Katy Perry

Katy Perry Will Not Show You Her Boobs (But in Spandex This Time)

It's a new twist on the hide the big boobtastic trick from Katy Cocktease. And this time she looks even better than before.

The pop diva and well-endowed hottie took to hills of L.A. over the Easter weekend for a little fast walking in a tight Spandex workout gear. Katy smiled because she knew she looked great. Or, because she knew now we really couldn't see her mums. Little does she know of our strong fetish for all things Spandex on curvy girls. Or maybe she does know. Argh, with Katy Cocktease I feel like she's always one step ahead of us. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba, Katy Perry, and Selena Gomez Highlight the Innocent Hotness at the Kid’s Choice Awards

There's a reason we don't let tweens vote, or drive, or have money, or, in the modern world, have children of their own. They make some bad decisions. Yes, with adults coming in a close second no doubt in terms of taste. But middle schoolers, wow, they really have some floundering taste. When Nickelodeon lets the kids decide each year to pass out awards to their favorite celebrities, you can count on two things -- first, a bunch of kids from the teen TV machines will be dressed shiny and innocent to accept awards, and, second, Katy Perry will be showing some cleavage. (Oh, also, the least fat Kardashian sister will be in attendance, which, actually turned out to be Khloe this year, of all unexpected surprises.)

Still, the hotties do show up, teens and former teen stars alike, including hot mom Jessica Alba, the aforementioned Katy Cocktease, Selena Gomez pretending she isn't in the very raunchy Spring Breakers out in theaters, Bella Thorne, Debby Ryan, and a bunch more. All looking their cutesy best for the kids. I'm sure somebody got slimed. Oh, boy. Enjoy.

Katy Perry Boobs, Maria Menounos Sextastic Figure, and Rihanna Hotness Lead Highlights on the 2013 Grammy Award Red Carpet

Let's cut right to the chase, err, cleavage.

While there were a number of sweet music industry and celebrity hotties strutting their fineries on the crimson walkway at the 2013 Grammy Awards tonight, once we saw Katy Cocktease flashes her boobs, it was really hard to concentrate on the other gals at the party, let alone remember our own names. I even stopped drinking a beer, mid-beer mind you, when I saw her sweater puppies barely covered in her evening gown.

Still, there was other noteworthy arrivals at the Grammy Awards, including Maria Menounos, who can't not look hot, Rihanna, who probably was put together finer than any other ladies tonight, Chrissy Teigen who we not so secretly lust, Taylor Swift, looking all grow'd up, Jennifer Lopez flashing serious MILF leg, Kat Dennings who brought her own racktastic display tonight, and several others. Check them all out. It's the kind of music we love, less sound, more sweet hot harmonies. Enjoy.

Katy Perry Red White and Boobtastic for the Children at D.C. Inaugural Event

Let's start by saying, this was an event related to military service and so we are not in any way disparaging the event dubbed the 'Children's Party' in Washington over the weekend where Katy Cocktease flashed her cleavage in patriotic colors galore as she pranced about and sang her little ditties in celebration of the Presidential Inauguration.  However, we do often wonder if Katy Cocktease has a middling area when it comes to costumes, not that we're complaining when it comes to her appearances for grown ups (albiet her typical concert goer is quite the young lady, and my friend Tubby Atkins, who probably ought to be arrested at some point).

Still, there was no denying that American pride was in the air, along with a few dads up in the rafters trying to look down Katy's top, as excitement builds and builds over the inauguration, which is any time now I'm told, and I fully intend to catch, or maybe get a recap on, after a little couch nap time. Enjoy.

Katy Perry and Ciara Body Hugging Suits for Billboard Women in Music Awards

Women in Music is a topic we sure do love, well, not the music side necessarily, but the women of the music world, the sextastic divas, yes, they do deserve accolades. So we too applauded when Katy Cocktease and Ciara both showed up to the awards in some curvy-figure hugging dresses, leaving little to the imagination (although, ironically, when somebody says a dress leaves little to the imagination, that's when men imagine the most).

Katy Cocktease in tantalizing red, Ciara and her vastly under-appreciated body in black, and little room betwixt skin and fabric and just about perfect for curvaceous displays.

It's like music to our eyes. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez and Katy Perry Form Two Hot Parts of an Ultimate Sextastic Dream Sandwich

Wow, talk what kind of bread you want around your meat this lunch hour, the freshly single (though still in the dark grasps of The Devil's Midget), Selena Gomez flashing some seriously good looks, alongside the busty Katy Cocktease, the two pop stars promoting goodness and bangability at a UNICEF event in The Big Apple last night.

Now, I know this whole threesome action thing can be kind of tricky. The last time I engaged in such behavior I ended up with two plus-sized girls yelling at me to go get them some more booze at the store and give them some privacy while they got it on, so, it's tricky, no doubt. You need some planning, some X's and O's on the chalkboard in the locker room before the game. Lots of preparation and sweat. But for my belusted Selena Gomez and the truly needing-to-be-exposed Katy Cocktease, you've just got to go that extra mile. There's no 'i' in the word 'team'. Enjoy.

Katy Perry Skintight Leopard Dress Couldn’t Put the Lakers Over the Hump (Though Speaking of Humping…)

Alas, the re-tooled and re-stocked Los Angeles Lakers could not transform the power of the Katy Cocktease body faptastic into a victory last night (or, less alas, you know, if you happen to be a Mavericks fan or don't like the Lakers). But it's worth noting that no matter how hot a super Hollywood body tease you have rooting for your team, you do still need to play some defense on the court.

Now, there's no doubt in our mind that if Katy were to finally flash her bare udders, the Lakers probably would've won by 40 to 80 points in a blowout of historical proportions. But, just like a pump fake without an actual follow-up shot, Katy's attention grabbers without the real action led to underwhelming scoring. Enjoy.