In my next life, I’m coming back as the paddle board Abbey Clancy favors with her wet, hot, bikini clad body. Or maybe her bikini. Or just her husband. Something or somebody that gets to be intimately close to this stunning lingerie model, TV personality, and hottie WAG.
Abbey continues her multi bikini vacation in Maui, causing necks to strain along the beach and male orcas to get painful swelling in their nether regions out in the warm waters offshore. Abbey is such an underrated hottie, I wish I could hold her hand as we went on a publicity tour around the world raising the awareness level of her sextastic. Naturally, she’d be nekkid to help expedite the campaign. Or one of these killer bikinis that seem to have been dropped down from heaven just for Abbey to wear. Enjoy.
While I never quite gave my authorization for Abigail Clancy to switch out of her two piece hot wear, I must give her credit for finding a one piece suit that still flatters her body and even allowed her nipples to reach for the vacation sun.
With the World Cup coming up, I expect to see much more of Abigail Clancy. I don’t mean at the World Cup, her husband isn’t going this time. I mean, I’ll be looking at lots of pictures of her wicked hot goodness during some of the more lengthy scoreless matches during the Cup. You do need a break from those 0-0 ties during regulation at times. Abigail Clancy is the perfect break. Oh, my, yes, she is. Enjoy.
With the World Cup coming upon us like a tidal wave of the world’s most watched sport, you’re certain to see tons of lists of the world’s hottest soccer WAGs. I don’t like superlative lists, but as a general rule, if you don’t see Abigail Clancy on the list, turn away from thine weak-arsed literature. Lingerie model and soccer wife Abbey Clancy is just one peach of a bikini treat, this time flaunting her A-list female form in Maui, a little present to the 50th State of America where I hope she decides to move one day. I happen to know the apartment next to mine is vacant. The tenants made some big fuss about the unyielding sounds of what seemed like felines in great distress coming through their walls and they just up and left. Go figure.
Abigail Clancy, you and I have a date with destiny. Hopefully, in the form of bikini shopping. Unlike most men who get fidgety during shopping, I could watch you try on bikinis and thongs for up to three years without the urge to move. I get catatonic for the sextastic. And Abbey Clancy in a bikini, whoa, baby, I feel a sudden rush of voluntary muscle disablement coming on. Enjoy.
I never much get past Palm Springs adjacent for my vacations. And, by Palm Springs adjacent, I mean the first Native American desert casino that offers free drinks at the low dollar card tables. But hot model and WAG types like Abigail Clancy get to go to Dubai for their thrice a season holidays, to show off their wicked hot bikini bodies, and in the case of Abbey Clancy, one stellar fine and perfectly yoked booty.
Man, her thumper deserves exotic holidays to far away lands. Why not share a gift of that magnitude with the entire world. I’ve never thought the Middle East made for a particularly awesome vacation destination, but sextastic women are internationally accepted and reversed. If anybody or anything can bring understanding across borders, it’s Abigail’s derriere in a tiny thong bikini. Just picture perfect. And caress perfect. And a couple other things perfect that would require a sketch drawing for me to explain properly. Booty! Enjoy.
I tend never to get further than Vegas for my big winter vacation, but if you’re wicked hot and a WAG and lingerie model like Abigail Clancy, you get a resort in Dubai for your holidays. Not that you don’t deserve it. Or earn it once you get there. Even the people who didn’t have to pay for it get the benefits of seeing your ridiculously hot body in not one, but two different smoking sextastic bikinis:
It’s almost unfair really when a slender hottie with perfect ta’s takes to the sandy shores in her equally perfect exhibitionist two piece swimsuits. But unfair is so much better than fair. Unfair envelops me in a familiar warmth, much like I would like to wrap Abigail Clancy in if I had the chance. I mean, familiar warmth, pushy sweaty hug, same difference, right? Enjoy.
Fancy fashion parties are always extremely dull, until the first hottie flashing tons of sideboob shows up to the event. That would be sextastic WAG and model Abigail Clancy who arrived right on cue for the queue at the Fashion for the Brave event in London, showing off a solid amount of chestal goodness.
Oh, I know what you’re saying, it’s not so super much of a reveal. But trust me, when you’re sipping on champagne and munching on cucumber sandwiches at the world’s most boring party, you will be spending between 70-90% of your personal RAM capacity on ogling Abigail’s funbags. Leering is a relative sport. The head turns naturally to the most alluring visual wonderment in any room. It’s nature’s way of tweaking your neck. Enjoy.