Rosie Jones

Happy Birthday, Rosie Jones! (Our Annual Tribute to the Epic Sextastic That Is Rosie Jones)

 
Rosie Jones Topless Birthday Salute
Click to See Uncensored

You know my all-time favorite hotties list runs about 47 single-spaced pages deep. I don’t play favorites, I would gladly drown in the sextastic bodies of any one of them. But I have made it a point to specifically remember Rosie Jones each July 19th (okay, we’re a day early) and her bountiful gifts she presents each year to millions of passion-filled men and Sapphic leaning women.

It’s hard to believe Rosie is only turning 24. This makes it six full years since we’ve seen her flashing her epic udders for our viewing pleasure. She literally started the day she turned 18, at least officially. For all you do for all of us, all those happy all over tingles, Rosie, happy birthday to you, darling. Enjoy.

Battle of the Boobtastic for the Ages: Rosie Jones Chest Thumps Rhian Sugden

 
Click to See Uncensored

Every now and then a conflict comes along that everyone must agree is absolutely righteous. I don’t mean silly rap feuds or even global nuclear showdowns, I’m talking about the important stuff. Like two titans of the tittastic, Rosie Jones and Rhian Sugden, stepping into the caged heat that is the Battle of the Boobtastic. Two lovely award winning ladies with fierce face and hot chests ready to focus on just one goal — winning. It’s really pretty moving.

I don’t envy those of you who must cast the deciding votes as to which of these naturally racktastic angels is of the higher order. The stakes are high, the breasts are real. In your humble opinion, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?

Battle of the Boobtastic: Rosie Jones vs. Rhian Sugden

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

See More Rosie and Rhian Topless Goodness »

Rosie Jones Topless Photoshoot for Zoo Magazine

 
Rosie Jones Topless Photoshoot for Zoo Magazine June 2014
Click To See Uncensored

English model and professional hot person Rosie Jones showed off her Britannic majesties for the June issue of Zoo Magazine. Rosie is very thin but has some huge funbags. We’re talking serious motorboating material here. If I had to rate her ta-tas on a scale of one to ten I’d give her an 11, like Spinal Tap but sexier. It also helps that she is seriously effing pretty. Like, strikingly so. She’s got that flirty look that makes men’s knees knock together. But she still looks approachable. She seems like the type of girl that you could have a couple of pints with at the pub and maybe have a snog in a dark corner. See all those British words I just used. I’ve watched shows on the BBC. I’m cultured.

I do enjoy the ladies of the British isles. I am drawn to their polite hotness.

Lucy Collett Chests Up to Rosie Jones for an Epic Topless Battle of the Boobtastic

 
Click to See Uncensored

Are you kidding me? Two of my favorite girls in the entire world choosing to do battle in the cage of chesty goodness simply for my prurient viewing pleasure? Wow, talk about feeling like Caesar. It’s good to be king. Or emperor. Or Senator something or other. It’s mostly just good to have two eyes and one set of… well, you know, when peeking in on the Battle of the Boobtastic between redheaded goodie basket Lucy Collett and young future HOFer in the hotness department, Rosie Jones.

I’m almost sad that one of them must go home unhappy today. But funbag justice must be served. And you must decide, between these two titans of the topless wonderments, whose ta-ta’s reign supreme?

Battle of the Boobtastic: Lucy Collett vs. Rosie Jones

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...

Check Out More Lucy and Rosie Topless Goodness »

R.I.P. Nuts Magazine: Pour Some Ta-Ta’s Out For My Lady Homies

 

As you know, we’ve had a close, almost intimate peeping relationship with the good folks at Nuts magazine across the pond now really ever since Egotastic! has been around. Nuts started as a print and then online lads magazine in the U.K. just about a decade ago. In that time, it’s hard to count on hands and toes and other appendages how many fine looking topless lasses they’ve brought to our attention. Now, they are closing shop. Online and off. It’s a melancholy moment for those 99.9% of us who love funbags.

It might not be common knowledge, but it’s very economically difficult to run an R-rated journalistic endeavor. You’re too racy for Victorian era corporate advertisers but you’re not racy enough for people willing to spend money for their passions. It’s the nightmare that keeps me awake at night, before I have some warm beer and ease back into slumber. We will miss Nuts. They were good, earnest, boobtastic loving folks. Of course, the glamour models will continue on in other venues, but as with any loss, things will not be entirely the same forever more.

Naturally, Nuts is going out with a chestal bang. A farewell edition full of ripe and ruddy British girls and their faptastic treats. Lucy Pinder, Stacey Poole, Rosie Jones and others taking part in one last lady hump hurrah. RIP.

Rosie Jones Topless Shall Always Be Three Words That Thrill Me Like No Other

 
Rosie Jones Topless Nuts Outtakes April 2014
Click to See Uncensored

I feel like I’ve been in lust with Rosie Jones since before my bobos even descended into their current location, though I’m certain that can’t possibly be true. Rosie Jones is still ever so young in her early 20′s but her several years now of showing off her fine female form without many clothes feels like she’s created a lifetime of memories already. Happy mammary memories.

But, like any great artist, there is no peaking for Rosie Jones. She’s back again in outtakes from her recent Nuts photoshoot and looking simpler hotter and more funbag faptastic than ever. I’m not exactly sure how she does it, I only know I wish I could bottle it and keep it by my bedside for occasional sniffs. Oh, the aroma of Rosie Jones sextastic could mean that I never sleep on my stomach again, Completely worth it. Bless you, Rosie Jones. Enjoy.

See More Rosie Jones Topless Goodness »

Rosie Jones Topless Dancing Jiggles Make Me Ever So Happy on a Mammarial Monday

 
Rosie Jones New Topless Nuts Screencaps
Click to See Uncensored

Hey, did you happen to see the most beautiful girl in the world, and if you did, was she crying? I mean, I like to think Rosie Jones and her inimitable funbags cries nightly knowing what she lost when she refused to answer my last 900 (rounded down) letters beseeching her to consider me as a viable suitor. Until such time as Rosie Jones comes to her senses and accepts me as her towel boy slash toe-butler, I will have to settle for the libido unsettling of her glorious female form in guises such as this sweet new looks at Rosie from her Nuts behind the scenes video.

Rosie Jones would qualify as a masterpiece if she sat in any museum, as a priceless keepsake were she judged in auction, and as my main squeeze were she in my stable of incredibly hot women dying to use me as a male object. Rosie Jones stirs so many emotions in my bubbly cauldron. I wish would you come hang out more often. Strip Connect Four is in our future. Enjoy.

See More Rosie Jones Topless Goodness »