Sadly, but not entirely unexpectedly, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles kind of sucked really badly. Even the presence of the sultry Megan Fox running around in tight outfits couldn’t save that unsavory turtle soup. But, Megan Fox can still rescue a movie premiere in Berlin, where I guess the movie is just coming out so tons of Germans can still have hope the film will be good while staring at Megan Fox looking all kind of leggy hot at the premiere. That’s how I got hooked in the first place.
Megan Fox may not be one-hundred percent what she was in latter years, but that’s like saying Peyton Manning isn’t what he used to be. He’s still really really good. Megan Fox is still really really hot. And as for short dresses showing off her toned alluring legs, wunderbar! Enjoy.
The lovely Dakota Fanning was looking seriously hot in a slinky red dress at the London premiere of “Effie Gray”. The dress was short, red, and had some sexy flapper fringe on the bottom. I was all like, “23 skiddoo” but in my pants, if you get my meaning. The dress showed off her awesome legs. They are creamy white and oh so smooth. Your girlfriend/wife doesn’t have legs like that. That only happens in Hollywood. The dress also had a plunging neckline and presented her lovely perky love sacks for all the photogs at the event. I remember thinking when she was a little kid that one day she would grow up to be ridiculously hot. It can go either way, you know. Not all pretty kids grow up to be hot adults. But she certainly did.
I think maybe I’m a hottness prophet.
Casey Batchelor is not going to let a couple things like her big front things stop her from wearing low cut outfits and tiny bikinis. Not when the award for most photographed celebrity is up for grabs each and every night somewhere in this world.
Casey flashed her impressive mams which she claims are downsized from just a few months ago on the red carpet of a movie premiere in London. Naturally, every single camera lens was directed by gravity if nothing else to her impressive chestal assets. If you build them, they will come. Something like that. I just admire a girl who knows her best side and isn’t afraid to use it. Casey Batchelor would made for a fun movie premiere date, if you didn’t mind being known as ‘hey, who’s the shlump with the girl with the giant hoo-haws?’. I certainly don’t. Enjoy.
Super sexy model and topless girl in music videos Emily Ratajkowski was looking particularly cleavtastic at the Gone Girl premiere at the New York Film Festival. She was wearing a red dress that has some seriously amazing cleav. Who can forget the first time they saw Emily’s now legendary funbags in the uncensored version of Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines video? I certainly recall being mesmerized by her bouncing bosoms. I consider myself a bit of an expert in the boobtastic sciences and I can honestly say that Emily’s chichis are in the top 3 best boobs around right now. I know some may disagree with me, but I do not come to this decision lightly and am arriving at this conclusion through years of painstaking work talking and writing about funbags every day.
Either way, I always enjoy when Emily comes up on our radar because it usually means some incredible boobage action.
My ginger dream girl Jessica Chastain was looking boobtastically cleavtacular at the premiere of “The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby” in San Sebastian. Jess, (I can call her that because we are that close…in my head), has an amazing rack. It’s seriously one of my favorites and I have a masters degree in funbag studies. What makes it even more wonderful is the fact that Jessica a) likes to show off her yum yums at every opportunity and b) she hates bras. She must go through rolls of that tape they use to keep these kinds of dresses from revealing their busty contents every week. The cleavage in these pics is something spectacular, my friends. Her white, freckled mounds of joy are busting out of her dress.
I pray to the boob gods that one day the tape will become loose and we get a nip slip. Wouldn’t that be amazing? A boy can dream.
Toronto Film Festival really does bring out the hotties from all parts of the globe. Well, Britain, by way of Los Angeles at least. It’s not quite Cannes, then again, it’s not quite as pretentious as Cannes, which means you can ogle the likes of Cara Delevingne and uber-MILFtastic Kate Beckinsale without having to cross your legs and smirk. And, oh, what a pair to ogle.
The fine British lasses of different sextastic generations were decked out for the premiere of Face of an Angel. It could have been called the Body of an Angel That I’d Like to Ravish if you know what I’m saying. But I guess movie titles have to be a little more vague so you see them by accident or when your girlfriend says you should see it it sounds at least okay. I’d pretty much go to any movie with Cara on my left, Kate on my right, and my butter greasy groping hands simply ruining their designer gowns. Dare to dream, my friends. You never know. Enjoy.
Kids movie smhmids movie I say. Why can’t Ashley Judd wear a revealing dress top just because she’s pimping a cute animal flick for the kids? Who do you think take those kids to the movies? That’s right, us gentleman oglers who very much appreciate a braless peek of Ashley Judd on the carpet for the Dolphin Tale Two premiere.
I just admit, I can’t tell you what happened in the first movie. Though I don’t see why that should keep me from fully admiring Ashley’s peek-a-boo’s at the premiere. I’ve seen this plot line before and I always like it. Ashley does a ton of family films these days. Perhaps next time we can get some crotchless panties and a corset top, and, yes, a smile. She does have a nice one of those. Enjoy.