Covered Topless

Shailene Woodley Topless Covered Because That’s Not Just Acting, That’s Giving

Shailene Woodley revels in her hippy chick crunchy tomboy persona. To each their own. I’d still want her in my tent on a camping trip. Mostly because I can’t find my own food or water when out in the woods, also because at some point she’s going to want to bathe in the river and have somebody she knows won’t peek supervising. Well, she’s half right about me.

The not super shy serious thespianic got her arm bra working for Glamour Magazine in the U.K. I get the feeling Shailene doesn’t necessarily like all of this fashion and style nonsense, but it is part of the Hollywood A-list game, you can’t win if you don’t play. So long as she adheres to the policy of not shirt for her shoots, I find I can heavily support her efforts. We’ve seen her topless before and know she’s hiding something rather spectacular. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Glamour UK Magazine

Maria Jose Martinez Hot Body Teases in Nothing But Stockings and Heels Betwixt the Sheet

There are so many things I do lust about en fuego Colombiana women. And so many reasons to applaud Soho magazine which covers the famous ones, well, uncovers them, with special attention to the veteran hottie actresses they often get into lingerie or less for their outstanding photo sessions.

Take for instance telenovela star Maria Jose Martinez. Oh, that I could take Maria somewhere far away where nobody would find us until two hundred years hence when archaeologists dig up our remains still clutching one another in some needlessly dangerous sex position. This Latina lovely looks so damn hot in her stockings and undergarments, I’m tempted to gas up the Egotastic! Winnebago and caravan on down to take her out to the Bogota Denny’s for fine dining. I just need gas prices to drop below ten cents a gallon and I could cover one way. Once I meet Maria, I have no intention of a return trip. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Soho

British Models Sideboob For the Love of Animals

As I’ve always said, I don’t care what your mission is in life, it’ll go down much better with topless girls in their undies. I think I’ve always said that. At least inside my head. Now I’d like to share it with you. Bingo.

PETA is gearing up for some anti-fur protests at the upcoming London Fashion Week by bringing out the topless girls with swell bottoms to carry their message boards. Sadly, this being England, the girls were forced by the local constables to not bare their full wares on the streets of the fair city lest there by a riot or some Dickensian character cry foul. Nevertheless, point well taken, PETA. You drop off the topless girls and I’ll hand over the otters I keep in a tank in my basement for future footwear. Oh, you haven’t lived until you’ve walked a mile in otter. Granted, it’s still not as good as topless women. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/AKM-GSI

Candice Swanepoel Covered Topless And Other Fine Things To Ogle


Candice Swanepoel uses her arm as a bra. (Popoholic)

It’s cold here but it’s bikini weather somewhere. (The Chive)

Amber Rose grinds up on a dude like a champ. (WWTDD)

Jen Selter is hot in a bikini. So is her mom. (TMZ)

Kate Hudson‘s abs are RIDICULOUS. (Huffington Post)

Margot Robbie is sexy as F for Vogue Australia. (Drunken Stepfather)

Roxanne Sanderson in a swimsuit will make your day. (Hollywood Tuna)

Micaela Schaefer Wearing Nothing But Love For Valentine’s

At this point, German model Micaela Schaefer seems to spend most of her waking hours mostly nekkid at the Brandenburg gate in Berlin. Everybody has their hobby. Who am I too judge. Especially when the result is the tall busty brunette flashing her funbags throughout much of the German daylight hours. For the holiday this week, covered especially in just Valentine’s Hearts. As if you needed directions to the sweet spots.

Micaela Schaefer is another one of those sextastic celebrities who help raise the bar in terms of public exhibitionism. Others see her and think, hmm, maybe I better start getting a little racier in my own promotional work. To which I think back, hmm, that would be ever so nice. We need trendsetters. If they’re hot models, all the better. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Splash

Kendall Jenner Topless and Kim Kardashian Bottomless But Morphed Patched Up Oddities in Love Magazine

I must admit. This one is beyond me, but I just had to share.

Love Magazine is releasing a rather elaborate photo spread of Kendall Jenner, Kylie Jenner, and Kim Kardashian where they are shot to look like something out of strange pulp sci-fi noir novels or something along those lines. Included are Kendall Jenner with digitally smooshed ta-ta’s blown up and covered in digital pasties along with Kim Kardashian nekkid save for some post-production marks and Kylie Jenner blonde anime looking. The three of them for some reason hyper-stylized into something rather less than normal appeal. Why? I do not know. Art, I guess. Hence, my disagreement with art as a legit subject matter. I’m all for the experimentation of the creative mind in visual form, but if you’ve got Kendall Jenner willing to flash her boobtastic and Kim exposing her bare behind, isn’t that the time for some photo realism? I’m a simple cad, I know. But I’m also right, am I not? Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Love Magazine

Cara Delevingne Covered Topless in Jewels

I believe this is actually a jewelry ad? Maybe just accessorizing in general as Britty young it girl model Cara Delevingne doesn’t seem to be wearing much else. Not that that’s a bad thing. It surely allows us to see more of what she’s really selling which is her bare sextastic and model allure, that special quality that makes men want her and women want to buy from her. Though with Cara, it also makes women want her, or vice-versa, as her lesbionic reputation continues to grow out in the modeling world and the deep recesses of my libido.

Cara is one of those unique looking girls that perhaps doesn’t fit the classic definition of statuesque model beauty, but certainly has an appeal all her own. As connected as she is, these merch pimpers would not be paying her top dollar to hawk their wares were she not super effective in her rolling around half-nekkid skill set. She seems to be doing fine from where’s I’m standing, err, sitting, err, hunched around my computer monitor. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: John Hardy