Movie Premiere Posts:

Bella Thorne and Sister Dani Thorne Get Cheeky Hot on the Red Carpet for ‘Blended’

The chances of me seeing the new Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore movie is somewhat in the percentage ballpark of me suddenly dunking in my next pickup basketball game, with the only difference that I still dream about dunking. Ah, Sandler. That being said, the film does serve as one of the many new breakout points for breakout teen starlet hottie Bella Thorne, who showed up to the L.A. premiere with her older sister Dani Thorne, the two getting quite cute and cheeky on the red carpet.

We occasionally see Dani Thorne in her more risque photoshoots on this site now that she's of a slightly older age, while we now see Bella Thorne here all the time increasingly grown up in her wardrobe and appearance. It's becoming quite a thing. The two stole the red carpet. Go Thorne girls, I bet you've got even more in your toolbox than what you're showing. Enjoy.

Blake Lively Owns the Red Carpet For Mr. Turner in Cannes

I've really missed Blake Lively. She's gone into semi-hiding the past couple of years, her and her long legs and hot body and alluring looks and poses. But when the gong sounds and it's time for decked out A-lister on the red carpet, you can bet Blake will be there schooling the lesser girls in the art of winning every photographer's attention.

So it was at the Cannes premiere for Mr. Turner, where Blake wore something expensive and important, I'm sure, but more importantly reminded me why I had her name henna tattooed onto a body part that is technically illegal to do in the Lower 48. Blake, someday, I'd love to have you as my dolled up arm candy to one of the important events I attend. Like the retro-arcade opening I'm going to next week, or waiting in line at the Donut shop for the first morning batch. I like to take my ladies around town to show them off. Call me, I'll make you feel like a woman. Enjoy.

Blake Lively, Kendall Jenner, and Adele Exarchopoulos Highlight the Hotness at the ‘Grace Of Monaco’ Cannes Premiere

I can't say Cannes is exactly where'd you expect to see Kendall Jenner, but what the heck. Tall, pretty, 18-year old girls are pretty much welcome anywhere they want to go. Blake Lively was also in attendance at the Grace of Monaco premiere at Cannes and she can light up a red carpet with hotness like nobody's business. Joining the twosome in the sextastic was cleavy Adele Exarchopoulos from only one of the best erotic lesbionic films of last year that broke big at Cannes.

Quite an assembly at the snooty French film festival that does delight our visual senses annually with many of the world's hottest women getting decked out to walk its massive red carpets. It's a square deal for us gentleman oglers, especially since we're never forced to go see these films lauded at Cannes as must-sees. No sir, bring me Godzilla! Enjoy.

Jennifer Lawrence And Emma Roberts Look Hot at “X-Men: Days of Future Past” Premiere

Jennifer Lawrence and Emma Roberts were their usual hot selves at the New York City premiere of X-Men: Days Of Future Past. Jennifer, who plays everyone's favorite nekkid blue chick Mystique, wore a body clinging fuzzy dress. The outfit shows off her lovely shoulders and back and accentuates those legendary curves. Emma Roberts was there to support her lucky fiance Evan Peters who plays Quicksilver in the movie. Emma had on a low cut pink dress that showed off some of that famous cleavage. They should cast Emma in the next X-Men movie. Her mutant power can be turning any man who sees her into a quivering bowl of Jell-O. She and Jennifer could square off in the climactic scene in which they battle to see who is the hottest in a giant kiddie pool full of KY Jelly.

I'm available to write the screenplay for this epic. We can call it X-Men: Days Of Future Stiffies or something like that. We can work on the title.

Sofia Vergara Sultry Cleavetastic Cooking Hot for Chef Premiere

When it comes to red carpet competitions, I pity the poor woman who even attempts to keep up with Sofia Vergara. Between that veteran hot body, those twin fiestas of joy, and the experience to put it all together in one camera-attracting ball of must-shoot hotness, Sofia is really the queen of the red carpet hill. She's an unstoppable force of the decked out sextastic, again at the premiere of Chef at the Tribeca Film Festival.

I have a feeling Sofia Vergara looks wicked hot and put together just going to take a tinkle in the morning. I might be projecting my dreams a bit, but she just always looks like a million bucks. Oh, to be the guy who gets to cinch up her blessedly bodacious top. Who I wouldn't knock into the river to get that gig. Enjoy.

Cameron Diaz, Kate Upton, and Nicki Minaj Cleavetastic for The Other Woman Premiere

I can't help but feel like The Other Woman has been coming out in theaters for about ten years now. Maybe just because we've been tracking this film and it's boobtastic cast for so long now during production. But it's finally here. Which means red carpet. Which means big cleavage shows for a chick flick about affairs and fooling around and revenge and other things women love that I don't quite understand. But I do totally get Cameron Diaz in a low cut dress, who along with Kate Upton being her bosomy self and a surprise chesty appearance from the funbags of Nicki Minaj, made for one ripe melon filled red carpet in Los Angeles.

Now, whether or not your woman makes you go to see this movie, that's between you and your conscious. Yes, I know, Kate Upton and Cameron Diaz and bikinis and yadda yadda. We've seen all the photos. Do as you must, my wayward son. Just, please, don't explain yourself after the fact. It's in the details where we lose our souls. Enjoy.

Shailene Woodley Red Hot and Drop Dead Grown Up for Divergent Premiere in Madrid

We've lusted Shailene Woodley since The Descendants big unveiling, but she just keeps getting better and better. Despite being a homemade granola making naturist who prefers to shear her hair and live off oak bark trimmings in the wild, I think I could put up with most of that Mother Earth indulgences if just once a month Shailene came out decked out in a little red number like she did for the Divergent premiere in Madrid.

I hope that Shailene isn't in the mode of Robin Wright and other serious thespianics who become ashamed of their fine looks and do everything they can not to be the Hollywood beauty. That always seems like such a needless loss. Shailene has so much to offer sextastic wise. I hope she travels down that path a while. There's always time to live in the trees with Daryl Hannah when you get a bit older. Enjoy.