Nicole "Coco" Austin

Nicole ‘Coco’ Austin in See-Through Lingerie for Show Magazine

Massively endowed beauty Nicole ‘Coco’ Austin did a revealing spread for Show Magazine in see-through lingerie. She wore a backless neglige thing that was completely transparent and forgot to wear a bra underneath. This allows us a full view of her enormous funbags. These are Santa’s sack sized bags of fun, my friends. You get to see the scope of them in the rest of the photos in which a series of bras try, in vain, to contain those chi-chis with their puny fibers. Good luck. The pics also give us a bird’s eye view of Coco’s splendid booty. She’s pretty much the total package. I just want to lay my head between those lady pillows and drift off to dreamy dream land where I will see visions of bouncing love jugs in my head.

Buying this lingerie for your lady will inevitably a let down. I don’t know your girl, but I can almost guarantee she won’t look like Coco. Unless you date Coco in which case, congrats!

Coco Is Selling Sex Toys

If you’ve got it, flaunt it. And if you’re selling it, flaunt it just a bit harder. That might just be the motto of Coco as she lent nearly all of her boobtastic bounty to efforts to pimp her new line of signature sex products in Las Vegas. I’m not exactly sure why you would buy sex toys from her, but I guess you need to buy them from somebody if you want them, why not a woman who has curvaceous feminine spillage spilling out all over the place.

At some point, I’m going to introduce my own line of sex toys on the market as well. It’ll mostly resemble a can of beer, a TV remote, and a La-Z-boy recliner with a magazine rack attachment and stimulating back massager built in. If that doesn’t get you off, nothing else will. Men are simple. Enjoy.

Coco Austin and Diana Falzone Are Not Cleavage Shy for Heidi Klum’s Halloween Party

Well, Heidi Klum may have dressed up as a decrepit old lady for Halloween (um, why?), but most other sextastic celebrities realize that is their duty to flash their booty come the 31st of October. Including good friends of the Egotastic! family, Coco and Diana Falzone. Bosom buddies if you will, especially last night at Heidi’s shindig.

I suppose you could’ve called them Naughty and Naughtier, with the edge to Coco for wearing the schoolgirl costume for which my extreme affinity earns me many slings and arrows of judgement. I care not. I didn’t purchase a rule, a yardstick, and a paddle just to have them sitting gathering dust in my closet. Enjoy.

Coco’s Loco Oily Bottom, Nicki Minaj Handbra, and Nina Agdal Bikini Pics Highlight the Sextastic Twitpic Roundup

The first Sextastic Twitpic Roundup of summer was certain to be a doozy. Every hot girl in attention-town knows that when the warm weather is upon us, it’s time to step up the game as even the civilians are going to be running around in skimpy outfits. Lots of competition for the hearts and minds and eyeballs of men-kind. And step it up they do this week.

This week’s Roundup includes Coco baring several small European nation sized amounts of tanning skin, Nicki Minaj barely covered udders, Nina Agdal happy as a clam in various personal bikini pictures, Rita Ora getting vacation showy, Bar Refaeli flashing her day job bikini shot, Elizabeth Gillies underrated cleavetastic and so much more. You owe it to your favorite NFL star behind bars to check out each and every one of these amazingly hot selfies. Enjoy.

We Saw Coco in A Bikini; Now Let’s See Her Nekkid in Playboy

Click to See Uncensored

Yep, my favorite ever game. See a celebrity in their clothes, then see them without anything on. And with Coco, there’s a lot of flesh to expose. Hey, you may call me predictable, I like to think of myself as consistent.

Thanks to our friends at PlayboyPlus for this delectable delicious and otherwise DD version of the super curvaceous reality show blonde Ice-T missus. Coco has looked compelling before, but never so passion inducing as she did on the pages of Playboy.

And, as a must note, Playboy Plus and their 80% off monthly membership deal for Memorial Day continues, maybe til Flag Day, maybe sooner. Do not miss out if you want this deal-for-skin.

Coco Bikini Pictures for Asstastic Poolside Treats

When first you come upon the mighty curvaceous form of Coco in a tiny bikini, you might find yourself like a mountain climber before a mighty peak wondering just how to tackled the climb. This type of physical conquest requires planning, strategy, and lots of ropes and harnesses. I’m not long on strategy, but I do keep a lot of rope line in the trunk of my car. Don’t ask.

I also wonder how it is Coco finds bikinis that fit her, or don’t fit her, properly. I imagine you can’t just go off the rack to fit that rack. And that booty, well, there can’t be regular sized bottoms expected to even remotely modestly protect those twin caged tiger cheeks. These are the things I wonder. It’s my job. Yours is just to enjoy.

Coco Austin Flaunts Curves at Pet-A-Palooza in Las Vegas