Covered Topless

What Became of Jenna Miles, Sextastic Internet Girl Next Door?

I don’t know exactly. But EgoReader ‘Jeremy’ asked me so I’m asking you. A couple years ago Jenna Miles burst onto the YouTube/Social Media heartbreaking scene with numerous crazy hot brunette sweetheart covered topless pictorials and visual displays of wonderment. Websites, tumblr accounts, all the works. Then, poof. It was like lightning in a bottle. I hope the reasons for her absence are of the administrative or casual decision nature only. But I offered to help out Jeremy in his quest. I mean, just look at Jenna Miles.

Egotastic! team of human bloodhounds with excessively sensitive senses when it comes to hot women — engage!

Photo Credit: What Used to be JennaMiles site

Suki Waterhouse, Cara Delevingne, and Georgia May Jagger Form the Sandwich of All Nekkid Model Sandwiches


Every now and then a photo comes along that reminds me of why I got into the business of naughty day dreaming. This new teaser for Vogue featuring young models Suki Waterhouse, Cara Delevingne, and Georgia May Jagger is just one of those photos. From the gap teethed down the nekkid covered bodies to the fuzzy heels, there’s nothing about this picture that I don’t absolutely endorse. Well, perhaps the fact that Cara’s taken my place. But, being a semi-realistic dreamer, I can live with the fact that this show is going to mostly be about watching. Girls, you have no idea how big I tip, provided you’re not good at converting U.S. dollars in your noggins. So desperately hot. Please, don’t stop. Enjoy.

Photo credit: Vogue Magazine

Anja Konstantinova Covered Topless In The Studio

Petite Russian beauty Anja Konstantinova decided that she didn’t need a restrictive bra, her arm was support enough. Anja has what I like to call a pair of perkies. They aren’t massive hooters that might give a man carpal tunnel from handling them but they aren’t mosquito bites either. No, they are just right in the middle. Her boobs would be the ones Goldilocks would pick because they are just right. I bet she seriously doesn’t often wear a bra. I imagine that she moves around and everything stays in place. I’ll give the Russians this, they sure know how to produce some fine women. That and vodka. They are pretty great at making both.

I do so love a good covered topless pic. I enjoy the tease as it makes life exciting. Who wants a girl you don’t have to work for a little bit?

Photo Credit: Alessandro Casagrande

Shailene Woodley Topless Covered Because That’s Not Just Acting, That’s Giving

Shailene Woodley revels in her hippy chick crunchy tomboy persona. To each their own. I’d still want her in my tent on a camping trip. Mostly because I can’t find my own food or water when out in the woods, also because at some point she’s going to want to bathe in the river and have somebody she knows won’t peek supervising. Well, she’s half right about me.

The not super shy serious thespianic got her arm bra working for Glamour Magazine in the U.K. I get the feeling Shailene doesn’t necessarily like all of this fashion and style nonsense, but it is part of the Hollywood A-list game, you can’t win if you don’t play. So long as she adheres to the policy of not shirt for her shoots, I find I can heavily support her efforts. We’ve seen her topless before and know she’s hiding something rather spectacular. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Glamour UK Magazine

Maria Jose Martinez Hot Body Teases in Nothing But Stockings and Heels Betwixt the Sheet

There are so many things I do lust about en fuego Colombiana women. And so many reasons to applaud Soho magazine which covers the famous ones, well, uncovers them, with special attention to the veteran hottie actresses they often get into lingerie or less for their outstanding photo sessions.

Take for instance telenovela star Maria Jose Martinez. Oh, that I could take Maria somewhere far away where nobody would find us until two hundred years hence when archaeologists dig up our remains still clutching one another in some needlessly dangerous sex position. This Latina lovely looks so damn hot in her stockings and undergarments, I’m tempted to gas up the Egotastic! Winnebago and caravan on down to take her out to the Bogota Denny’s for fine dining. I just need gas prices to drop below ten cents a gallon and I could cover one way. Once I meet Maria, I have no intention of a return trip. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Soho

British Models Sideboob For the Love of Animals

As I’ve always said, I don’t care what your mission is in life, it’ll go down much better with topless girls in their undies. I think I’ve always said that. At least inside my head. Now I’d like to share it with you. Bingo.

PETA is gearing up for some anti-fur protests at the upcoming London Fashion Week by bringing out the topless girls with swell bottoms to carry their message boards. Sadly, this being England, the girls were forced by the local constables to not bare their full wares on the streets of the fair city lest there by a riot or some Dickensian character cry foul. Nevertheless, point well taken, PETA. You drop off the topless girls and I’ll hand over the otters I keep in a tank in my basement for future footwear. Oh, you haven’t lived until you’ve walked a mile in otter. Granted, it’s still not as good as topless women. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/AKM-GSI

Candice Swanepoel Covered Topless And Other Fine Things To Ogle


Candice Swanepoel uses her arm as a bra. (Popoholic)

It’s cold here but it’s bikini weather somewhere. (The Chive)

Amber Rose grinds up on a dude like a champ. (WWTDD)

Jen Selter is hot in a bikini. So is her mom. (TMZ)

Kate Hudson‘s abs are RIDICULOUS. (Huffington Post)

Margot Robbie is sexy as F for Vogue Australia. (Drunken Stepfather)

Roxanne Sanderson in a swimsuit will make your day. (Hollywood Tuna)