Fitness expert and professional hot person Michelle Lewin was keeping your New Year’s resolution to get in better shape with a bikini workout in Miami. Michelle did a series of exercises all of which could have been mistaken for sexual positions. She is in redonkulously good shape. Michelle has got a stomach that you could use as a rhythm section for a bluegrass band and her thighs could crack walnuts. But she’s not so muscular that her boobies have turned to pecs, oh no. She’s got a righteous pair of funbags that look amazing in this pink bikini. But it is perhaps in the booty region that we can most behold how much all of that working out has paid off. She’s got a shapely butt that is as tight as a drum. Seriously, you could use those bad boys to play a salsa beat.
What I’m saying is that it isn’t enough to be hot, you’ve got to work to keep all of that stuff tight. Many a formerly hot person has gone the way of cellulite.
Photo Credit: Splash
I truly hope you’re enjoying your holiday today. To think that even half of the sugar plum fairies dancing in your head last night turned into sextastic real angels in thong bikinis today, that is the Christmas dream. In honor of the holiday, we put together a little melange of beach booty from Miami this past year, thong exposed asstastics from some of the regular bottom side contributors in South Florida in 2014. Claudia Romani, Michelle Lewin, Coco Austin, and others. Consider it my frankincense for your libidos.
Merry Christmas from Egotastic!
It’s not often I’m at a loss for words. In fact, ever since I became verbal at age six or so, I’ve been flapping my gums nonstop mostly about women, occasionally the international sport of skee-ball. But now, Michelle Lewin and her sextacular taut and tight and toned body out shopping in a half shirt and tight shorts. Wow, damn, silence.
If the pleasurable perusal of Michelle’s underboob doesn’t move you, then a peekaboo at her magically powerful thumper in those little shorts will likely do you in. Or maybe it’s a stroll along her worked out midriff that does it for you. Her outstandingly inspiring female form is like a map of extreme adventure. Did I mention damn already? I hate to curse, I can still feel the ringing in my ears from a cuff to the head by Sister Mary Alice, but Michelle Lewin makes me feel that much closer to he who endowed me with the spirit of mating. I need a chew towel. This is getting out of control. Michelle Lewin, you need to be registered as a lethal weapon. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Splash
If hot bodies could open doors, and they do in my abode, then Michelle Lewin could pretty much walk through any portal in the world just by flashing her thong laced asstastic. Damn that thumper on this fitness model and all-around Miami area body exhibitionist deserves some kind of medal. I’d pin it on her just to watch her crush it betwixt her powerful cheeks and form it into a perfectly smooth diamond.
Michelle avoided the beach crowd and took her bikini sextastic show to the local area pool where she set sail on her raft which just has to be called the S.S. Boner Inducer and put on a show for gentleman oglers within a forty block radius. It’s simply incredibly how tight and taught she keeps her curves. You throw in those 1980′s reflective sunglasses and you have the makings of a visual wonderment. Please, proceed with caution. Don’t chafe to badly before Christmas, especially if you work the mall santa swing shift. The children need you. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Splash News
You know my disdain for superlatives, but this might just be the best thong ever invented. It’s kind of there, it’s kind of not there, it’s kind of being consumed into the asstastic of Michelle Lewin in a manner I’ve dreamed of happening to my entire self many a night. Wow. It’s like the string around the finest Christmas gift package ever. Okay, so some superlatives.
Michelle Lewin didn’t even make it as far as the beach today. Just the pool where I imagine trying to be an un-obvious ogler among the gentlemen set was nearly impossible as Michelle posed and preened in her tiny top and dental floss thin bottom, baring that hard worked body of hers. I’d be moving my sombrero off my head so as not to frighten the children nearby. Michelle Lewin, that thong and thumper of yours ought to be illegal. And I’d like to be the cop who arrests you for it. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Splash News
I really just see my own words coming to fruition here by the minute. Is the competition heating up already in Miami for best bikini body? Oh, yes, it’s already en fuego. Michelle Lewin is staking out her territory of the worked out, yoked out, curvaceous asstastic model types. The competition is rough, but Michelle looks more than ready for anything that might come her way, including the glances of gentlemen oglers peeking her readily abundant taut female form.
What’s clear to me is that this is going to be the best winter yet in Miami. It’s all been leading up to this. Like the perfect storm of the bikini sextastic. Also, I realize I’m going to need new binoculars and an enhanced brush and local flora disguise to blend in to the background as these luscious legs, ample thumpers, and precious pert ta-ta’s walk endlessly by. So much to do, so little time. The work doesn’t scare me, just the humiliating public boners. Nature made me this way! Enjoy.
The competition for best butt on Miami Beach is a rigorous, if not nearly deadly battle for thumper supremacy. So many fine women in so many tiny bikinis vying for the informal title of Miami Asstastic. The amount of hours and sweat and determination and blessed genes that goes into even being near the top, well, it’s unimaginable nearly. I say nearly because I imagine it so very often myself.
Michelle Lewin must be considered in and around the Heisman Trophy finalist category in the department of the killer tush in thong. Her bottom side, her all over sides, well, they just exude a passion inducement that is nearly impossible to resist. When she preens and poses and stretches her fitness yoked body on the beach, at least a dozen gentleman oglers require CPR immediately on the spot. Now that is power. Enjoy.