Selena Gomez

Selena Gomez Cleavage, Kelly Brook Bikini Asstastic, Sasha Cohen Bikini Yoga Highlight the Sextastic Twitpic Roundup

Girls working out. Girls suntanning. Girls hanging out in skimpy outfits. It’s all here in this week’s Sextastic Twitpic Roundup. Just when you thought it was safe to pull up the plastic sheeting, nay, resist, resist. The lovely ladies with the mighty fine bodies and the super egos are working their social media magic to make you lust them even more. It works just like that. A social contract nobody signed up for, but we all abide by. Hotties show off, oglers watch. Surrender now.

This week’s Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes Selena Gomez all kinds of fine, Lady Gaga and her new yoga body, Sasha Cohen bikini yoga fun time, Kelly Brook bikini booty, Bella Thorne workout booty, Izabel Goulart bikini hotness, and much much more. You owe it to Al Gore for inventing this Internet thing in the first place to check out each and every one of these amazing social media shares. They form a healthy part of a balanced diet. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Twitter/Instagram/Facebook

Taylor Swift, Selena Gomez, Salma Hayek Highlight Hotties at 2015 In-Style Golden Globes After Party

It seemed like everybody who was anybody outrageously hot stopped by the In-Style Golden Globes After-Party last night. It’s certainly the biggest of the bunch and most of the self-congratulating thespianic crowd plus a whole bunch of models and divas make their way to the party after the four hour ‘ain’t we awesome, peace out’ ceremony is over.

I’m talking Taylor Swift with her arm draped around Lorde like she was her date, Selena Gomez righteously hot, Alessandra Ambrosio, Sarah Hyland, Cara Delevingne, Hilary Duff, and a ton others looking all sparkly and shiny and cleavetastic. It’s eerily reminiscent of the parties I used to throw in high school, only with the addition of tons of ridiculously hot women. Okay, well, any women. Still, I had the best mixed tapes. I bet Lorde would’ve loved them. Enjoy.

Photo Credit: Getty

Sextastic Social Media Candids 2014: Emily Ratajkowski, Kate Upton, Selena Gomez and Much More

Our brief and completely non-scientific review of 2014 would not be complete without a visual mention of the continued growth of the sextastic celebrity self-published social media pics. Whatever you thought hacking or public relations warnings or desires to be taken super seriously were going to do to quell the rising tide of hot selfies and candids posted to Twitter and Instagram, well, they had zero impact. 2014 saw the continued boom of sweet celebrities showing more and more skin more and more often. Who says prayers aren’t answered directly.

Take a stroll down hot candid mammary lane once more with a look at a few dozen of my favorite self-posted celebrity photos of 2014. I can’t wait to see what 2015 holds and unholds in this regard. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez Cleavage, Arianny Celeste Bikini Booty, and Emily Ratajkowski Killer Funbags Rule the Sextastic Twitpic Roundup

And the sextastic hits just keep on coming. By way of social media where Tinsel Town’s hottest and brightest looking continue to ply their ego-fulfillment trade by way of posting hot candid photos of themselves to Twitter and Instagram and the like. It’s the modern equivalent of free lunch for the rest of us, though perhaps a little less free for the company paying us to work while we peruses the steamy selfies and amateurs instead. Ah, go on, they won’t mind.

This week’s Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes Arianny Celeste with bikini booty perfection, Emily Ratajkowski in several cleavage revealing numbers, Shay Mitchell super sextastic and showy, Jen Selter and her epic taut bikini curves, Selena Gomez flashing her chestal goodness, Kendall Jenner in just her Calvins, Nicki Minaj proudly peacocking her funbags, and much more. You owe it to Cousin Stan’s kids who will once more be getting half-thoughtless Christmas gifts from your checklist to check out each and every one of these revealing skintastic social media self-published treats. Seriously, you can shop better than this. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez Chesty Goodness in Multiple Outfits at the 2014 American Music Awards

I would be remiss if I didn’t close out the coverage of the limply limp 2014 American Music Awards with my personal highlight of Selena Gomez flashing chesty goodness in multiple wardrobe changes for the red carpet, show performance, and just hanging with her hottie besties in the front row of the audience. Selena has definitely grown into her pop diva role and the various revealing and form fitting outfits that come with such a job responsibility. And, my oh my, did she look stellar.

I can’t say Selena and her nearly bared niblets were enough to make watching those AMA’s horrific, let alone her sing clearly intended for the Devil’s Midget, but it certainly helped. Te amo, Selena. One day we’ll match that minxy body of yours to the appropriate Justin-free mindset and we’ll really have a home run. Until then, a solid triple with your luscious doubles. Enjoy.

Selena Gomez Cleavy At The Unlikely Heroes Awards Dinner And Gala

Sexy Selena Gomez was looking particularly cleavy and boobtastic at the Unlikely Heroes Awards dinner and gala. She was sporting a general’s jacket looking thing but forgot to wear either a bra or a shirt underneath. Silly Selena. She forgets to wear bras a lot of the time. I must say that I wholeheartedly approve. Selena has some of my favorite ta-tas of anyone in the biz. They are big and shaped nice without looking monstrous on her frame. What I’m saying is that her boobies suit her well. I often write in my dream journal about how it’s not fair that Justin Bieber has gotten to nuzzle into those lady pillows while I have not. I know that it’s just a stupid wish from a lonely boy from suburban Texas but I would like to hold those bad boys just one time before I die.

That will probably never happen, but I can dream can’t I?

Selena Gomez, Amy Adams, Kate Beckinsale and So Many Other Crazy Hot Decked Out A-List Ladies Cleave It Up for LACMA

Nothing to see here, just a decked out and dolled up super hottie party featuring the likes of Selena Gomez, Kate Beckinsale, Toni Garrn, Jennifer Lopez, Amy Adams and many more. It was like a parade of the women of my imaginary awards show where everybody wants to win an Oscar and Oscar is the nickname of my… well, you get the idea. A parade of of wicked hot A-list women in heels and gowns. I couldn’t be happier without them taking their clothes off.

The event was something to do with LACMA, the Los Angeles County Museum of Art where I often take dates to pretend I’m somebody I’m not. I’ve been told to be myself many times before, but I’ve also noticed I don’t get many second dates when the first is beer and go-kart racing. So I do the museum. Save the dirt track for the third date after I’ve hidden their passports and learned to say you’ll never see your beautiful village again in their native tongues. I’ve seen many interesting sights at LACMA, but none so artistically memorable as this red carpet lineup of lovely ladies. It was like the Oscars in November and without the self-serving speeches. Just perfect. Enjoy.