Natalie Portman Hotness Drives Me a Little Bit Bonkers

Is there something wrong with a man desperately waiting for his copy of Marie Claire magazine to hit the front stoop? What if that man has a monster lust crush on Hebrew School hottie extraordinaire, Natalie Portman. Albeit, these pictures are a little tame, even with the recognition that the petite Portman is wearing no bra beneath what I'm sure is some outrageously overpriced frock. Still, Natalie Portman-anything excites me. Natalie Portman Ikea furniture instructions. Mmm. Natalie Portman dry erase markers. Can't wait to get my hands on them! Natalie Portman becomes the main character in War and Peace -- I'm finally reading it and not just pretending I did to impress girls. Now, where is my damn Redbook? Enjoy.

Photo source: natalieportman.com