Kelly Brook’s Sexy Calendar And Other Fine Things To Ogle

Kelly Brook's Calendar is 365 days of fap. (Celebslam)

Jennifer Lawrence looks leggy in a short black dress. (TMZ)

Lindsay Lohan is looking kinda hot in this covered topless Instagram pic. (Drunken Stepfather)

Katie Price is boobtacular at her new book launch. (Hollywood Tuna)

Stella Maxwell in a bikini is the reason to go on living. (Popoholic)

Kim Kardashian wears a see-through dress because that's what she does. (The Superficial)

Ireland Baldwin is 19 and here are some hot shots of her being hot. (COED)

Nicole Neal Dareth To Drop Top Against Lucy Collett in the Battle of the Boobtastic

 

There are two things you never want to stand in the way of. An out of control septic tank flushing truck and two hot ladies with stellar chesty treats determined to round off in the Battle of the Boobtastic. Though, really, if you had to choose only one, I'd choose getting in the mix of the boob battle.

This weeks two who dared to bare for the glory of Rome and Gentleman Oglers are Nicole Neal, a blonde hottie of extraordinary hot bodily talents and Lucy Collett, the ginger topped curvaceous dreamboat of my nightly REM sleep fantasies. I'd like both girls leave cracker crumbs in my bed. Hot sweet sextastic crumbs. But only one can strut away today wearing the virtual crown of champions. It's up to you to make the Solomonesque decision, between these two perfect gals, whose ta-ta's reign supreme?

Battle of the Boobtastic: Nicole Neal vs. Lucy Collett

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Nicole Scherzinger, Jessie J, and Tulisa Contostavlos Highlight the Braless Hotness at the Mobo Awards

I'm not exactly sure what the British Mobo Awarda are for. There are simply too many award shows these days to keep track of them all. There must be fifty between the U.S. and the U.K. and my head is already filled with Flinstones trivia. I have no more space. Suffice it to say, this awards show seemed to encourage its hottie attendees to go braless, so I fully support whatever they were rewarding last evening.

Some of Britain's finest music industry makers such as Nicole Scherzinger, Jessie J, and Tulisa Contostavlos showed up the event decked out and looking to show off the hours of hard work in yoga by way of slinky sultry skin tight dresses without much need for undergarment support. I'd like an award show just for sextastic celebrities dressing commando. I know precisely where I'd like to pin the medals. Congratulations to all the winners of awards at this show for who knows what. And congratulations to use gentleman oglers who now get to see the very best bits. Enjoy.

Clara Alonso Sweet Sultry Boudoir Shoot for Lipsy

If you happen to dig on sultry hot Spanish models in bedroom wear and not much else, you will buy heavily into sextastic chica Clara Alonso pimping out the product for Lipsy in London via supremely hot body and alluring looks. The former Victoria's Secret runway model has got the goods up and down her fine female form to be promoting anything from insurance to bulk cod, but I'm certainly glad she chose little bits of lingerie and boudoir fashions for hanging around the flat after we've just made the sweet sexy for up to eleven minutes.

Clara Alonso and her fellow Spanish en fuego models remind me why Spain has always been such an integral part of warring tribes historical takeover plans. It's the women. It's always been the women. Disfruta.

Sara Sampaio Topless Sultry Dreams Comes True in Black and White

 

Sara Sampaio just happens to be the hottest thing to come out of Portugal since spice shellfish stew and only one of those do I want to cuddle up with in my Ikea bed after dark. Hint, not the stew. We've been yearning, longing, and outright fawning over Sara Sampaio since first we laid peeps upon the wicked hot sultry brunette. Now, she just got a little bit sultrier, by way of these topless crazy alluring shots in Russell James Angels book, which if you're not in line to buy, then what the heck do you spend your money on?

Sara is one of those girls that reminds me that just when you thought a sextastic model couldn't get any hotter, well, there's always a notch higher. There's always an 11 to climb to when the moment is just right. Sara Sampaio and that outstanding female form creates many right moments. I'd lay down the plastic sheeting in advance, just in case that moment strikes without warning. Enjoy.

Jennifer Lopez Puts The Hot Concert Booty Into Canada’s We Day

We Day in Canada is described a a day for youth empowerment. I'm not so sure that's even such a good idea. I was once a youth and the last thing I needed was power. Sure, I wanted it, but looking back on it, had I not been a disenfranchised struggling powerless teen, I might have actually been dangerous. Nevertheless, if you're looking to feel youth empowered, you could do worse than checking out Jennifer Lopez and her crazy hot MILF booty on stage in Vancouver for a We Day concert. I don't know, I feel ten years younger already just seeing that perfected Latina flesh twisting and turning so effortlessly on stage. How many 40-something moms do you know who perform full squats in front of strangers? Names and phone numbers please.

Jennifer Lopez isn't getting old, she's just getting more savvy. Not many artists understand the true source of their popularity and are able to keep playing to it year after year to bring in ever renewed audiences and fans. Jennifer knows exactly the source of her income. She sits on it daily. Oh, that thumper. Enjoy.

Arianny Celeste Bikinis, Courtney Stodden Barely Legals, Kelly Brook Bikinis Highlight the Sextastic Twitpic Roundup

Holy hot social media views, Batman. This week is beyond a bevy of the loveliest among us, well, the most sextastic among us at least, sharing photos of themselves online because they are quite certain the rest of us need our fix. And, we do. So this works out super well. What's sort of surprising is that the girls who were caught up in the hacker funbag scandal continue to post racy photos of themselves, almost as if the intense trauma of millions of men knowing you look absolutely crazy hot nekkid has passed, at least a little.

This week's Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes Kelly Brook candidly hot in a bikini, Courtney Stodden barely covering her bare body and jugs, Aly Michalka natural bikini hotness, Crystal Hefner showing off her fine female form, both Kaili Thorne and Dani Thorne holding their own ta's on Instagram, Sarah Hyland swimsuit cleavetastic, Coco big booty asstastic, Emily Ratajkowski covering her own pears, Adrianne Curry turned around nekkid, and much much more. You owe it to hot female school teachers thinking about after school lessons with their teen students to check out each and every one of these ridiculously wicked social media shares. Enjoy.