Katie Price (Jordan)

Oh, Katie Price, I Can Think of Two Things I Love About You

And not altogether much else. Nevertheless, Katie Price, the Britty TV reality personality and former singer slash model slash drunken party girl who likes to flash her cleavage was back at it again in announcing the launch of hew new swimwear line which I think is called Wet Ho or something like that.

More importantly, Katie put her less than natural funbags into the mix, proving that you too can look hot in your swimsuit if only you have monstrous flesh puppies. Or maybe they're chlorine resistant. In either case, don't expect to see the British Olympic Swim Team wearing Katie's designs this summer in London. Enjoy.

Katie Price Pimps Her Double Dipper Stripper Look at Her Reality Television Launch

Well, we did post Phoebe Price earlier today, so it only seems fair to give the unrelated Katie Price, the self-promoting pimpstress across the pond, an equal amount of the attention she so dearly craves.  (And the bustier and garter and panties don't hurt our charitable hearts.)

Katie Price launches a lot of projects. I'm not exactly sure what or where these projects lead, because outside of her spank bank potential, she seems to have little commercial viability. Nevertheless, such talent deficits never stopped the Kardashians, so onward and downward into reality television goes Katie Price with the launch of her new show, Signed by Katie Price. Granted, the Anna Nicole Smith show was quite popular, so there is precedent for large funbagged bleached blondes  to get drunk and fall down on TV and eyeballs to gaze, but you really do need to up the personal train-wreck quotient for this to work. Anna Nicole upped it a bit too far you might say. The only assumption we can make about Katie Price and her show -- anticipate many wardrobe malfunctions, either accidental or planned. Then, and only then, we might just tune in to the telly.  Enjoy.

Katie Price Cleave-Launches Her Eponymous Magazine in London

Seems like just yesterday we were conducting an impromptu OB/GYN examination of Katie Price following a late night drunken rip-fest at a London nightclub; now, just a few days later, the glamour model and (former) football player plow girl has decided to expose her inner most thoughts and dreams on the pages of her self-titled magazine, 'Katie'; I think it's sort of like Oprah's 'O' magazine, except less fat. It's hard to imagine there'd be much within the pages of 'Katie' worth discovering, but, we try not to judge a book by its cover, just look at all the vulvatastic schematics we found out about Katie on her latest upskirt. Enjoy.

When Katie Price Drinks, She Gets Loose Lips

 

CLICK HERE TO SEE THE UNCOVERED KAITE PRICE FLAPPERS

Look, far be it from Egotastic! to criticize one hot mess from slipping into something see-through, getting blinkered drunk with her polo playing boyfriend, spilling an endless series of cocktails on her dress, then clutzily climbing into her party limousine with her legs spreads, providing an upskirt view of panties not quite broad enough to cover her smackeroous majorus, therein snapped heartily by the local paparazzi.

Okay, I take that back, we can certainly criticize the polo playing boyfriend; I mean, c'mon Katie Price, a.k.a., Jordan, has bedded down any number of famous British footballers, as all nutty glamour models with distinctly girthy funbags really should; it's really a matter of tradition. But a polo player? Well, I suppose something is making this lady swelleth in her nest, so perhaps it's all good. Enjoy.

Snake Hole

What's long, skinny and gripped by Renee Olstead? (Buzznet)

Leighton Meester takes her nipple pokes for a walk. (Celebuzz)

Kim Kardashian goes for a stroll in a short skirt. (INF)

Katie Price injects some cleavage into the literary world. (SocialiteLife)

Denise Richards talks about lesbionic experimenting. (HuffPo)

Jennifer Aniston and Courteney Cox got around. (FoxNews)

Odette Yustman looking all hot and whatnot. (GossipCenter)

Late Night Legs

Sexy Blake Lively hits up The Tonight Show. (GossipCenter)

Jennifer Lopez flashes her sweet legs. (Celebuzz)

Christina Hendricks is on fire. Literally. (FoxNews)

Laura Vandervoot sexes up the red carpet. (Popoholic)

Why did Crystal Harris ditch Hugh Hefner? (HuffPo)

New movie with Rashida Jones, Elizabeth Banks and Zooey Deschanel. (LaineyGossip)

What won't Katie Price do? (SocialiteLife)

Elton John Gets All The Hot Women To His Oscar Viewing Party

Elton John and his new baby daddy hosted another of the big Oscar parties this year, a viewing shindig for a bunch of folks also not making the cut for the Academy Awards, but definitely making my refined list of girls I'd like to imagine being slapped by after I ask them if they like meat products.

Odette Yustman just looked super Yusty and sexy, Kim Kardashian she-bot appeared with extra spit and polish and perfect boobage, Charlotte Ross continues her medically induced age defying aweseomeness, Malin Akerman remains an underrated comedic hottie, Petra Nemcova just one damn super supermodel, Katie Price, previously known as the Jordan who made me drool excessively, Dianna Agron, irrepressible Glee breakout babe, and a reunion of the only straight reason for me to own the High School Musical DVD box set, petite hotties Ashley Tisdale and Vanessa Hudgens. Now, that's what I call a party! Enjoy.

Photo credit: Fame / Splash News