For the less observant among the Ego-ranks, it’s Friday! Congratulations for surviving to the ass-end of another week without shitting in your boss’s wastebin, raising your fists heavenwards and exclaiming, Nuts to this, I’m going to travel to a snow-capped mountain and spend several painstaking... Read More
There are certain things that you can wager your wang will always surface at any comic convention. Inscrutable bespectacled Asian guys, small children being buffeted and/or trampled on by the crowd, general geektacular camararderie... we can (oftentimes) take this all as read. Sadly, on a scale of... Read More
You’ve probably heard the legend that Pac-Man’s appearance was inspired by a sans-a-slice pizza. First thing you learn in Video Game Anecdote-ery 101, that is. What may be unclear is just how in the name of Satan’s baggy balls he made the transition from fat-tacular Hey, Ma! I can’t see my wang... Read More
Arkham aficionados (if you’re sitting in your Batman undercrackers -and, presumably, other attire- at the office as we speak, that’s you. Bonus points if you have a tattoo of the vengeful vigilante’s face on your scrote, and have named ‘him’ Bruce Wang) are surely aware of the impending October... Read More
We’ve all gleefully ogled the recent, wang-waving trailer for Grand Theft Auto V. Michael, Franklin and Trevor’s threefold narrative brought us many things: a head-on collision betwixt a craptastic old car and a train, a dude leaping from an apartment window in his skimpy little underpants as Queen’s... Read More
Continuing our retrospective regarding all things somehow dubbed ‘sexy’ in the pre-internet era, we have... Peek-A-Boo Poker. Hold your nose and tie your nuts in a knot, because this is several simultaneous kinds of terrible. In the early Nineties, the youthful, ardent oglers among us (which is... Read More
Today’s installment addresses all the vital issues facing today’s young, slim, not at all middle aged spread-y dudely dudes: ass ogling, Rockstar’s impending digital colossus Grand Theft Auto V and public toilet etiquette (which is, as we know, governed by such commandments as thou shalt not make... Read More
As marketing shenanigans go, two Playboy bunnies feigning enjoyment of the product in question is pretty damn effective (if they happen to have, y’know, left most of their clothes behind). The wacky funsters behind 2011‘s copious blood-bleeding brawler Mortal Kombat knew this, and joined forces -well,... Read More
As we saw in the last installment, those shenanigans with the Batman: Arkham Origins promotional standee showed just some of the crazies that will feature in the new title. The Joker, Deathstroke and Black Mask are thus far confirmed as a few of the renegade badasses from the depths of the devil’s... Read More
How many video games are such massive assholes that they have a medical malady named after them? Tetris, that’s how many. The nefarious ‘Tetris Syndrome,’ which sent those damn shapes cascading down our bloodshot eyelids (from the inside) long after our craptacular, chunky enough to serve as a... Read More
I found this trailer for Grand Theft Auto V to be much more entertaining that most action movie trailers. It too has cars, guns, and girls, but it also has compelling characters and a sense of humor. I know it's not really fair to compare any film to a video game, but comparing trailers between the two... Read More
Ah, Watch Dogs. You continue to beguile us with these occasional glimpses into your technology-tastic futuristic Chicago. Much like Katy Perry and her interminable cleavage shows. How long until this charade ends, in a glorious cascade of molten enjoyment and revelation? Well, many months, if the... Read More
Who hasn’t always thought this? Nobody we know, that’s for goddamn sure. Fortunately, as is unerringly the case in today’s technology-tastic world, there’s an app for that. Which is to say, there’s a demented Japanese game (where else but the home of vending machines full of panties and other... Read More
This week’s gaming shenanigans return us to an issue (an issue that makes nerds issue in a tissue, if you will) that amazed many of our youthful selves back in the nineties: Lara Croft’s magnificent boobitude. It’s sure been a strenuous quest from two twin sacks full of jagged, jagged triangular... Read More
Well, maybe not that last bit. We could be optimistic and cross our fingers, toes, and balls that this thing won’t cost about as much as the entire national debt of Sub-Saharan Africa. But, as Grandpa Egotastic always told us (before we had to take him to that home because of his new getting his dick... Read More
