Maybe in 2015 I’ll finally come to understand WTF this bottled water company is doing shooting hot models daily in bikinis, lingerie, or less, and not actually selling any water. It sounds like a sinister enough plan to meet sextastic ladies that I should have thought of it first. Oh, yeah, Bill’s Nekkid Water, come on, ladies, get into your Nekkid costumes and let’s promote the shizz out of the bottles I fill in my sink. It just might work, though my evil schemes do tend to fail at a rather astonishing rate.
The opposite of fail is the delicioous Kat Torres preening in her little black lace lingerie for the cameras. Water, vitamins, rabid pit bulls, I’d buy anything Kat Torres in silk and lace was selling. I have a hard time saying no to fully dressed women. This, well, just tell me what my order is and I’ll hand over my Discover card for a swiping. We are but lambs before the hottie slaughter. Enjoy.
Kylie Minogue has been providing visual treats for the male of the species for so long now it’s almost hard to put into numbers. Sure, she’s also made some music and done some shows and movies and theatrical stuff as well, but it’s her hot blonde teasy goodness through the years that has made this sextastic Aussie a standout in the tingly feelings delivered all-time category.
In her latest incarnation, Kylie is hot body pimping Sloggi lingerie, which seems like lingerie for grown up women, sextastic grown up women, who want to feel and look alluring to their mates or just the passing gentleman ogler such as myself. It works. Will you see some of these young V.S. models still pulling off lingerie photoshoots with such passion inducing aplomb in twenty-five more years? I do not know. I do know at 46 I’d still love to whisk Kylie away to a log cabin in the woods filled only with lingerie and perhaps some chamomile tea. We won’t be needing the tea. Enjoy.
Check Out the Behind the Scenes Video »
Lucy Ford in transparent underwear and covered topless? Yes, please! (Drunken Stepfather)
Kim Kardashian steals Kylie’s bikini and looks equally as hot. (TMZ)
Former Playmate Tiffany Fallon can barely cover her funbags. (Hollywood Tuna)
When did Shailene Woodley turn into this leggy bombshell in GQ? (Popoholic)
Major Lady Gaga sideboob alert! (The Superficial)
Barbara Palvin is nekkid in Marie Claire Italy. (COED)
Do you want to see 23 year old Carrie Fisher‘s sideboob in that metal bikini? Of course you do! (Moviepilot)
You may recall Michea Crawford from that epic squash court short form video. Or now you can recall her as the super hottie in the lingerie pimping all kinds of lace and silk and sextastic. There’s just something about this Michea lovely lady that exudes all kinds of alluring midichlorians or pheromones or something that makes me feel like I’m super hungry but I don’t want food. That’s the mark of an Egotastic! winner.
In a more enlightened society all women would wear lingerie about and we would name the most passion inducing our queen and leader. You might not agree with her policies, but you’d always approve of her positions. I don’t want to shake up society that much, but this little change will improve lives. Enjoy.
Ukraine happens to be a land of many gaggles of super fine young women. So many of the world’s top supermodels hail from the Ukrainian lands. Like Anna Andres who was recently crowned Miss Ukraine to be competing in the Miss Universe pageant. They don’t just hand out that title to any shlub off the streets of Kiev. Oh, no, just check out Anna’s curriculum vitae by way of this steaming sextastic pictorial in the new edition of GQ Russia. Wow, as to the brunette, triple wow as to everything that lay beneath the hair line.
Someday, I’d like to be a judge in one of these world class pageants. Naturally I’d be fair and just and unbiased and treat all the contestants equally. I mean, among the group that refused my salacious advances obviously. The girls who let me play with their toes would naturally receive some higher marks in the contribution to society scoring. There’s fair and then there’s practical. I can be fairly easily bought. Oh, Anna, please do buy me. Enjoy.
My ultimate nap would be to lay down in the bosomy embrace of Kelly Brook and sleep for days. Well, perhaps five minutes of exploring each other’s intimate limits until my heart rate goes past the red line limit indicated on the stationary bike at the gym. Then, to sleep for days in her warm welcoming boobtastic. Captured behind the scenes of her 2015 wall calendar shoot, Kelly Brook shows you why in black and white or color or just the heavenly scratch and sniff option, she really is one of the most heavenly bodies currently residing on the earth’s surface.
Kelly Brook in see-through little bits of clothing, bending, posing, preening for the camera. It’s almost impossible to wait for 2015. I’ll set my nap time in betwixt her engorged funbags to 1/1/15 so I can wake up atop her chest to the site of her on my wall. I’m doubling down on this fantasy. There’s no stopping me during the holiday season. Enjoy.
I guess the 138 water models have moved off the beach today and on location in Hollywood for some lacy lingerie shoots for attempt number five-hundred to push fancy bottled water by way of super hot skin baring models like Kat Torres. I have no idea how it’s working sales wise on product, I’ve never ever seen anyone buying this H20, but I can tell you it continues to work plenty fine in the libido revving of the engines department, with this wickedly hot blonde Kat Torres nearly catching fire in red lace and nearly baring fun parts.
We may never know the real motivations behind all of these pimping bottled water shoots. Ours may not be to question, only to ogle and try not to embarrass ourselves in public settings. I’m fine with that. All the world’s a stage and we have the very best seats in the house. Enjoy.