Chrissy Teigen

Jessica Alba and Chrissy Teigen’s Funbags Highlighted the Hotness at the 2014 ESPY Awards

When ESPN announced that Drake would be hosting the 2014 ESPY awards, I kind of felt that pang in my stomach like, oh, know, I'm off-demo for the ESPYs. Not that I'm not a monster Drake fan, his face above my bed next to Justin and the boys from One Direction. Still, I felt old. Thankfully, the hotties on the red carpet came quickly along and made me feel young in the soul and nether regions again.

The lineup of sextastic celebrities at the ESPY's wavers from year to year, but there's always some significant highlights. Like this year, Jessica Alba, the uber-sextastic MILF who can do no wrong, and Chrissy Teigen, whose new pea-henning of her burgeoning ta-ta's has been a true delight these past few months. The duo weren't they only lovely ladies in attendance, but after they did arrive, I had to hit the cold shower for 97 minutes to get back into caring about sports mode. The ESPY's have flailed a bit, but there's nothing a solid dose of the sextastic can't make you forget about. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Topless Black and White and Hot All Over (Yeah, Must See!)

 

I've been in lust ever since I first laid eyes upon Eurasian beauty Chrissy Teigen. I like to think that her ignoring my letters and calls and airplane banners with pictures of my shorn scrote are a pretty solid signs that she feels the same about me. From her early modeling days to her rise in fashion and swimsuit and Sports Illustrated modeling and marrying fancypants singers and having a glass of wine or four and engaging on Twitter. It's always been pure lust.

But, now, thanks to a ton of you who are ever so eagle-eyed and generous to share your discovery, here's a wicked hot pictorial of Chrissy Teigen topless in a shoot by Sasha Samsonnova. It's black and white which means it must be respected as art, but it's Chrissy Teigen without her clothes on which means it should be respected with the door locked in the privacy of your bathroom or happy time corner of this world.

Everyday is a good day to be a lusty man or Sapphic leaning desirous woman. Today is a great day. Enjoy.

Congratulations to Nina Agdal, Lily Aldridge, and Chrissy Teigen for Headlining the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition

You know we predicted Nina Agdal and her meteoric rise the minute she stepped foot out of Denmark, so we couldn't be more pleased two years later to see her covering the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition. Along with wicked hot Lily Aldridge and one of our long time favorite model hotties, Chrissy Teigen.

There will always be some controversy as to these decisions naturally, but I'd say SI did a nice job in picking a photo of three ridiculously hot women without their tops on, not to mention bottoms to die for. You could do worse, it's hard to imagine much better.

Congratulations to Nina, Lily, and Chrissy. There's no denying this is the big time. Enjoy.

56th Grammy Awards Red Carpet Hotties Rolling In

The theme so far on the red carpet at the 56th Grammy Awards seems to be glamor. Read that as not a heck of a lot of skin. Which is rather odd given the amount of skin used to promote and sell modern music. But I suppose everybody is allowed to pretend.

Stay tuned throughout the pre-show to this ever growing gallery of arrivals on the red carpet at the Grammy Awards, including Taylor SwiftParis Hilton, Katy Perry, Anna Kendrick, Ariana Grande, Miranda Lambert, and more. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen So Happy Her Boob Nearly Falls Out of Her Top

Still riding high, if not a bit sore, from her recent marriage and honeymoon, Chrissy Teigen can't wipe the smile off her face. She's so damn happy her festive model funbags are swelling with pride. Almost swelling right out with her nipples demanding a little sunshine in The Big Apple.

We couldn't be happier for Chrissy, that grin of hers alone let's you know she's getting the Legend on a very regular basis. But if she could be perhaps a bit more absent minded next time and let it all hang out, we'd all appreciate it. Simple request. Then I'll send the wedding gift. Boob for a blender. Let's do this. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Topless on Set of John Legend Music Video

 

John Legend's song is called All of Me, and while his future wife Chrissy Teigen didn't exactly show all of herself, she showed off her bare boob in a picture that eventually made it's way onto Tumblr and then to the Instagram account of the photographer.

Chrissy didn't seem to mind so much as she retweeted the photo itself, proving once again that Chrissy Teigen is pretty damn cool, that John Legend is a very lucky man, and that topless pictures of women are one hundred times more interesting than anything else posted on social media networks ever. Enjoy.

Chrissy Teigen Sextastic Red Swimsuit Beneath a Waterfall of Skittles

As an advocate of legalized marijuana, I am naturally also a strong proponent of Skittles. There's really no way to separate the two. Hot eurasian model Chrissy Teigen apparently likes them too. Or being paid by them, as she endured a waterfall barrage of Skittles in a commercial shoot for the candy company whilst, more importantly to us, wearing one of her signature low cut swimsuits and showing off her wicked body.

While I could make a crude joke about showering Chrissy is a more organic type of candy, I know there are many impressionable youths reading this site, and God forbid any of them should ever grow up thinking sex is fun, so I'll stick to the fact that after all that sugar flying about, Chrissy is going to need a proper brushing and a a rinse. And I just happen to have a brush handy. Enjoy.