Tom Hardy’s ‘Venom’ Makes His Teaser Trailer Debut (VIDEO)

Hey, did you ever want to hear Tom Hardy do an Ice-T impression for an extended period of time? Well, get your tickets for Venom in October, because it sounds like everyone's favorite mumbler is going so far as to over-enunciate to the point where he sounds like everyone's favorite Law & Order detective. It's jarring, especially if you were expecting more of Hardy's signature unintelligibleness. 

So Venom. They should call it Spider-Man: Without, amirite? Look, nobody outside of fat white guys who made Venom popular through a series of t-shirts in the late 90s gives a crap about this character. We were all intrigued by the notion of Tom Hardy playing the character, but not in his own movie. All I kept thinking the entire time I watched this trailer was, "How do you sentimentalize a character like Eddie Brock?" I don't know quite how they're going to do that yet. Probably by giving him a baby daughter he's trying to go straight for. Or something.

Look, it's from the director of Gangster Squad and 30 Minutes or Less, so grab those expectations of yours and drag them way, way down. Down to the ground. And then keep going. Tom Hardy's Ice-T's Venom is due in theaters on October 5.