Being short is in this week, what with The Hobbit making the Gross National Product of many smaller nations in cash over the weekend worldwide, so we decided to take up our own cause for the shorties, the vertically challenged girls of Hollywood we love and admire and occasionally tug our middle earth’s to, a sign of respect indeed.
The last time I went to Whole Foods, I dashed in for some Advil for a pounding headache and some dude in a scarf pointed me in the direction of sixteen kinds of herbal remedies before finally admitting that the place had no Advil. So I beat him severely about his midsection with a scrawny organic chicken I nabbed from the meat department.
Sometimes you just want what you want and there is no ‘healthier’ substitute. Take for instance our lust for all things Rachel Bilson, who happened to be out shopping at said Whole Foods market, flashing views of her bra and some legs in her shorter skirt, and making us realize that while the most delicious things in life are truly organic, we’d still like to cover them in unnatural passion by-product. Enjoy.
Rachel Bilson, Nina Dobrev, and AnnaSophia Robb Form a Trifecta of Hotness at CW Upfronts After Party
Now, I must admit to not having watched a single CW show, not at least since the day my family jewels descended into their velvet sack; none of them ever appealed to me. However, that does not deny the fact that the CW has put forth a bevy of beautiful young thespianics in their various craptastic melodramas, including the likes of Rachel Bilson, Nina Dobrev, and AnnaSophia Robb who paraded around the CW Upfront After Party last night and reminded me that menage-a-trois fantasies are just thinking small.
While all hotties who attend these Upfront meetings are restricted to family-friendly dress code, there was no denying the internal sextastic heat these three ladies can’t help but deliver whenever their shiny faces, and equally shiny bodies, make a public appearance. Could we someday learn that CW stands for Constant Wanking? Yes, yes we could. Enjoy.
If we were blessed yesterday to finally catch amazing glimpses of the sextastic Rachel Bilson in her Hawaiian bikini, let us feel doubly honored today for yet more leers at the eye-popping hottie on her romantic getaway to the islands, and our even more romantic ability to gawk at her hot petite body.
In a profile view today, we can fully appreciate the 360-degrees of Rachel Bilson hotness, including just a finely naturally hot booty and sweet dripping wet form coming out of the ocean like a mermaid whose cloacal sac we badly want to investigate. The only thing this vision of bikini beach perfection is missing is a Frisbee and a horny blogger with bad intentions. Enjoy.
How can you not feel like the stars are shining brightly upon gentleman oglers today?
‘Wow’ and ‘damn’ were the first two words I heard around these parts this morning when we first laid eyes upon our brunette object d’ lust, Rachel Bilson, in some very rare skintastic displays on the beach in Hawaii in a bikini that clung to her body as we imagine ourselves doing with her our hands and feet and teeth, as if a little monkey baby clinging to its swinging mother.
Rachel Bilson bikini pictures, oh happy days. It’s like Santa came 251 days early this year to drop some serious sextastic down our anatomical chimneys. I really must re-re-re-review these pictures one more time. Enjoy.