Cleavage Posts:

Kelly Brook Bouncy Flouncy Fun Time Cleavage Is In the House

I think in my recent edition of Stalker Weekly, I mentioned to you my excitement knowing Kelly Brook was moving herself into my general vicinity. That's a real estate term, sadly, not a sexual innuendo. Now Kelly and her round mounts of rebound fun are jiggling up and down the local streets making coffee runs, shopping, and whatever else it is curvaceous full-bodied female models do in between stripping down for the cameras.

Kelly Brook is the answer to those of you who displeased with the trends of skinny chicks in Hollywood. Kelly has got more than a little something something tucked up under her wardrobe. She's a woman with no straight lines anywhere, save for the line of men moving into place to hit on her now that she's single again. Not that that stopped them before. Kelly, come by any time and borrow some sugar from me. You know know when I might need a return favor on those sweets. Enjoy.

Courtney Stodden Yams Up for Foundation Event

It's hard to imagine in my mini-sized brain that anybody actually puts together a red carpet fundraiser event and utters the words, 'We really need to land Courtney Stodden to make this a success'. Nevertheless, there she is, with her XL sized udders righteously barely contained in her revealing dress top at some charitable event that looked far too fancy for my crocs and ripped jeans formal wear. I will give this to Courtney, she creates visuals that will not be overlooked. Such is the power of the boobtastic by its very primal defnition.

Credit is due to Courtney's mom and public rep who books her for these fancy gigs. She wouldn't have made it past the Deacon at my school dances, not with her demon's handiwork hanging out so brazenly. Then again, I would have definitely asked her to dance. Something slow. Like a Hall & Oates ballad. There's being picky and then there's been a horny teen. Never the twain shall meet. Enjoy.

 

Jennifer Lawrence’s Deep Cleavage at ‘Serena’ Premiere

America's sweetheart, Jennifer Lawrence, showed off some DEEP cleav at the premiere of Serena at the 58th BFI London Film Festival. She wore a jacket and short skirt combo that was open almost all the way down to her belly button. This allowed us all a nice view of her lovely Katniss Everdeens. I mean, of course, those amazing funbags that hackers went to so much trouble to show us all a few months back. They are seriously incredible ta-tas. Sure, she's a good actress but those sweater puppies have made her a star. I wonder if you see any more of them in this Serena movie? Unfortunately, she's always covered up in those Hunger Games movies because she's trying to survive in a forest or whatever. That's why I liked American Hustle. That movie was all about J-Law's cleavage.

I have a big thing for J-Law. I'm a sucker for America's sweethearts with big boobies.

Emmy Rossum Cleavetastic Angel in Black

Our lovely lean little lady Emmy Awesome has been hitting the Oscar movie circuit of late, decked out in various looks, different shades of hotess, and showing off her fine wares. She was at the You're Not You movie premiere last night in a form fitting black dress that I'm assuming not just any woman can get away with wearing. But Emmy, oh, yes, she gets away with it.

Once I stopped staring at Emmy's sweet cleavage I took a moment just to silently thank her for her magnificent work and topless thespianics on Shameless over several seasons now. It's the kind of thing we gentleman oglers can easily take for granted, but it was so monumental when first she bared her funbags, and remains ever so monumental to this day. Let us not forsake the Rossum ta-ta's and lithesome body. Ever. Enjoy.

Lea Michele Cleavetastic Performance at American Horror Story Premiere

I'm not sure how they have premieres for TV shows, but they do, and Lea Michele was determined to own it with her pushed up deep cleavage. Bravo I say. I'm not even sure she's associated with American Horror Story. I think she just showed up to steal the red carpet in a dress she found which flattered her funbas. Bravo, I repeat.

There is only one ceremonial protocol that should matter in Hollywood. If you look hot and chesty in a dress, put it on and get yourself out in front of the cameras. Invite shminvite. Lea Michele is looking rather chesty alluring these days. It won't do any of us any good if you keep those sweet peaches under a sweatshirt at home. If you got 'em, flaunt 'em. Enjoy.

Reese Witherspoon Reveals Cleavage For Vogue Magazine

Movie star and sexy gal Reese Witherspoon displayed her amazing cleave for November's Vogue Magazine issue. She wore a series of fancy dresses that all had one important thing in common: maximum boobage exposure. She should get a second Oscar for those puppies. I've always had a crush on Reese, I admit it. When forced to go see one of her rom-coms by my wife, I rarely complain. Because I think she's really hot unlike other rom-comers that don't do it for me. I understand that rom-comers isn't a word...but it is now because I invented it. Anyhoo, the dresses in these pics also showed off a little bit of Reese's smooth sexy legs. I remember thinking that she had a spectacular set of stems back when she was in Legally Blonde.

Yeah, I saw Legally Blonde. I saw the not so great sequel too. She wore a lot of sexy outfits, yo.

Lea Michele’s Mighty Cleave And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Lea Michele was all kinds of leggy and cleavy at the American Horror Story: Freakshow Premiere. (Huffington Post)

Kelly Brook was nice enough to post some nude selfies. Thanks! (Drunken Stepfather)

Hailey Clauson sports some sexy bikinis. (Hollywood Tuna)

Megan Fox sports a slinky black dress at TMNT premiere in Berlin. (Popoholic)

Ever wonder what it's like to shoot a sex scene with Brooklyn Decker? (The Superficial)

And now, lots of pictures of Victoria's Secret model Magdalena Frackowiak. (COED)

Pilot a plane for Air Canada and get some free porn, eh. (TMZ)