Salma Hayek tops my list of the sexiest women in the world. That’s not hyperbole either. I have a list of babes that I think are the most boobtacular and Salma is at the top of that list. Why? Two words: massive chi-chis. Or is that three words? It doesn’t matter, either way Salma Hayek simply has the greatest pair of funbags ever to fill up a bikini. But as if that wasn’t enough she’s also got a pretty righteous booty. Maybe it’s the Latin man in me but her curves are muy caliente and they fill me dreams. I remember when I first glimpsed Salma naked in the Robert Rodriguez classic Desperado. She is doing the deed in that movie with Antonio Banderas in a long steamy sex scene. I’m going to go pop in my Desperado DVD real quick.
OK, I’m back. It’s rare that Salma comes across my desk much these days because she’s a big shot in Hollywood now and lives in Italy. But let’s just say that she just made my holiday with these bikini pics.
Photo Credit: AKM-GSI
I’m not sure what Salma Hayek was shooting in Los Angeles with her sweet notorious funbags almost falling out of her top, I just know I’m ready to buy it. Movie, TV, commercial for urinary tract infections. I’m on it for five dozen on pre-order. The smoking hot Latina was all wet and low cut dress in the bathtub looking as she fumbled to keep her ta-ta’s from falling out of her dress top. Oh, that she could have just let that one, or two, go. The glory we’d be seeing this morning.
I’m not sure how Salma Hayek keeps on keeping on so damn hot year after year. I suppose it’s something billionaire husbands do tend to look for in a spouse. The same with broke gentleman oglers. Veteran hotties who seem to be getting more alluring and bustier by the day. Oh, Salma, come jump in my pool in a low cut dress. It’s an inflatable so you technically have to jump up and into the pool, but I’ll fill it with Evian just for you. Mi amor. Enjoy.
Sure, Cannes has more attitude than a sorority senior council meeting, but that doesn’t mean the fancy film festival doesn’t bring out the super hotties from all corners of the globe to get decked out and walk the wide crimson carpet. It seems as if every A-listed (on down to D-lister) is in Cannes this week wearing somebody famous and bedecked in jewels for the ten thousand paparazzi cameras. And, naturally, some of them caught our eye more than others over the weekend, including Blake Lively, Eva Longoria Jennifer Lawrence, Adriana Lima, Hilary Swank and others showing off their barest finest gala ware for the oohs and aahs of the assembled crowd and the worldwide leering audience.
My memories of Cannes are less glitzy gowns and more rocky public beaches and funny looking police hats shooing me here and there. But one day I would like to be the escort of one of these sextastic celebrities smiling broadly on the carpet as I whisper naughty suggestions into their ears. I assume that’s what everybody is telling each other in their ears as they make their way down the promenade. All I need now is the girl, and the super important movie that nobody will ever see. One of those will be easier than the other. Enjoy.
I’m not exactly sure why they were giving out British film awards last night in Los Angeles, but, what the heck, it brought a whole bunch of super hotties that much closer to our camera lenses which can never be a bad thing. Not when we get to see the good things cleavage style on the likes of Kelly Rowland and Salma Hayek who were flashing their moneymakers for the BBC America sponsored awards.
I’m not sure what kinds of mini-statues they were giving away, but they could do a lot worse than modeling Kelly and Salma in bronze for a man to wrap his hands around. So much hotter than squeezing Oscar. Enjoy.
If you’re wondering if Salma Hayek has still got it, oh, yes, she’s still got it. And if you’re wondering if she’s still flaunting it, oh, yes, she’s still flaunting it.
On the set of How to Make Love Like an Englishman (the name itself connotes a parody I assume), Salma was flashing her usual cleavy goodness, but with the aid of some well-timed wind and short skirt, also flashed her bare hot mommy buns for a brief moment in glorious time. And, yes, those cheeks are still more than squeezable. I can feel my hands reflexively contracting just staring at her now. Enjoy.
Talk about your heat waves. It’s been so hot here on the West Coast, even tanning mom applied sunscreen. Ba-dum-ching! The perfect environmental conditions for hiding in your air-conditioned abode, flipping on the little big screen and checking out some seriously skin-filled recommendations for ogle-worthy film viewing courtesy of our friends at Mr. Skin.
This week’s Mr. Skin Minute includes Salma Hayek and Maria Bello both not-nekkid in Grown Ups 2 coming out this weekend, but both definitely baring their bodies in Frieda and A History of Violence, respectively. Both epic levels of major celebrity making of the sexy scenes. Additionally, Spring Breakers is now out on Blu-Ray meaning another chance to see the epic barely covered three way pool scene with Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Benson, not to mention Rachel Korine baring her top for glory. And, finally, an ode to the classic 70’s R-rated gut-buster, Kentucky Fried Movie and one of the best boobtastic shower scenes ever on screen. Certainly a classic. All of them, must sees. So go see them now.
(And, do not forget your discounted membership to the entire Mr. Skin library of skin-baring good times. It truly is a great place for an addict to get his fix or a noob to become quite obsessed.)
Check Out the Uncensored Mr. Skin Minute Video »
Okay, granted, some of this is a stretch in terms of ‘Mexican’, but then again, so is wishing you a happy May 5th on May 3rd. We roll a little loose with the rules. But very tight when it comes to our lust for all things Latina and South of the Border hotness.
So, this weekend, as you get liquored up to celebrate Mexico kicking France’s ass, or, just because like me you get liquored up to celebrate anything at any time, think of these en fuego girls such as Salma Hayek, Jessica Alba, and Veronica Pliego and see if you don’t need a little private time in ell baño. Disfruta!