Emmanuelle Chriqui

Emmanuelle Chriqui Bikini Pictures Drop Some Long Awaited Sexy on Miami Beach

Hooray for Fridays, which always deliver at least one wicked hot surprise. In this case, Emmanuelle Chriqui bikini pictures, tanned and curvaceous and delicious straight off of Miami Beach. We haven't seen the ridiculously hot Entourage star in her two piece in quite some time. I think it's fair to say she hasn't lost a step, or an inch of her epic female form, frontside, bootyside, and everywhere in between.

Someday, Emmanuelle will give us one completely open and honest account of her bare body, for the sake of future generations, naturally. And on that day, I will be carrying my magnifying glass and a handkerchief to catch my tears. Enjoy.

Emmanuelle Chriqui, Maria Menounos, and Ali Larter Deliver the Goods on ‘Mormon’ Red Carpet

I've kind of been waiting to see Book of Mormon for a while now, we've heard nothing but good things about the Broadway show from the South Park creators, and I had tickets for the show this very week, but for my Uncle Salvatore, who isn't really an uncle at all by any legal definition, shot part of his big toe off with a spear gun in a scuba equipment store and now I need to watch his dogs while he's in surgery getting his iced digit sewn back on. You'd be surprised how often things like this happen in the family.

But, to live virtually through others, it's not so bad, especially if those other Book of Mormon attendees are super hotties like Emmanuelle Chriqui, Maria Menounos, and Ali Larter, just three of the sextastic celebrities at the Book of Mormon premiere here in Los Angeles. Now, as much as I think I'd like this stage show, were I sitting betwixt these three ladies in the theater, I have a feeling it'd mostly be yawns and attempts at second base in the darkened theater for me, followed by the inevitable slap, arrest, and restraining orders. I have a box at home just to keep them all organized. Enjoy.

The Chomp is Here

Lindsay Lohan buys new teeth. (GossipCenter)

Olivia Wilde gets her magic on. (HuffPo)

Taylor Swift pissed about topless photo rumors. (FoxNews)

Nina Dobrev does her best Emma Watson look. (theFABlife)

Nicole Richie dresses as Jennifer Lopez. (LaineyGossip)

Hot chicks in bikinis for Monday. (GossipOnThis)

Emmanuelle Chriqui looking hot and stuff. (Celebslam)

Mila Kunis Red Hot at Friends With Benefits Movie Premiere

Finally, this Friends With Benefits media monstrosity is set to hit the streets, because I'm literally sitting beneath a pile of promotional material here so deep, it's making it hard to find all the good porn on my desk. Not that I'm not looking forward to seeing the sexier moments of the strikingly hot Mila Kunis in this certain-to-be more romantic than naughty comedy based upon yet another Craigslist-era hipster shorthand (still waiting for Casual Encounters, The Movie to be made).

Still, Mila looked all kinds of smoking hot in her little red dress at last night's premiere, and she was good enough to bring along a few Friends With Uber-Hotness, including Emmanuelle Chriqui, Irina Shayk, and Emma Stone. All of whom, by the way, if I were making this movie, would be the stars of a film about four hot girls who like to get nekkid and have casual, but committed making of the sexy before, during, and after shower time. But that's just me, a man who has had enough Justin Timberlake to last a lifetime and would prefer to see hot nekkid celebrity girls soaping each other's supremely awesome bodies. I doubt I'm alone in this regard. Enjoy.

Brooklyn Decker Leads List of Hotties (Once Again) at the ESPY Awards

Just like last year, super model sportsy hottie Brooklyn Decker took the title of sexiest red carpet babe at last night's ESPY Awards in Los Angeles. She'll probably win that particular title until she actually drops out of the competition. I love the ESPYs for the mere fact that there's absolutely no reason to have these awards other than to bring together a bunch of big named professional athletes with a bunch of big named super sexy celebrities, and, therein, is plenty reason enough.

In addition to Brooklyn Decker, ESPY sextastic standouts included lesbionic awesome Amber Heard, sportscaster hottie Erin Andrews, boobtastic Kendra Wilkinson, TV hostess Jill Wagner, hot TV actress Jaime Pressly, Bethany Hamilton, the world's sexiest one-armed surfer, Indy driver Danica Patrick, model Damaris Lewis, sexy-thesp Kerry Washington, Olympic skier Lindsey Vonn, and our recently featured amazingly hot Rachel Nichols.

Quite a shot. Enjoy.

Miranda Kerr and Ashley Greene Lead List of Uber-Hotties at Fashion Awards

Bless you, Council of Fashion Designers of America.

By way of disclaimer, everything I know about fashion comes on the advice of Lupita Li, my personal Target shopper. Everything made of cloth I have ever bought my girlfriend has been returned. I know bupkis about fashion (except that I dream of it being removed from hot women while they are shackled and oiled down before my La-Z- Boy recliner). However, I must applaud any ruse to bring together some of the hottest hotties in Hottieville for a parade of hotness, such as the Fashion Awards put on last night by the CFDA which spotlighted the sextastic of Miranda Kerr (such an effin' epic comeback), Ashley Greene (doll up like almost no other), Naomi Watts (looking very good), Amber Heard (putting the lips in lipstick lesbionics), Alessandra Ambrosio (never not super hot), Doutzen Kroes (another amazing post-baby recovery picture story), Emmanuelle Chriqui (who if we don't see nude onscreen soon, I'll be shocked), and Jessica Alba (who could be 22-months pregnant and I'd still find her awesome). I dare you not to enjoy.

Emmanuelle Chriqui Almost Topless In The Borgias (A Middling Victory from the Middle Ages) (VIDEO)

I lust Emmanuelle Chriqui as much as the next guy watching certain Entourage episodes over and over again in slow motion in his basement apartment, so I'm as cosmically outraged as the next guy over the fact that this super hot brunette simply does not get full-frontal onscreen, despite the virtual pleas of millions of men focusing their positive mental attitudes on just such a result. So, with Emmanuelle, we take what hotness we can get, including this sexy scene from the current episode of The Borgias, the internationally produced series running on Showtime in the U.S. about some insidious bastards during the Italian Renaissance that I know I studied about in a college class that I simply can not remember. I probably would've paid more attention in school had we studied the parts of the Renaissance where sextastic Emmanuelle Chriqui gets almost topless in a see-through nightgown for a wild sex scene. Yep, I could've munched a Slim Jim and kept the eyelids in the upright and locked position for that. Enjoy.

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