Here’s five things I can’t afford. Paris. Anything Versace. And Mena Suvari, Emma Roberts, and Uma Thurman. I truly only care about the latter three. But at least I got to window shop as the three tasty celebrity treats got all dolled up for the Versace fashion show in Paris over the weekend. I guess it’s one of the 27 fashion weeks in Paris again. But I’m not complaining. Not when it brings the sextastic ladies out in their form fitting dresses.
Sadly, all three of these lovely lasses are well versed in the strict tight-crossing of the leg policy when viewing a fashion show from the VIP front row. No panties were flashed. But, my heart still went pitter patter. I’ll save the actual cardiac arrest for when I see the price tags on what the models were wearing. Enjoy.
I should mention, by way of name dropping, that I have been to the Beverly Hills Hotel before. I took a date. It was so expensive that I skipped lunch and ate a bite of my date’s sandwich when she was off powdering her nose, or, you know, phoning her girlfriends to tell them to phone her back in five minutes so she could pretend she had an emergency to get to to end our date. And when the valet told me the charge for my car was $37, I did a quick scrap value calculation and told him to keep the car. That was a fun day.
But, now, the grand old hotel that used to be the hottest place for married actors to go icognito bang their sidegirls back in the day, well, she’s turning 100, and there was a big party for that monumental occasion and several Tinsel Town hotties showed up for the event, but none hotter than the twin pairing of Mena Suvari and Stana Katic, both of whom put on a low-cut-dress exhibition worthy of the special occasion. I wish they had been my dates. I wonder how much it costs to park a limo there? Enjoy.
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These girls just can’t get enough of themselves, and, in the reverse, we can’t get enough of them. The solution for their narcissism and our lustissim? Twitter and Facebook by goody goodness. The social networks where for the fifteen minutes a day these sextastic celebrities are not being photographed by leagues of high-powered paid photographers, they are themselves creating photo magic with their personal cameras and cell phones and sharing even more intimate images of themselves with the world. It’s ever so perfect.
This week’s Sextastic Twitpic Roundup includes the likes of Kendall Jenner, Kari Byron, Arianny Celeste, Ariana Grande, and, well a ton ton more hotness. You really must see what the girls are doing when alone with their cameras. Enjoy.
Well, bad news, Mena Suvari and her concert promoter husband are calling it quits after a year and a half of matrimony. You know, the kids gave it a good shot, especially if you consider that a year and a half is almost 18 months or something like that.
The good news of course is that the often-sexy Mena Suvari has now begun her return-to-single status workouts, getting the old body back for whatever, or whoever, comes next. Out jogging in her spandex two piece, we can see the burgeoning body of the future comeback. We will definitely be tracking this anatomical adventure. Enjoy.
Amanda Seyfried knows how to handle a gun. (Popoholic)
New Heather Morris shoot packs a punch. (HuffPo)
Lake Bell thinks you’ll like her orgy. (FoxNews)
Lindsay Lohan and Mena Suvari catfight. (TMZ)
Jojo tweets yet another provocative photo. (DrunkenStepfather)
The world’s shortest train. (CollegeHumor)
Blake Lively looking particularly hot. (TheSuperficial)
What’s going on here? Mena Suvari’s best asset is the one that sounds like asset, and yet she’s not even showing it off. Yes, I’m talking about Mena Suvari’s ass, which we don’t even get to see in these Mena Suvari bikini pictures. And she posed for them, and everything. You’d think she’d be aware of the fact that she’s got nothing going on up front, and everything going on out back, but apparently not. Oh well, I guess we’ll just have to wait ’til next time.
Mena Suvari’s career has kid of gone down the crapper, but on the bright side, she still has a great ass! What? I’m just trying to be positive. I haven’t seen her anything lately, have you? That’s what I thought. Anyway, the point is, these Mena Suvari bikini pictures are hot, and that’s all that matters.