FHM magazine Posts:

Esmeralda Alvarez Covered Topless and Beachy Hot for FHM

Well hello there, hot beach girl. I do so love the Latin ladies at the shore, almost to the precise same extent as they ignore me back. But I shall never quit, not so long as the look the sultry look Esmeralda Alvarez looking so wicked model hot in FHM Spain.

Esmeralda has the look of sultry come hither along the sandy shores, as if sun and surf weren't enough to drive you toward the shoreline. I'm pretty sure I've seen her in my dreams several times an evening since puberty, though this would be our first very official meeting. Welcome to Egotastic!, Esmeralda. Hang your clothes up to dry and linger awhile why don't you. Enjoy.

Julia Baus Melts the First Ice Cream Cone of the Season With Her FHM Hotness

You know how much I love the meme of hot girls licking melted ice cream cones and popsicles in the warm summer months. Well, consider this the first melted messy girl goodness pictorial of 2014. A bit early for the Northern Hemisphere, but for FHM South Africa, German model and actress Julia Baus makes it all work with dripping sextastic goodness.

What is is about oozing summer sugary treats and a wicked hot woman's licks that make for the perfect photo? Oh, I think you can arrive at your own answer to that one. Suffice it to say, it's one of those cliches that sticks around for a sticky reason. It will always work. Enjoy.

Carmen Electra Lingerie Teasy Hot in FHM

My life has kind of changed since I met Carmen Electra here in my office. I've gone from lusting after the veteran hotties to super duper lusting, realizing that the mix of continued hotness mixed with decades of learning the art o of the tease and the virtual tickle is just one magical combination. Sure, I don't mind a giggling 20-year old. But a 40-year old with a naughty mind and a demure smile and Carmen Electra's looks and body? Out of control.

Carmen is featured in the latest edition of FHM magazine from across the pond. I think they nailed everything I do so lust about Carmen. Cheeky, teasy, lingerie experienced hottie. I'd like to climb right through those pages and... enjoy.

Jorgie Porter Behind the Scenes of Her Sextastic Bunny Shoot for FHM

Jorgie Porter is no longer that hot blonde Britty babe from Hollyoaks. She's leaving the brilliant and smashing world of soap opera stardom to move on to bigger and better things. I can only hope those things include taking off her clothes and showing off her ridiculously hot body for the cameras.

Jorgie gave a little sneak peek of her bodily potential in FHM this month, in the guise of a alluring little blonde bunny with a tail I'm cottoning to something awful. Take a look behind the scenes of her shoot and see if you don't get the same itchy tingles I do thinking about Jorgie getting super racy in the next stage of her still young career. Enjoy.

Keeley Hazell Is Back (Again) and Looking Mighty Fine In My Hood

I'm not sure what excites me more, the once again return of Keeley Hazell, or the fact that I recognize the place where her most outstanding new photoshoot in FHM magazine appear and it's a mere few blocks from our penthouse offices here at Egotastic! I'm surprised my superpower sense of smell didn't pick up the hint of Hazell when she got within three land miles of my location. Must be something to do with the polar vortex, but the mere thought of Keeley in her little white shorts at my In & Out Burger place has me imagining Keeley and I embraced in a gooey double double.

Keeley keeps dropping out of modeling and then coming back. I'm not sure she's ever going to be doing glamor modeling again, as in, exposing her world class funbags, but the memories of her mighty puppies combined with her still wicked hot looks, still one of the finest babes on this here planet, let alone hanging out in my hood. I'm going out now to track her down like a bloodhound. Enjoy.

Ashley Sky Covered Topless And So Hot I Might Cry

I'm not a man who cries easily. Three times a day tops. Four the day I watched Saving Mr. Banks (damn you, Disney). But Ashley Sky and her Brazilian body domination forces my lachrymal glands, among others, to well up with anticipation of release. She's just so damn hot. And Brazil, how do you keep making these ultra fine female forms to spread around the world?

Featured in the latest edition of FHM magazine, Ashley barely covers her bodacious body, one of the most wicked hot on the planet, for a tease of extraordinary proportions. I think if you leer at Ashley for a while in this pictorial you'll begin to understand why I'm searching for Kleenex at this very moment. For my eyes, naturally. The sextastic takes its toll, one drop at a time. Enjoy.

Lucy Mecklenburgh and Linda Le Double Down the Lady Goodies for FHM

Lucy Mecklenburgh isn't just a TOWIE reality star, she's a TOWIE reality star in her barely on underwear on the pages of FHM Singapore this month. In one photo, she's even riding her bike in her bra and panties, which only goes to prove that these photographers are robbing my dreams late at night for ideas for their shoots. The bike one has been a staple of mine for some time. Lucy doesn't receive the attention she merits here across the pond, but I suspect after a few eyeball turns around her lingerie clad body ought do the trick.

Joining Lucy in the current FHM edition is Linda Le, a cosplay vampy kind of gal who prefers latex to cotton, and loves to work herself into one naughty costume after another.

This too also ripped directly from my libido. Hot Asian girl in rubber suits? I'm not sure they've yet invented a finer tandem that that particular composition. Enjoy.