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Julia Louis-Dreyfus Is One Tit Away from Perfection

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Lex Jurgen - April 10, 2014


Almost 238 years after our founding and America is still afraid of tits. I'm not sure what it is about women's breasts that scare the shit out of so many people. Yeah, I was wary of them too until about fourteen when I touched my first and realized they weren't going to send me straight to Beezelbub's cauldron, at least not immediately. At worst, you got a slap across the face. Maybe put in the punishment shed if she was a close relative. But we stand together with Iran and some other fucked up backwards places in thinking tits will cause us all to be set ablaze in hellfire. Bare asses seem to be okay now. I guess that's in one of the more recently revised versions of the Good Book.

Photo Credit: Rolling Stone

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