The Sextastic Celebs At The Illuminate Festival At The P Nightclub In LA

I do not have any interest in going to a club called P. One does not have to be a cryptologist to crack the code of what goes on there, and it rhymes with sholden gowers. I never understood the draw of that kind of activity. Maybe I am just too lazy for it, because it does seem like there would be a lot of prep beforehand as well as clean up after. I mean, I am still hoping to get the security deposit back for my apartment at the end of my lease. I do not need my sexual depravity to ruin one more thing in my life.

These women seem awfully dressed up to be enjoying wet activities, so maybe I am wrong about the whole thing. I sure as hell would not wear designer clothing to a peefest. I’d be there in a full body poncho like I was attending a Gallagher show. But who knows, maybe ruining good clothing is part of the thrill. I am not trying to get inside the minds of these people to figure out what gets there jimmy’s off. I am just a simple man who enjoys urinating in a urinal.

Photo Credit: Splash News