If you know Brandi Glanville, then you know an evening out is going to start out with Brandi looking rather fetching for a 40-something mom, and end with Brandi jelly-kneed and needing assistance to a car service to take her home. She does seem to like herself a cocktail or two. But, heck, it was her birthday, and despite being in hot water over recent unflattering comments about Joanna Krupa’s lady nest, Brandi decided to let loose. Ironically, she also brought along her Sobriety House friend and former model, Jennifer Gimenez to double up on the hotness for the evening, before the shots I suppose started rolling in steadily.
I’ll say this for Brandi, before her legs go wobbly from the spirits, they are a rather fine pair of stems, beneath an ever-chosen short dress for the evening out, a regular source of flashing happy opportunities. Enjoy.
It’s not easy being the ex-wife of the dude who dumped you for LeAnn Rimes I suppose. The pressure has sent Brandi Glanville into a few public drunken tailspins, but make no mistake about it, when she cleans up and works out and sticks to water, Brandi is still clearly one of the better looking supposedly real Housewives.
We caught Brandi doing some rather public yoga in the park in Beverly Hills. I suppose she wasn’t exactly trying to hide her female form, showing off her sweaty work dedicated to showing everybody she’s nobody’s second choice. I’m starting to feel that way ogling her at this very moment. First choice, for now. Enjoy.
Much of Tinsel Town showed up for the Bruno Mars concert over the weekend, because, well, because somebody in public relations told them to go and be seen. Plus, you do get free tickets and booze. And nobody loves booze, and a chance to show off some mama skin more these days than Brandi Glanville. So she showed up baring some serious bosom and ready to rock and roll.
I’ll say this, Brandi Glanville knows how to get noticed. And I’m a guy who likes to notice things. Enjoy.
To be fair, I have no idea if Brandi Glanville is drunk or not. I can say with some certainty that she did get out of her cab last night outside the London Hotel unable to walk or keep her barely there dress covering up her thong and butt cheeks. You might take that as a sign. Generally, when I find myself walking around in just my underwear late night outside hotels, I’ve had a few too many too drink. Either that or I’m late on the rent money, but I prefer not to talk about what daddy has to do to pay the bills.
Brandi Glanville has been quite busy with public scenes and meltdowns of late, including her recent no-underwear date night flashing. I suppose this is something of a step up. I’m not sure she’s exactly making her children proud. At the same time, as long as she’s flashing, it’s not like I’m not looking. An opportunity wasted really is a sin. Enjoy.
My Uncle Soss who lived with us for a couple years used to tell me to make sure I was wearing clean underwear before I left the house as a kid. He always told me, ‘Never know when you’re going to get hit by a bus.’ Which scared me something awful. Not just because of the bloody imagery, but also because Uncle Soss was a city bus driver.
I can tell you who didn’t heed that advice. Brandi Glanville. The Eskimo sister to LeAnn Rimes and current Beverly Hills Housewife pulled a classic commando mistake, thinking she’d get away without underwear with a short dress and a car seat to maneuver onto. Nuh-uh. Brandi Glanville flashed her bare lady nest for the entire world to see. Well, at least the entire Egotastic! world to see, but I’m guessing some of you might share our little secret.
Beverly Hills Housewife? Try Desperate Housewife, because… oh, never mind. Just look at her bare cooch. Enjoy.
Ah, finally, the 2013 Academy Awards, a.k.a., The Oscars, are finally upon us. The ceremonial end to the six week long bout of Hollywood auto-fellatio that encompasses about 30-40 events of celebrities patting celebrities on the back for being such wonderful citizens of the world. But, make no mistake about it, this is the big one, mostly because every single hot woman in Hollywood will either be at The Oscars today or attending one of the many swank after-parties. This is the single biggest day of the year in Tinsel Town.
Now, then, on to the sextastic on the Oscar Red Carpet….
We’ll be updating this post through the evening, but so far, we’ve got MILFtastic Reese Witherspoon leading our list of ‘damn!’ on the Red Carpet, Brandi Glanville deserving the Attention Getter award for being a reality show housewife who somehow got an Oscar invite and made the boobtastic most of it, and Maria Menounous for simply being ridiculously hot everywhere she goes…
(This gallery will update further as more arrivals, well, arrive)
I think Bravo TV has finally got the info back from the stats department that their .00001% straight male audience figures for their omnipresent Real Housewives series might be related to their cast of old biddy plastic surgeried drunken middle aged troubled housewives. Yeah, dudes don’t really go for that, even if they’re married to them. That’s why we have Egotastic!, err, umm.
But, Bravo is definitely taking a new strategy of late by adding younger, hotter-bodied housewives to their mentally and emotionally effed up corral, including Joana Krupa on the Miami-series and Brandi Glanville, the chick that LeAnn Rimes paid some ungodly some of money to hand over her husband because she wuvved him so much. Well, while LeAnn slowly goes bonkers from lack of food, Brandi Glanville got invited to be the younger, hotter, slightly less Botoxed housewife on the Beverly Hills-series. And if you take a look at her bikini pictures from over the weekend, you might see how and why Bravo is expecting to grab new straight dude viewers to their show.
I think there’s still a long way to go before that, but this is definitely a step in the sextastic direction. Enjoy.