Chrissy Teigen

Chrissy Teigen Loves to Show Off Her Funbags, We Love to Oblige

It’s called symbiosis. Chrissy Teigen loves to bare her braless sweater puppies as much as decently if not legally possible during her Manhattan jaunts. We love to leer endlessly and pretend we’ll be cupping those sweet teats later in an adulterous bubble bath at the Plaza. That might be a pretend specific to my own thoughts, you create your own.

Chrissy found a sideboob cleavy revealing top for a simple promenade in the Big Apple that allowed us to righteously declare once more, sextastic girl with one fine fun parts. The Eurasian alluring model has always tugged at our lower heart strings. Now that she’s been in the public eye more thanks to her high profile marriage and SI cover, we get to delight in Chrissy’s passion inducing skills that much more. She seems very much up to the task. Now, it’s time for us to do our part. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Is White Hot In NYC

Chrissy Teigen was looking hot as F in a short white dress in New York City. Chrissy, who is a professional hot person, was sporting a dress that had slits in the back so you could see her lovely back skin. I do enjoy a woman’s back. It’s an oft ignored part of the woman’s anatomy. Let me let you in on a little love tip from your buddy Jack, the ladies like it when you kiss their backs. Don’t go straight for the boobies or the swimsuit area. Trust me, you’ll get birthday favors on a Tuesday, if you get my meaning. Chrissy also has seriously sexy legs. They are long and lean and perfectly shaped. The dress was tight so you also got a nice view of Chrissy’s lovely booty shape. I am also a fan of a nice round butt like she’s got.

All good stuff all around. Sometimes it’s what you don’t see that’s sexy. Other times I just want a girl in a bikini. Depends on the mood.

Chrissy Teigen Cleavetastic Swimsuit Madness for Esquire

Chrissy Teigen kind of owns the world at the moment. SI covers, music artist husband, drunk ball tossing at Dodgers games. And, now this. One wicked hot spread for Esquire magazine that features our belusted Eurasian model in all kinds of glowing boobtastic and alluring outdoor swimsuit poses.

I’m not sure if Chrissy’s funbags are getting bigger or that’s just a trick of the camera or wardrobe or my ever imagining mind, but they certainly have a hold of me like a seal being taken down by a Great White. I can even feel her teeth. Chrissy, you are peaking at just the right time. That time is now. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Flashing Her Summer Peaches in The Big Apple

Chrissy Teigen is not a particularly shy girl. She speaks her mind. And wears her mind, or doesn’t mind wearing very little, even for public promenades down the streets of New York wherein her faptastic funbags nearly fell out of her braless top for just such a stroll.

Chrissy’s profile has definitely been raised yet again this year with all her SI notoriety, celebrity marriage, and just a whole bunch of outstandingly sextastic photoshoots and appearance. And let’s not forget just an open top with no bra for a summer’s amble. Chrissy knows how to promote. We know how to ogle. This makes for a naturally synergistic relationship. Boobs! Enjoy.

Jessica Alba and Chrissy Teigen’s Funbags Highlighted the Hotness at the 2014 ESPY Awards

When ESPN announced that Drake would be hosting the 2014 ESPY awards, I kind of felt that pang in my stomach like, oh, know, I’m off-demo for the ESPYs. Not that I’m not a monster Drake fan, his face above my bed next to Justin and the boys from One Direction. Still, I felt old. Thankfully, the hotties on the red carpet came quickly along and made me feel young in the soul and nether regions again.

The lineup of sextastic celebrities at the ESPY’s wavers from year to year, but there’s always some significant highlights. Like this year, Jessica Alba, the uber-sextastic MILF who can do no wrong, and Chrissy Teigen, whose new pea-henning of her burgeoning ta-ta’s has been a true delight these past few months. The duo weren’t they only lovely ladies in attendance, but after they did arrive, I had to hit the cold shower for 97 minutes to get back into caring about sports mode. The ESPY’s have flailed a bit, but there’s nothing a solid dose of the sextastic can’t make you forget about. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Topless Black and White and Hot All Over (Yeah, Must See!)

Chrissy Teigen Topless Black and White 'All of Me' Shoot by Sasha Samsonova
Click to See Uncensored

I’ve been in lust ever since I first laid eyes upon Eurasian beauty Chrissy Teigen. I like to think that her ignoring my letters and calls and airplane banners with pictures of my shorn scrote are a pretty solid signs that she feels the same about me. From her early modeling days to her rise in fashion and swimsuit and Sports Illustrated modeling and marrying fancypants singers and having a glass of wine or four and engaging on Twitter. It’s always been pure lust.

But, now, thanks to a ton of you who are ever so eagle-eyed and generous to share your discovery, here’s a wicked hot pictorial of Chrissy Teigen topless in a shoot by Sasha Samsonnova. It’s black and white which means it must be respected as art, but it’s Chrissy Teigen without her clothes on which means it should be respected with the door locked in the privacy of your bathroom or happy time corner of this world.

Everyday is a good day to be a lusty man or Sapphic leaning desirous woman. Today is a great day. Enjoy.

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Chrissy Teigen In A Bikini Top And Cutt Offs At The Beach In Miami