Ela Rose Topless Bikini Pimping The Bottled Water and Malibu Shores

 

Now the faux bottled water company has gone and done it. Straight up bare boobtastic from Swedish model Ela Rose in the pimping pursuit of merching the H20. How unseemly. And, yes, always pretty darn awesome. I'm still not buying any water, but I am going to consider the affects of water on the bikini bottom clad Ela as she promenades across the Southern California shoreline with her especially perfect funbags moist in the chilly autumn breeze. You know when I use the word 'autumn' I'm kind of in lust.

I'm not exactly sure where this bottled water campaign is headed business wise. I only know it has taken a turn for the better in the visual wonderments departments. Perhaps they should sell photos instead of.... hey, wait a minute. Enjoy.

Fergie Looked Good, Damn Leggy Good at the AMA’s

I'd be remiss if I didn't give a special shoutout to Fergie and her rejuvenated gams of goodness performing at the 2041 American Music Awards. Let's be honest, Fergie had been looking a little less than prime during her post baby time and end of world tours and whatever else was going on for much of last year. But consider the AMA's her coming out, err, coming back party. Damn, she looked so good. Especially those long toned legs of her she showed off in many flexing positions singing whatever song I wasn't listening to.

It's easy to criticize somebody's looks, but it's far more fun and profitable to revel in their sextastic. Fergie is not only back, this may be the best I ever remember her looking. She's sizzling. Oh to have those long legs wrapped around... never mind. I was going with a Nutcracker scenario probably not appropriate for our grade school readers. Thanks for the links, Highlights. Keep up the leggy fine work, Fergie. Enjoy.

Reese Witherspoon Jogs Her Little Heart Out (and Her Butt and Boobastic Off)

Ah, blessed stretch pants mixed with the sweaty determination of my belusted Reese Witherspoon, back to her daily jogging routine in Brentwood. You could easily lose Reese in the crowd of joggers who traffic those streets and pathways in the morning, that is unless you had a monster crush on Reese and your johnson served as a GSP toward her visual treats.

Reese working out hard in form fitting clothes has come to be one of my morning workout routine fixtures. I've worked up some pretty decent pythons tilting those mini-binoculars and camera phone. It's not the weight, it's the reps. Reese, might I recommend you quit that routine of the giant circle and instead shift gears in a beeline to my heart. It's just a suggestion. Enjoy.

Daisy Lowe Topless Moments Amid Artistic Style in Hunger Mag

 

As far as Gavin Rossdale's love children go, Daisy Lowe still remains at the top of my list for getting stuck in an elevator with. Just one fine brunette model from the Old Country who makes for ever faptastic photoshoots, even when designed almost entirely for the fashion and style conscious women's magazine crowd. I care not. There is no mountain high enough or valley low enough that I won't search for the sextastic. You know, provided there's an In&Out burger that serves alcohol when I get there.

Featured in the current Hunger magazine, Daisy Lowe gives up a little something something of topless peeks to the casual gentleman ogler who might happen upon her spread after his lady is done oohing and aahing over the marvelous photos. I don't know which planet men are from, but it's the one where we really like to see ridiculously hot women without their tops on. I'm not sure it's named after a Roman god. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez Chesty Goodness in Multiple Outfits at the 2014 American Music Awards

I would be remiss if I didn't close out the coverage of the limply limp 2014 American Music Awards with my personal highlight of Selena Gomez flashing chesty goodness in multiple wardrobe changes for the red carpet, show performance, and just hanging with her hottie besties in the front row of the audience. Selena has definitely grown into her pop diva role and the various revealing and form fitting outfits that come with such a job responsibility. And, my oh my, did she look stellar.

I can't say Selena and her nearly bared niblets were enough to make watching those AMA's horrific, let alone her sing clearly intended for the Devil's Midget, but it certainly helped. Te amo, Selena. One day we'll match that minxy body of yours to the appropriate Justin-free mindset and we'll really have a home run. Until then, a solid triple with your luscious doubles. Enjoy.

Martha Hunt Topless And Other fine Things To Ogle

Martha Hunt shows off her thingies in Marie Claire Italy. (Drunken Stepfather)

It's OK to drool over Lourdes Leon. She's 18. (TMZ)

Iggy Azalea and Jennifer Lopez AMA performance of "Booty" was Bootyriffic. (Huffington Post)

Emily Ratajkowski has got some righteous cleavage. Righteous. (Hollywood Tuna)

Lana Del Ray steams up the latest Maxim cover. (Popoholic)

Lindsay Lohan in a see-through shirt is hot again, yeah! (The Superficial)

Natalie Dormer covered topless. That is all. (Dlisted)

Adriana Lima, Raquel Zimmermann, Isabeli Fontana Topless Wall Perfect for Pirelli 2015

 

The Pirelli Calendar is officially back. As in, it's been publishing every single year now for decades, but there have been times it decided that hot topless supermodels were somehow passé and it needed to up it's artistic and hyper-stylized cred. Why? Nobody knows. I'm just glad that short lived era is over. There's nothing like art to ruin a perfectly blessed pair of funbags.

The Pirelli Calendar 2015 features a bevy of hot European models, one for each month, flashing their bare puppies and all over hot bodies for the love of keeping track of days. Adriana Lima, Raquel Zimmermann and Isabeli Fontana are among the world class models baring their yams for the Pirelli auto parts folks. They all joined up in Milan recently to celebrate. I wasn't invited to that shindig for some reason, but that doesn't take away my enthusiasm in turning the pages of my ill-gotten Pirelli calendar here in the Egotastic penthouse basement offices. Onward and ta-ta upward in 2015. Enjoy.