Haylie Duff

Hilary Duff? Nay, We’ve Got Haylie Duff and Her Big Bazoongas

Have we been short-shrifting older sis Haylie Duff for far too long now? Seeing her about town the other night in this balloon-bearing dress, I can't help but think there are at least two wonderful no-need-for-wonderbra reasons we should be covering Haylie Duff more often.

Yes, she can border on the rotund, the Duff sisters not being blessed with skinny jeans, err, genes. But she's also bordering on a massive pillow fight fantasy in my mind, where I'm using the deluxe faux down stuffed king sizes pillows from Bed Bath & Beyond and Haylie is using her queen sized home grown pillows, and we are slapping the crap out of each other until we collapse in sweaty exhaustion, and maybe make a baby in the process.

Funbags make everything okay. Enjoy.

The Duff Sisters Hit All the Sisterly Fantasy Marks

Oh, celebrity sisters, thy fetish fantasies you do incite.

Haylie Duff and Hilary Duff hit the gym or spa or spa gym or wherever celebrity girls who are just a tad chunky, but cute, hit after they slap on the lycra and tank tops, grab their expensive  handbags, and climb into their BMWs. Granted, Hilary Duff is already pregnant, so we're delving into double triple kinkiness, but I'm willing to bend my old-fashioned morals to play the role of Meat, in the production of the Duff Sisters Sandwich. The only thing left to decide -- before or after a good sweat? So many choices. Enjoy.

Ashley Tisdale and Haylie Duff Go Shopping For Girly Stuff

How come the girls never invite me when they go shopping for little bits of clothing and bikinis at their fancy little Beverly Hills stores? It's not as if I don't have more experience in and around the women's changing rooms at the upscale boutiques than any nine of them combined. I'm the one who after hundreds of hours of careful examination discovered that there are no price tags on women's undergarments. Epiphany. So, how come no invite from the likes of my petite and taut darling Ashley Tisdale and her sturdy friend Haylie Duff as they traverse the fancy knits and silks along Rodeo Drive. Wounded am I that the girls left me behind; despite my gallant offer to block the doors to the ladies room when it's time to regurgitate lunch. Enjoy.

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