Nicki Minaj

Nicki Minaj Cleavy See Through Asstastic for Jolly Old England

Nicki Minaj is taking Britain by storm. She made that boy cry in Ireland the other night by sheer force of her amazingly sized cleavetastic, then hopped across the small pond to Birmingham to bring her booty and tooty show to England proper. I can’t imagine it was too long ago that a stage show and wardrobe such as Nicki’s would have had her kicked out of the country and forbidden to come back. Thankfully, so many of us have evolved in the past many decades to understand that pop music is made mostly tolerable by the presence of hot T&A.

Nicki’s heaving cleave and booty shook throughout the entire ninety minutes of her musical performance slash exotic dancing show. Everybody seemed more than pleased in the audience. Isn’t that the only thing that should matter? Well, that and the rise in the number of babies born nine months post-show. You need to let your steam out somewhere. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI

Nicki Minaj Almost Spills Out Of Her Dress While Shooting A New Music Video In LA

Nicki Minaj was practically falling out of her skin tight dress while shooting her new music video. The singer/mother of my future children was wearing a dress that was cut WAY low. Like, just north of the nips low. Nicki has bot a magnificent pair of chi chis. They are big and beautiful and I for one would like to give them a squeeze. But I resist the urge because that’s how you end up in prison. No, I would rather wait for the day when Nicki spots me at some fancy Hollywood party and asks me to touch her ta-tas in the broom closet. And I will comply because I am a gentleman and I won’t like to disappoint a lady.

This is my big plan. I’ve been planning it for years. Now I just need to get an invite to a big Hollywood party.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/Splash

The Best of Busty and Booty, a Nicki Minaj Birthday Tribute

Lust her or despise her, turning thirty-two today Nicki Minaj is hard not to notice. Just something ever so subtle about her curves, tops and bottoms, forever hanging out of her form fitting and low cut, high cut clothing. Why not celebrate Nicki’s birthday with a sweet and sultry look down mammary lane at some of the best photos of her splendid curves. That was a rhetorical question.

The better parts of Nicki Minaj are so much better than cake. Though you may still blow out the candles if you happen to be alone and the lights are down. Happy Birthday, Nicki.

Photo Credit: FameFlyNet / Getty Images / Splash News / PCN / / GSI

Jennifer Lopez, Charli XCX, Selena Gomez Highlight the 2014 American Music Awards Red Carpet Hotties

As usual, I’m forced to take back all my mockery of the musical craptastic that is the American Music Awards. As always, the 2014 version may be a celebration of some true auditory torture, but it remains one of the single biggest night of decked out Hollywood hotties goodness of the year. There’s something to be said for that. That thing is mostly just ‘thanks’. Wow, the process of sextastic pop divas and celebrity invites was just unending tonight.

Some of my favorites were Jennifer Lopez, just so smoking hot, Charli XCX ogle worthy for sure, Selena Gomez form fitting goodness, Kate Beckinsale, Heidi Klum, Kendall Jenner, Nicki Minaj, Zendaya Coleman and many more looking outrageously fine. Check out the ladies. If you watch the show, well, that’s on you. I’d keep it on mute, then you might have something to store in the visual vaults. Enjoy.

Nicki Minaj and Ariana Grande Booty and Boobtastic Steal the MTV European Music Awards

You can only imagine the craptastic aural sensations emanating from the European version of the MTV Music Awards in Scotland over the weekend. Take all the horrible music of MTV America and multiple it by the further horridness that is Euro pop and you have some idea of the google times infinity levels of musical travesty. On the other hand, well, with lousy music comes hot women. It’s sort of axiomatic.

And those ladies showed up to flaunt, present, and perform at the awards show including Nicki Minaj, all curvy crazy, Ariana Grande looking her tushie finest in her show get up, Jordan Dunn, just superbly cleavetastic, and Charli XCX strutting her brunette hottie stuff. It’s a show about music, but if you turn the volume down and just focus on the amazingly hot looking ladies, it’s more than tolerable. But seriously, don’t turn the volume up or your brain will turn to a combination of strained peas and clotted cream. Enjoy.

Nicki Minaj Flashes Underboob and Her Undercarriage in Paris

Nicki Minaj can’t easily contain her curvaceous body so I suppose it made sense that she no longer really bothers trying. The Anaconda musical arts genius and all around bootylicious diva took to the clubs in Paris over the weekend flashing a good part of her underboob and tossing her thumper around like she meant to hurt somebody. The thing I admire about Nicki, she doesn’t do anything halfway.

While half the French people in attendance were trying to besmirch Nicki and plastic American culture, the other half were trying to get in eyeshot, if not handshot, of the hourglass figured superstar with the memorable shapes. Hey, there’s always time for besmirching once the music stops. Personally, I think Nicki makes a great ambassador of American culture. We are the shake it, you won’t break it kind of country. Enjoy.

Nicki Minaj Mighty Booty Shakes, Thumps, and Bites in ‘Anaconda’

Okay, the entirety of the Anaconda song is quite craptastic, and the video, well, it’s inane, save for one large game-changing element — massive Nicki Minaj and friends booty. But especially Nicki’s. That Thor’s Hammer of a thumper steals the show in this otherwise mindless and quite shoddily produced musical homage to Sir Mix-A-Lot I suppose. Not sure.

I do know that few on this planet have an asstastic like Nicki’s that can make it move like that. Sure, some parts of it are artificially augmented, but this is Hollywood, the show, the movies, things are fake and still often quite compelling. There really aren’t any guardians in our galaxy. But for two hours I bought into that happily. So too am I buying into the idea of playing paddleball with Nicki’s mighty behind being the paddle and me being the ball on the string. I can’t believe I managed to say that with using the word testicles. Enjoy.