Katy Perry

Katy Perry, Smurfette, and Cancun: It’s Like a Fantasy Come True

I'd be lying if I said I never had a romantic thought about various female cartoon characters. Sure they don't end up showing much, but neither does Katy Cocktease and I can never peel her away from my dreams either.

Katy was in Cancun for a promotional event for Smurfs 2 (I know, who hasn't been counting the days until that film arrives), flashing some cleavage, and making Smurfette wonder if she could've got her own gig had she been willing to show 90%, but never all, of her female form.

Alas, it probably doesn't work for blue midgets as well as hottie pop divas, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't smurf it. Enjoy.

Is Katy Perry Using Butt Cheats? Whoa, Cocktease, Not Cool!

You know how torn we I am over Katy Perry. On one hand, I've had more than one Teenage Dream about the chesty pop star. On the other hand, her refusal to ever show her bare boobtastic has left us calling her, well, Katy Cocktease, for several years now.

But, now this. While we can't confirm the use of butt-aides on the part of Katy to give her rump more depth, spotting her in Spandex on her way to work out it sure as heck looks like there might be a foreign object in her dumper area. And we don't mean a French man. It sure looks like a badonkadonk curve enhancement device. We definitely need a little Ego CSI action on this front, err, back. Enjoy.

Katy Perry Will Not Show You Her Boobs (But in Spandex This Time)

It's a new twist on the hide the big boobtastic trick from Katy Cocktease. And this time she looks even better than before.

The pop diva and well-endowed hottie took to hills of L.A. over the Easter weekend for a little fast walking in a tight Spandex workout gear. Katy smiled because she knew she looked great. Or, because she knew now we really couldn't see her mums. Little does she know of our strong fetish for all things Spandex on curvy girls. Or maybe she does know. Argh, with Katy Cocktease I feel like she's always one step ahead of us. Enjoy.

Jessica Alba, Katy Perry, and Selena Gomez Highlight the Innocent Hotness at the Kid’s Choice Awards

There's a reason we don't let tweens vote, or drive, or have money, or, in the modern world, have children of their own. They make some bad decisions. Yes, with adults coming in a close second no doubt in terms of taste. But middle schoolers, wow, they really have some floundering taste. When Nickelodeon lets the kids decide each year to pass out awards to their favorite celebrities, you can count on two things -- first, a bunch of kids from the teen TV machines will be dressed shiny and innocent to accept awards, and, second, Katy Perry will be showing some cleavage. (Oh, also, the least fat Kardashian sister will be in attendance, which, actually turned out to be Khloe this year, of all unexpected surprises.)

Still, the hotties do show up, teens and former teen stars alike, including hot mom Jessica Alba, the aforementioned Katy Cocktease, Selena Gomez pretending she isn't in the very raunchy Spring Breakers out in theaters, Bella Thorne, Debby Ryan, and a bunch more. All looking their cutesy best for the kids. I'm sure somebody got slimed. Oh, boy. Enjoy.

Katy Perry Boobs, Maria Menounos Sextastic Figure, and Rihanna Hotness Lead Highlights on the 2013 Grammy Award Red Carpet

Let's cut right to the chase, err, cleavage.

While there were a number of sweet music industry and celebrity hotties strutting their fineries on the crimson walkway at the 2013 Grammy Awards tonight, once we saw Katy Cocktease flashes her boobs, it was really hard to concentrate on the other gals at the party, let alone remember our own names. I even stopped drinking a beer, mid-beer mind you, when I saw her sweater puppies barely covered in her evening gown.

Still, there was other noteworthy arrivals at the Grammy Awards, including Maria Menounos, who can't not look hot, Rihanna, who probably was put together finer than any other ladies tonight, Chrissy Teigen who we not so secretly lust, Taylor Swift, looking all grow'd up, Jennifer Lopez flashing serious MILF leg, Kat Dennings who brought her own racktastic display tonight, and several others. Check them all out. It's the kind of music we love, less sound, more sweet hot harmonies. Enjoy.

Katy Perry Red White and Boobtastic for the Children at D.C. Inaugural Event

Let's start by saying, this was an event related to military service and so we are not in any way disparaging the event dubbed the 'Children's Party' in Washington over the weekend where Katy Cocktease flashed her cleavage in patriotic colors galore as she pranced about and sang her little ditties in celebration of the Presidential Inauguration.  However, we do often wonder if Katy Cocktease has a middling area when it comes to costumes, not that we're complaining when it comes to her appearances for grown ups (albiet her typical concert goer is quite the young lady, and my friend Tubby Atkins, who probably ought to be arrested at some point).

Still, there was no denying that American pride was in the air, along with a few dads up in the rafters trying to look down Katy's top, as excitement builds and builds over the inauguration, which is any time now I'm told, and I fully intend to catch, or maybe get a recap on, after a little couch nap time. Enjoy.

Katy Perry and Ciara Body Hugging Suits for Billboard Women in Music Awards

Women in Music is a topic we sure do love, well, not the music side necessarily, but the women of the music world, the sextastic divas, yes, they do deserve accolades. So we too applauded when Katy Cocktease and Ciara both showed up to the awards in some curvy-figure hugging dresses, leaving little to the imagination (although, ironically, when somebody says a dress leaves little to the imagination, that's when men imagine the most).

Katy Cocktease in tantalizing red, Ciara and her vastly under-appreciated body in black, and little room betwixt skin and fabric and just about perfect for curvaceous displays.

It's like music to our eyes. Enjoy.