Well hello there, social media landscape filled with the visual wonderments published by the audience loving sextastic celebrities themselves. My how you’ve grown, in just the past few weeks and months. More skin, more photos, more delicious selfies and candids of the women who make a good chunk of their living by being super hot. There’s nothing wrong with that, especially when they love to share.
This week’s Sextastic Twitpic Roundup features Kim Kardashian flashing cleavage in her new fur bikini, Emily Ratajkowski not wearing any clothes in a tiny outdoor tub, Adrianne Curry flexing her bare backside for the selfie, Kelly Brook chesty workouts, Anna Kournikova in a return to bikini candids, Selena Gomez boudoir posing, and much much more. You own it to your deflated balls to psi each and every one of these truly hot social media shares into your libido. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Twitter/Instagram/Facebook
Our brief and completely non-scientific review of 2014 would not be complete without a visual mention of the continued growth of the sextastic celebrity self-published social media pics. Whatever you thought hacking or public relations warnings or desires to be taken super seriously were going to do to quell the rising tide of hot selfies and candids posted to Twitter and Instagram, well, they had zero impact. 2014 saw the continued boom of sweet celebrities showing more and more skin more and more often. Who says prayers aren’t answered directly.
Take a stroll down hot candid mammary lane once more with a look at a few dozen of my favorite self-posted celebrity photos of 2014. I can’t wait to see what 2015 holds and unholds in this regard. Enjoy.
Oh, Emily Ratajkowski, first you won my heart, now my body. Please show up to accept your award. I’ll be the knee-buckled jellyfish like creature in the corner waiting for you to take me home and put me over your fireplace. I hope you have one in the bedroom.
Emily looked absolutely perfect as any woman can be in clothing at the Women in Entertainment breakfast, an event that doesn’t sound like I should be attending, but one for which I should mostly definitely be spying from the rafters. Talk about your procession of hotties pretending to eat French Toast but just nibbling on a single egg white omelet and a grape. Yum. Starvation and sextastic decked out ladies make me quiver. Emily, if you look this smoking hot in the morning, I can only imagine how alluring you will look after seventeen hours of nonstop making of the sexy in the rumpus room at my abode. I just need to find somebody to cover me on the latter sixteen hours and forty minutes. Daddy needs his naps. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Getty Images / Splash News
Boobtastic duo Emily Ratajkowski and Nina Agdal were looking fine as F at the 5th Annual Bombay Sapphire Artisan Series finale. Emily was wearing a form fitting dress that showed off those famous curves. I remember when I first saw Emily’s funbags in the uncensored version of Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines. I was instantly in love with those ta-tas. If it had been a cartoon little hearts would have appeared above my head. Not to be outdone, Nina wore a SHORT skit and crop top. She’s got some pretty outstanding legs. They are long and lean and make me wish they were wrapped around me. The crop top also showed off her tight bare mid-riff which is always a good thing.
I’ve got to start getting invites to these events where hot people converge. It is a scientific fact that where you find one sexy person you will most likely find another and another. It’s the physics of hottness.
Photo Credit: Getty Images
Christmas Lingerie. Santa, you’ll note that’s the first 45 requests in my lengthy list of asks this Yuletide. Specifically, pay attention please to line item 1 where I ask that Emily Ratajkowski in that lingerie be part of a package request. You give me a lump of coal agains this year St. Nick and I will eat one of your reindeer. That’s not a threat, that’s a promise with a recipe for braised Donder attached.
Emily Ratajkowski working her fine self into little bits of lingerie, as she does for this Yamamay holiday sextastic shoot, well, it’s just a thing of art. The star on the top of my rigid Norwegian spruce, if you speak bad arboreal puns and know what I’m saying. One year for Christmas, I literally got a kick in the ass from dad for the holiday. Santa, I’m not begging, but I am pleading, Emily in a babydoll beneath my lifelike Xmas tree in 2014. You have no idea how big a smile I will make. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Yamamay Lingerie
Emily Ratajkowski is showing up to more and more places in clothes. It’s kind of a mixed bag. While I always dream of her extensive unclad work, it’s always a blessing to see a super sextastic young woman in her cleavy finest at events such as this Hollywood Foreign Press bit of nonsense two months still ahead of the Golden Globe Awards. The awards season in Hollywood is pretty much a year round thing now, which I would complain more about save for the likes of Emily Ratajkowski looking like the dream girl I had hoped to take to the prom (no offense to Andrea and her back brace naturally, we had good times).
My verdict is in. I will allow Emily to be seen in clothing, at times, provided she obtain my prior written consent and I can still see enough skin to receive a material levels of tingles. This current leg and chest show meets the standard. I approve! Enjoy.
You’ve got me. I have no clue what the Hollywood Film Awards are. Apparently, this is the 18th annual version of the event and I’m still kind of dumbfounded. That’s not an unusual state of mind in my regard, and you know I believe we simply can’t have enough award shows honoring the benevolent and heroic daily lives of our Hollywood celebrities, such an under-recognized bunch they are. Still, can’t say I’ve ever heard of this one. Though it certainly did bring out the big names in A-list talent along with a bevy of decked out sextastic Tinsel Town lovelies including Kristen Stewart, Emily Ratajkowski, Felicity Jones, Jing Tian, Lia Marie Johnson, Jenna Dewan Tatum and many more.
As always, I fall back on the guiding rule that any event with attractive women is a worthwhile event. Like most of the award shows that will start with award season in January, the upside is the gaggle of glorious hotties who’ve spent hours looking their best. As they always do. So pass out your shiny trophies and auto-fellate yourself into the seventh level of Nirvana, Hollywood. Just keep on bringing out the smoking hot women in showy gowns and we’re all good.