Audrina Patridge

Audrina Patridge Bikini Pictures For the Mele Kalikimaka Sextastic

Audrina Patridge may often be at a loss for words that make sense in her native tongue, but she’s never without her wicked hard bikini body. She takes it with her everywhere, including Hawaii over the weekend where the former Hills star showed off in not one, but two different cleavage and booty baring little two-pieces for the benefit of gentleman ogler’s in the 50th state.

I’d go ahead and slap a photo of her tush cheeks on a tourism board brochure right now. I’m just about ready to drop everything and jet off to the islands to catch her cans in wiggly motion. It could only get better if her hot mom was there with her (we’ll keep an eye out for that). Enjoy.

Bella Twins and Audrina Patridge Busting Out the Busty Hotness for Vegas Pimping

It’s getting to be serious pimping time in Sin City, heading toward Christmas and New Years when Las Vegas really goes big. So a couple of big guns were brought in the form of the outstanding Bella Twins who brought out their chesty goodness to promote the opening of the Sugar Factory in Town’s Square. I’m not sure what the Sugar Factory is, I just now I’d like to spend a day there with the Bella Twins developing lots of cavities.

The Bellagio hired Audrina Patridge to put on something low cut and slinky and leathery naughty and pimp one of their entertainment venues. Again, I have no idea what it was, I just know I want to spend the evening there with Audrina and see if leather really is warm in the winter and cool in the summer. A second skin to unwrap. She did look quite good. I hope they got their money’s worth. Enjoy.

Audrina Patridge Wears a Leather Cleavy Dress at Hyde Bellagio in Vegas

Audrina Patridge Bikini Pictures for the Girl Who’s Good at Looking Good

Audrina Patridge may not be the most successful Hills graduate, but she’s certainly been the most focused. She looks good in a bikini. That’s it. No more. No less. No working outside the box, let alone thinking outside anything. No empire aspirations or searches for real jobs or things that require too much firing up of the old noodle. Just looking good in a bikini. And she does that so very well.

Caught on the beach in Miami off the clock, Audrina candidly still looks quite amazing in her two piece swimsuit. It’s a talent. It’s not broad or deep or flexible, or really applicable to any purpose other than the grand mission we all join together herein each day. One fine ogling opportunity. Sometimes, the simplest things (or girls) in life are truly the best. Enjoy.

Audrina Patridge in Yoga Pants Should Make Me Happier (Why Am I Not Happier?)

Because Audrina Patridge is clearly wearing panties beneath her thin stretchy black yoga pants. Silky lacy little things, no doubt, but still, where will our camel toes of tomorrow come from if our sextastic celebrities begin wearing undergarments beneath their stretch pants? You know I only bring up cultural matters when they are of the utmost significance.

I dig Audrina Patridge. If she learned the Quiet Game, she could be the perfect girlfriend. One killer hot body, good looks, the whole package, But if she’s going to be part of this un-commando revolution taking place in Hollywood right now, I might just have to actually throw her out of bed. Enjoy.

Audrina Patridge Has a Body Built for Visual Pleasure

There’s a lot to be said for Audrina Patridge the person, her smile, and.. her smile, and the way that she smiles. But if we can get past the many complexities of her personality for just a bit, I think we’d all see how super good looking and ridiculously hot bodied she really is. Let’s stop looking at character for a moment and look at T&A. She deserves that.

In the new edition of The Stndrd Magazine, Audrina stretches out her amazingly sextastic form for some truly memorable moments of photographic wonderment. I mean, she really is a stunner. So, yes, sometimes when she talks the words don’t make all that much sense. But the Quiet Game is a perfectly acceptable pursuit to play with Audrina while simply delighting in what she does have in spades — lust inducement. Enjoy.

Audrina Patridge Bikini Pictures Hula Hoop Their Way Into Your Heart

Audrina Patridge looks amazing in a bikini. You don’t need to say much else about Audrina Patridge. I’m not sure there is much else. But as a core competency, she nails it.

Now, you start throwing in some props and implements like a hula hoop, and the tasty hotness bikini factor only increases. I’m not sure what it is about grown hot women playing childish games, but there’s always something extra sextastic about it. If you’re not imagining Audrina setting the World Record with seventeen hours of straight hula hooping in your bedroom in her bikini (or less), you need to take your libido into the shop for some tuning. Enjoy.