michael-garcia - September 19, 2016
In honor of the wayward criminals of the comedy, Masterminds, in theaters September 30, we're taking a look at some of our world's most inept, clumsy, and dumb-ass criminals.
We've been telling you for a few weeks about an evil clown menace that's spreading through the South faster than an outbreak of herpes at a clown college. It started in South Carolina where residents say that several people dressed as clowns tried to lure kids into the woods with promises of money. Soon, this clown menace spread to neighboring Georgia and Alabama. Cops have been baffled by this crop of clown related incidents but have thus far been unable to apprehend anyone. Clowns are sneaky because they have no souls. But the crack police force in Flomaton, AL finally caught a break when they arrested Makayla Smith the so-called "clown ringleader". She is apparently the head honcho of a clown terrorist cell out of Pensacola, FL ('natch). It seems that Makayla went to far when her group went from trying to lure kids into the woods to making actual threats of violence against a local school on a Facebook page set up by the community to monitor the clown problem.Â
Makayla will more than likely be charged with making terroristic threats, a felony. The FBI is involved and she is in deep doodie. It's bad enough that I live in New York City and have to worry about run of the mill terrorists, now I have to worry about my family down South and clown terrorists? Seriously, what the hell is going on in this country?
See the Masterminds trailer.Â