Miranda Kerr knows the competition in Cannes for hottest of the hot women is going to be stiff, so why not come out of the gates making tons of men stiff in her low cut, chesty dresses just for the occasion. I’m just thinking out loud here. Miranda Kerr doesn’t need my advice on how to wrap the world’s men around her finger, or bosom, but I’m going to offer it anyway.
Featured in two cleavetastic outfits by day and night at the froufrou French film festival, Miranda Kerr is but the tip of the super model hot-berg that shows up to Cannes each may for the films and all the related charity events and galas and yacht parties. Now I am jealous. Though I’d be just as happy sitting across from Miranda dressed like that at a Cleveland diner. That’s really all that truly separates Cleveland from Cannes. I’ve been to both. The food’s better in Cleveland. I have to give the girls up to Cannes, especially in May. Miranda, take me with you. I don’t care where. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: PacificCoastNews
Love clothing is so close to almost being there. Almost being epic. You get hot famous girls to start taking their clothes off for shoots, then blammo, something happens to corrupt the full potential of the sextastic. Not that you can go wrong with Miranda Kerr doing anything. I’d watch her clean toilets in a burqa covered with a bad Christmas sweater and feel nothing but undying lust. But if you get her with her clothes off, you need to ask her to move her arms apart, just for a bit.
In this promotional mini-pictorial, the uber-sextastic Aussie MILF brings all the heat, and tons of skin to bare, just as a little reminder to men around the world that she could break you with just one look. And you would thank her for it later. That’s the true power of women that men will never know. We’re all just victims. I think I love it. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Love
Uber-sextastic mom hot Miranda Kerr had always been something of a modestly bosomed tremendously good looking model type woman. So she caught me eye a bit more than usual over the weekend in the park in Santa Monica where he chest seemed to be especially proud. Perhaps it was her choice of support or just maybe she’s damn glad to be near the ocean, but the enticing Miranda looked even that much more alluring in her chestal area. It’s not that I’m complaining. Hardly. It’s just that I’m sort of supposed to be notified to any changes, modifications, or alterations to the funbags of Hollywood’s finest. There is a process.
Having said that, wow. Miranda, please check in so we can go through the standard measurement procedures. I have my tape measure. Yes, I know that’s not a real tape measure, but let’s refer to it as such in the event of anything legal. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: FameFlynet
Miranda Kerr simply won’t quit pimping the bras. They call them Wonderbras. Which I think is simply any bra Miranda Kerr wears. As in, I wonder if she knows every man in the world is imagining her taking it off as she steps slowly toward them and tells them she hasn’t been tickled properly in ages. Maybe that’s just me, but I bet it’s you too.
Miranda Kerr’s career has suffered little since leaving Victoria’s Secret. She hardly seems bereft of lingerie companies desperate to move their merch by way of her uber-sextastic appeals. There were rumors she was difficult to work with, which I’m not sure really are relevant to one of the world’s hottest women. So what. Say, yes, Ms. Kerr, anything you want Ms. Kerr, and you’ll be fine. I’m doing that right now just looking at her photos. If she threw her cell phone at me I’d only be more in love. Hurt me, Miranda. Starting with that Wonderbra. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: Wonderbra
Miranda Kerr‘s boobs and thumper make life worth living. (The Superficial)
These outtakes of Jessica Alba as a Sin City 2 stripper are amazing. (COED)
Herminone…err…Emma Watson wears a deep cleav jumpsuit. (Huffington Post)
Taylor Swift surprises Victoria’s Secret fans with her underpants. (TMZ)
Natalie Gall rolls around nekkid on a bed. That is all. (Hollywood Tuna)
Alexandra Daddario in GQ makes me feel funny in my swimsuit area. (Popoholic)
Heidi Klum‘s butt still has it, y’all. (Drunken Stepfather)
I know now that I was born not to play baseball. It took me six different coaches across several years begging me to find a new interest and a .112 batting average before I finally got the hint. What I was born to do, well, you’re reading it everyday I hope, you loyal above average educated beautiful readers. For Miranda Kerr, I bet the path to getting to be what Mother Nature intended for her was far more simple. Nobody wants to tell a young girl someday you’ll grow up and model skimpy lingerie, but I bet some people were thinking it in tbe backs of their heads. And, voila, Miranda is simply one of the single most sextastic purveyors of bras and panties among the seven billion or so human lifeforms roaming the planet.
Pimping for Wonderbra, Miranda Kerr shows exactly why she gets paid the big bucks to make women want to buy the bras she’s wearing. If I were a woman (c’mon, shooting star, pay off, please) I’d want to look like Miranda Kerr under my clothes, over my clothes, out of my clothes, and most especially during bubble bath with a mirror on the ceiling private fun time. Especially then. Oh, Miranda, it’s not only possible you’ve gotten hotter in the past five years, it’s most certainly true. Enjoy.
Photo Credit: GSI
Miranda Kerr‘s cleavage lit up all of New York City. (The Superficial)
Tara Reid is actually looking pretty hot again. (TMZ)
Roselyn Sanchez wears a see-through outfit to the Latin Grammies. (Huffington Post)
Christina Milian‘s nip goes peek-a-boo. (Drunken Stepfather)
Paz Vega‘s cleavage is muy caliente! (Hollywood Tuna)
Lisalla Montenegro wins Instagram with this bikini pic. (Popoholic)
Greer Grammer is miss Golden Globes and I’d like to see her Golden Globes. (COED)