elliot-wolf - July 11, 2018
The Jonas brothers went from preaching purity and abstinence to crashing the wedding of a retired porn star and stripper. They’ve come a long way. Professional porn princess and full-time fornicator Mary Carey tied the knot with Dr. Joseph Brownfield, a man who enjoys the medical field and marrying women who have a history that you’ve probably erased from your browser history. Unless the Doctor has a suppressed cuck fetish, a divorce is inevitable once he realizes the world can watch his wife get pounded, stretched, stuffed, and tossed aside like just another Stromboli in the back of a pizzeria. She also happens to know what NBA player Dwight Howard’s penis looks like. Joseph should have just married a sex doll as the sex would be very similar, and he wouldn't want to kill himself when a judge orders him to pay alimony to a porn star.
Mary Carey's Cuban wedding got super random.
Turns out all 3 Jo Bros have been in Cuba too, and just happened to be dining in a separate part of the restaurant. Kev and Nick posed for this shot with the happy couple. Joeabstained.
Life is strange. I’d expect Katy Perry to crash a porn star’s wedding as she is a woman who always seems to forget to wear pants when she performs. Not the “holier than thou” Jonas Bros. But then again, aside from Justin Timberlake, what good has ever come from being in a boy band? It’s almost like it accelerates anyone in them down the path of deviancy at a Usain Bolt-like pace. I wouldn’t be surprised if Nick and Kevin lent a helping hand in the consummation process.
Photo Credit: Joe's gf Sophie Turner and Jonas Brothers From Getty Images
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