hairfinity in London. It sounds like some horrible nightmare scape in a Clive Barker novel but i’m guessing it’s mostly just ineffective hair care products in fancy looking bottles. Either way, the idea is when you look directly into Kim’s mega nuggets, you will be too confused to remember anything but your credit card number. I’d mock it more, but it keeps on working. Sometimes evil plots do pan out. Enjoy.
Your stepfather’s birthday party seems like perhaps an odd place to wear a tight sheer top over your mammoth mammaries, but when you live life on camera, I suppose there’s no down time from the exhibition time. Kim Kardashian found the perfect dress to wear in a couple sizes too small for her curves and headed off to Bruce Jenner’s celebration. It was hard to miss Kim considering her massive funbags and nipples looked ready to go Vesuvius at any given moment.
I’ve never begrudged Kim using her big curves to earn a living. You need to work with what you’ve got. She’s turned the few things she’s got into a major business empire. That’s impressive even if you don’t care for her personally. And, yes, she had some help, from mom, and Mother Nature, and various doctors around town. Still, as long as Kim isn’t charging for ogles, I’ve made my peace with her vapid doll house life. Enjoy.
Kim Kardashian turned 34. Various body parts, harder to determine age without forensic pathology. But Kim and her parts celebrated big time in Vegas over the weekend her birthday and more so the fact that she was getting paid to celebrate her birthday. They just don’t hand that privilege out to anyone. It helps if you promise to being along your healthy humpers and show them off to the entire Vegas nightclub audience who has to pay to join your little soiree.
I always had trouble getting people to show up to my birthday parties, let alone paying a cover to get in. Probably has something to do with that dress she’s wearing. I know I couldn’t pull that off. I’m assuming it was designed especially for Kim and her less than 34 year old yummy yams. If only she could get 34 of them, then we could’ve have blown them out and applauded. Kim, you are not shy about showing off your moneymakers. I will give you that. Enjoy.
Kim Kardashian wore an outfit on a Taco Bell date with Kanye West that showed off all of her best assets. First, she was sporting a pair of cut-off shorts that accentuated that legendary booty. Seriously, in the history of booties going back to the beginning of time has there been a greater butt than that of Kim K? I think not. Then she wore a sweater that had its entire back missing to further show off her amazing curves. Of course, she also forgot to wear a bra and she was nipping fiercely through the sweater’s front.
Usually, when I go to Taco Bell I am just wearing sweatpants and an old Legend of Zelda t-shirt. Leave it to Kim to make even a run for the border an opportunity to sexy it up. Kanye got a Beefarito with fire sauce and his hotty wife on the side.
Oh, Kim Kardashian. Every day I wake up, make some coffee, pour myself a bowl of Cap’n Crunch and ask myself, “How will Kim show off her splendid funbags today?” I am never disappointed. Today’s entry in the ongoing battle between Kim and clothes is this see-through dress. You can see the exact outline of her Kardashinips because, like most days, Kim forgot to wear a bra. In fact, I would go so far as to say that Kim despises bras more than any other woman in the world. What Earthly object of cotton, silk, and wire could hope to contain such magnificent orbs of lady flesh? None, that’s why she doesn’t wear them. That Kanye is one lucky bastard. He gets unlimited access to those badboys whenever he wants.
Some people have all the luck. All that we mere mortals can do is stare at her sweater hams and dream of the day when all women have ta-tas like Kim and bras are a thing of the past.
Hall of fame hottie Kim Kardashian was sexy as F in a black lace number that she wore to the Givenchy show in Paris. Essentially, Kim was wearing a lace teddy with sheer stockings. I guess she just decided that she was going to wear her underwear to the show and forgo the whole clothing thing. I celebrate her decision to do so. Needless to say that those legendary funbags were prominently featured. Say what you want about Kim, there are two facts that are undeniable: 1) She has one of the most spectacular racks on the planet. The cleavage in this outfit can be seen from space. 2) Her booty is the best butt that has ever been fashioned by mother nature. These are not up for negotiation and are simply scientific truths like gravity or that people with small hands are creepy.
I wake up in the morning wondering what new and exciting cleavtacular outfits Kim is going to wear. I think I need to get a hobby.
When you think hot Parisian fashion, you think Kim Kardashian. Okay, when you think big mostly bare boobtastic and Parisian fashion, you think Kim Kardashian. The reality star is never to be outdone at a get together of high society when it comes to showing off that which made her famous. Well, not all the things that made her famous as that would be too showy even by French standards, but you can bet her funhags were on serious display during Fashion Week in Paris.
Now, somebody who knows or cares more about fashion could tell you exactly what show Kim was attending in her extreme open front outfit. But suffice it to say, she got the attention of all the cameras and at least one crazy paparazzi stalker that I believe was her basic intention. Have boobs will travel for this brunette merchandising queen. Enjoy.